A Trip for a Walk
by AlkalineLeigh
Summary: When Bella's best friend,Alice,enters her into America's Next TopModel, life may change for the better or worse. While Bella fights to be on top and actually get something out of life, she finds herself falling for one of the judges,Edward Masen.All Human
1. Chapter 1

BPOV 

"Alice, I don't want to do this," I said quietly as we sat in the airport parking lot. We still had twenty minutes before I needed to go through the whole boarding process. Alice sighed and shook her head.

"Yes, you do Bella. We both know that you can kick any one of those girls out of the competition. You'll thank me for this when you're famous." Alice was my best friend, the only person in this world that I ever really talked to. After High School, my mom and I had basically lost contact. Things stayed the same with my dad, we never really talked much, but with my mom, the change was drastic. We communicated maybe twice a month at first and then soon after that, twice a month turned into once every two months. Alice was there to fill in the chunk that Renee had ripped out of me. At first, I didn't understand why things were the way they were, but after my first year in college, it hit me. I wasn't her fun little girl now, I was an adult with a life of my own and my mother couldn't handle it. What I wouldn't give to have her back in my life.

In the terminal, Alice latched her arms around me a squealed. "Oh, Bella, I'm going to watch every episode _and_ TiVo them!" I sighed and returned the hug.

"You better," I mumbled into her shoulder. She laughed.

"God, I'm going to miss you so much. If you don't call me, I swear Bella, you sevens are going in a burning trashcan," she said in a playfully threatening voice. I smirked.

"That's too bad…my sevens are in my suitcase." She rolled her eyes and pulled me into a hug again. Tears stung my eyes as I walked onto the plane and I choked them back as I sat in my seat. When I looked through the window, I saw Alice hopping up and down and waving in the terminal—my seat was placed parallel to where we had said goodbye. I smiled lightly and the plane began to move away from the terminal building.

As my letter instructed me to do, as soon as I got off of my plane and found my bag, I looked around for the noted J. Alexander who was supposed to be holding some sort of sign. The letter I received in the mail was far from formal. It was more along the lines of this:

_Bella,_

_We are very excited to tell you that you are one of the thirteen contestants for America's Next Top Model. Along with this letter, you will also receive a plane ticket…_

The rest of the letter seemed to be personalized by one of the judges. When I read it at first, I thought it was a joke. I was at least expecting them to call me by Isabella and not take my, or Alice's, notations on the audition form seriously. But no, after Alice called and confirmed the letter, I knew I had no choice but to go on the show and model my heart out. They paid for my plane tickets—yes, tickets, one for me to get there and one for me to get back home—it was the least I could do.

At first glance, I was incredibly shocked by J. In all my life, I had never met a man who pulled off dressing and acting as a woman so well. There were already three girls there and one of them automatically sent me a steely glare. My cheeks flared and I looked away. I could tell that this would be difficult for me, but I had promised myself that I would always be the bigger person in situations like this.

"Hello there dear!" J greeted me. I smiled and grasped the hand that was outstretched in front of me. Mentally, I wasn't sure whether to refer to J as he or she. After shaking hands, I decided on he only because of his facial structure. It was too masculine for him to be considered a female through my eyes. The other's arrived soon after I did and we piled into a giant van and drove to an important looking building. While J led us through the building, I noted that he walked really well in heels. Of course, seconds after thinking any thoughts like that my cheeks burned and I looked down at the floor.

He took us to the roof of the building. My eyes widened as I took in the scene. This was a photo shoot. I didn't look passable for even a night on the town; plane rides have always taken a lot out of me. Chances were my hair looked like a haystack and the makeup that Alice had forced me to wear was smudged all over my face.

There was one man with a camera and several other men with digital equipment. J stood to the side and watched with a girly grin on his face. After at least five girls had gone, one of the crew men instructed me to stand on a line of blue tap that was stuck to the ground in front of a blue back drop.

While focusing my eyes fully on the camera lens, I pouted my lips slightly enough to make my cheeks look less round and tilted my head. Over a series of ten shots, I gave several various poses, all involving me locking my eyes with the camera. Though I hadn't ever had any sort of professional training, one thing that I knew was that making contact with your eyes when taking head shots was almost crucial.

Once again, we piled into the van and drove off. This time we stopped in front of a hotel and dumped ourselves into several rooms. I don't know how many of us there were, but there were definitely more than thirteen girls and I was sure that the real competition began when there were only thirteen girls left. A lot of the girls there were nice. These twins especially surprised me; they had the most open personality I had seen since arriving. They were gorgeous—the two of them were both incredibly thin and tall, I would say they were at least six feet tall and younger than everyone else there.

"So, where are you from?" one of the twins asked me. I didn't know anyone's names yet.

"Oh, I'm from Phoenix," I said. "What about you?" she smiled.

"I'm from California. I live in Anaheim. What's your name by the way?" she asked. Small beads of relief coursed through me when I realized that this girl wasn't in it to play some mean joke on me.

"I'm Bella," I said. She extended her hand and a grasped it. 

"I'm Amanda. This is my sister Michelle," she introduced. "I don't expect you to remember that," she said with a laugh. I laughed along with her, thankful for her high spirits. Not only that, but I would really have to look to be able to differentiate between the two of them. These girls were true identical twins.

That night, I got a pretty restless sleep. Most of the girls did from the nerves. In my case, I couldn't close my eyes and get comfortable in a room full of girls that had never seen before tonight. I may have been able to sleep for a full three hours if I had just been with the twins I had met earlier, but that wasn't the case and sleep was impossible.

In the morning, the hotel room was a zoo. There weren't enough electrical outlets for all of us to use. While some girls were willing to share their hair irons, others said no just to be spiteful. Most of the girls didn't bring mirrors big enough for a full makeover with them, so of course the bathroom was even worse than the other room. Alice packed smart and somehow shoved a compact mirror into my already too full bag.

I always kept my makeup simple—normally I didn't put any on. Seeing as how I promised Alice that I would at least make an effort to doll myself up, I sat cross-legged in an empty corner and applied as little makeup as possible. My outfit wasn't as simple as my makeup though.

I pulled on a dark blue silk top that cinched at the bust line. Ribbons hung at the side and I tied them in a bow behind my back. I pulled on my lucky sevens and finished my outfit with black ballet flats. My hair didn't really need any fixing in my opinion. Dealing with the mob of crazed women wasn't worth it.

My hair hung around my shoulders in soft waves from sleeping. I decided against brushing it knowing that the waves would come out and turn into a straight mess if I did. After several complaints and arguments that could have evolved into catfights, we traveled in a giant group to the roof of the hotel. I was surprised to see that the roof was not only decorated with a stage and several tables but to find half of them already filled with more contestants.

I sat at a table with a group of girls that were plastered with makeup and hairspray and waited. When Tyra came out from behind the stage, everyone erupted into a clamor of cheers and claps. Most of the girls cried. I stood and clapped, not bothering to get too out of hand like the girls that I was sitting with. After an introduction, Trya announced that they would be starting personal interviews now.

I gulped. Not only was I going to have a face-to-face interview with one of the century's greatest models, but also my name was way at the bottom of the list. After what seemed to be ages of pointless mingling and greetings, a security guard called me name and motioned for me to walk back into the hotel. Shakily, I stood up and walked forward to be interviewed. This was my only shot at getting something out of life.

_AN: so here's the first chapter! I'm basing this one off of ANTM cycle 7, which is one of my favorite seasons. Of course, I'm not basing it off of the season completely because that's just not cool. I hope you guys like this, R&R and tell me what you think! _


	2. Chapter 2

BPOV

The guard led me into the lobby and through a series of doors until he pointed to a closed one and nodded. "Do I just go in?" I asked. The guard shrugged and walked off with a grunt.

Hesitantly, I pushed open the door and looked in. Tyra was sitting on in a luxurious looking couch with her legs crossed. Across from her there was a heavily cushioned chair and surrounding the area were several cameramen equipped with cameras, booms, and other sound equipment. "Well hello there Miss Bella," Tyra greeted. My cheeks tingled lightly.

"Hi," I said quietly. _No, you can't hold back now, you're in too deep_, I scolded myself mentally. A producer came up from behind me and handed me a tiny microphone.

"Oh, you can just stick that right down your shirt, that's what I did," Tyra said with a small laugh. I laughed lightly and shakily clipped the microphone onto my bra. Normally, I wouldn't have done it, but I knew that modesty wasn't appreciated in the modeling business.

"Don't worry hon.; we aren't filming yet," she laughed more. I laughed with her once again and took a seat across from her. The cameraman behind me snapped his fingers.

"Three, two…" he snapped his fingers again and the cameras started rolling.

"Well Hello there Miss Bella," she repeated. I smiled.

"Hello there Miss Tyra!" I said, taking her off guard. I'm sure my change in personality took her off guard. She let out a long string of laughter. This woman was perfect on camera.

"So, even though I've got all of your information in a pretty little portfolio somewhere, I want to know a little bit about you. Where are you from?" she asked.

"I'm from Phoenix, Arizona," I answered. She raised her eyebrows.

"You have really fair skin for someone who lives under sun like that," she commented. I shrugged.

"My mother is part albino," I joked.

"And I'm guessing you are about 5'7 in height, right?" she asked. I nodded. (_AN- I know she's really 5'4, but the requirements for ANTM is at least 5'7 in height.) _"Well, if I may say so myself, I love your outfit," Tyra said with a smile. I blushed and thanked her.

"Now, you're a college student, so what do plan on majoring in?"

"Uhm, right now I plan on majoring in accessory and apparel design," I said. She nodded.

"I can tell, really your outfit is absolutely adorable," she said, her face animated. I smiled. "Well, thank you for coming down, the results will be known by tomorrow, and don't worry Bella, half of the interview is going to be edited out," she winked. I smiled and waved while walking out of the room.

* * *

As soon as I was out of the room, a giant wave of relief rushed out of me. The hard part for me was over. As I walked back to the hotel room, I mentally coached myself. _Pull yourself out of your shell! Alice isn't here to kick you out of it anymore! Don't be afraid of them…no…don't be a bitch to them. Stand your ground. _I could only imagine how my face looked right now—my facial expressions got a little bit out of control when I talked to myself.

In the hotel room, only a few girls were there. One of them was on a cell phone, talking animatedly to someone on the other end. "Yeah right, I nailed it! Are you kidding me? Can you say slut?" she said rudely. My cheeks burned and I looked away. Seeing her on the phone reminded me that I could call Alice. After digging around in my suitcase, I pulled out my cell phone that was almost brand new and completely unscathed.

After switching it on, I saw that I had eight missed calls. Oops. In each one, Alice got snappier and snappier. In the last message, she sounded a little bit scary.

"Damn it Bella! Turn your phone on! I'm so pissed at you right now; it's not eve funny. The next time I call, you had better answer your phone. I have important things to say to you! Do you NOT love me? Is that it? Fine then, I'm moving out! Yeah, you heard me, I'm moving out. And" the message cut her off after that. 

I sighed and dialed her number. She answered after the first right. "Bella!" she shouted. I held the phone away from my ear.

"Hey you," I said after she stopped screaming into the phone.

"It's so empty here…" she trailed off.

"Sorry babe, but you never know, I could be back home tomorrow," I said, saying anything to make the sadness in her voice go away.

"Don't you dare say that!" she snapped. "How you did your interview go?"

"It went fine, Tyra is really nice," I answered.

"Good! So listen, I've been thinking, which do you like better? Manhattan, or Hollywood?"

"I don't know…why?" I asked.

"Because, silly, when you're famous, we can't live in dumpy old Phoenix, no one famous lives here!" she said. Her voice tinkled with excitement.

"Oh…okay, well, why don't we wait until that time comes around, kay?"

"No way, we are going anyway! People will see you on TV. I looked already. They have penthouses in New York and in California. But, I know you hate the cold, so are we sticking with California?" she asked.

"Sure Alice, California." I gave up. She squealed again. A group of girls came into the room and to be honest, they sounded like they were hyped on caffeine. Did they even serve food or any other substance up there?

"Oh wow…what the hell was that?" Alice asked. I choked back a laugh.

"A bunch of girls came in. I gotta go," I said quickly.

"Aww…okay. CALL ME!" Alice demanded. I hung up the phone and slipped it into my pocket.

That night, several of the girls wanted to go out to celebrate. Apparently the high from being interviewed by Tyra Banks hadn't worn off. While they all grabbed their purses, one of the girls that I sat with on the roof grabbed my hand.

"Come on!" she said, pulling me out the door. I tried to protest, but anything that I would have said wouldn't be audible. These girls were way too loud. The girl didn't let go of my hand and I became extremely uncomfortable being squeezed through the hallway with a girl I didn't even know.

* * *

"I'll get us a cab, alright?" she girl said. I nodded and she pulled us out the front door. She was incredibly rowdy and hopped up and down on the curb. Knowing that it would be illegal, she didn't whistle to hail the cab. In the cab, the girl finally let go of my hand. "I'm Brooke," she introduced.

"I'm Bella," I returned. After a few seconds of incredible silence, I broke in. "Can I ask you something?"

"Yeah," she answered happily.

"Why did you bring me with you?" She shrugged.

"You looked kinda sad, so I just grabbed your hand and pulled. I mean, no one knows if we are going to make it into the competition, but we might as well have fun while it lasts, right?" I was suddenly grateful for her boldness and felt my nerves loosen a little bit.

"I guess you're right," I smiled and then realized that I had no idea of where we were going. "Where are we going?"

Brooke laughed. "I don't know, I told the driver to follow the others!" she confessed. My eyes widened as I took in the sea of taxis that we were stuck in the middle.

"Excuse me?" I asked the driver. He looked back at me and grunted. "How do you know which taxi to follow?"

"Kid, when you've been doing this for as long as I have, you get pretty good at it—remembering license plates and all." He looked back at road, seeming to be pleased with himself. After fifteen minutes through traffic, the driver stopped in front of a building with a long line going out the door. You could hear loud, rhythmic techno music pounding through the doors. I had no idea if we would get kicked out of the competition for this.

"Thanks!" Brooke shouted and tossed a wad of money at the driver. He smiled appreciatively and drove off as soon as we got out.

"There they are!" I heard someone shout. "Brooke!" An extremely tall girl with curly black hair came toward us, bouncing with excitement. Brooke leaned into me and whispered,

"That's my friend April." I nodded quickly and we walked into the group of familiar looking girls. One of them got the courage to walk up to the bouncer. She puffed her chest out and tapped him on the shoulder.

"Hey," she said. "We're on Next Top Model, wanna let us in?" she asked, rotating her chest slightly. I couldn't help but role my eyes. Brooke and April laughed next to me and then smirked as we saw the bouncer size her up.

"A'ight," he answered, stepping out of the way so we could all pile in. It was that easy. I felt sorry for the long line of people that gaped as they saw the large number of us seep into the building. As I passed the bouncer I mumbled a thanks and then became submerged in a giant crowd filled with techno, alcohol and dancing.

Brooke once again grabbed my hand and pulled me over to the bar. I realized that I had almost no choice but to order a drink. Normally, I had a pretty high tolerance for alcohol—all those 'raging college parties' that Alice had forced me to attend actually did pay off. We pushed our way through the large crowd surrounding the counter and pressed ourselves against it.

A really young looking guy came over to us and nodded. "I'll have a Staten Island Ferry," Brooke ordered. He pulled his eyebrows together in confusion. A more burly man with a goatee and several tattoos shoved him out of the way.

"Sorry 'bout him, he's new," the bartender explained. "So, what'll it be?"

"A Staten Island Ferry," Brooke said once more. He nodded and looked at April.

"I think I'm in the mood for an Appletini," she said. He nodded and then looked at me.

"Oh…I want a Blue Hawaii," I said. His eyebrows rose.

"Good choice," he muttered and then walked off to make our drinks. I looked around and spotted several people that I had seen at the hotel. The twins, of course, weren't here; they weren't old enough to even get in, let alone buy themselves a drink. I barely passed myself and was surprised when both bartenders didn't ask me for I.D.

The bartender came back and passed out the drinks. I drank mine slowly and by the time I finished mine, April had had three drinks. One was enough for me—I didn't plan on being hung-over when I saw the results tomorrow. They continued to order more drinks, but I just sat there and watched. Soon after I set my glass down, the girls dragged me onto the dance floor. The music blared so loud that I could feel the beat in my feet through the floor. I stood there motionless and watched April and Brooke make total fools out of themselves. Every once in a while I would laugh out loud.

It wasn't too long before Brooke had me dancing. The only difference is that I wasn't drunk and had a good direction of where I was going…and looking. I finally ended our fun and told the girls that we needed to get back home. It was 11:30 and who knew, maybe the producers did night checks?

After hailing a taxi, the three of us made our way back to the hotel room and crashed in a heap on the floor. Brooke and April crashed much harder than I did, but at least tonight I would get a better sleep than I did last night.

Most of us in the hotel room woke to the sound of someone banging on the door. This definitely wasn't room service. One of the girls who I didn't know shuffled over to the door and opened it. "You guys are expected in the lobby within the next fifteen minutes," a muffled voice said. I snapped my head up and took the liberty of waking up the girls around me. They groaned and sat up before flopping down on the floor and mumbling into the carpet.

"Uhm… guys?" I asked quietly. "We have fifteen minutes until we need to be in the lobby." After I said that they both hopped up and joined the chaos in the room. Repeating the same process as yesterday, I crawled into my corner and fixed myself. My hair wasn't as cooperative as it was yesterday so I pulled it into a bun. For my outfit I pulled out a white camisole and pulled a black cardigan over it. I wore a denim mini skirt in place of my jeans that I had slept in and pulled on my pair of flip-flops.

After switching my phone on, I quietly left the hotel room and made my way to the lobby. I was surprised to find it empty and laughed when I realized what this was. Almost like a sports team in High School, there was a small sheet of paper tacked up to the wall. It read:

_America's Next Top Model Final Contestants:_

_Babin, Amanda_

_Babin, Michelle_

_Calhoun, Monique_

_English, CariDee_

_Evans, Christian_

_Joseph, Anchal_

_Miller, Brooke_

_Morales, Megg_

_Morris, Megan_

_Stewart, AJ_

_Swan, Bella_

_Washington, Eugena_

_Young, Jaeda_

My eyes scanned down the list once and then made their way back up when I thought I saw something familiar. _Swan, Bella…Bella Swan. _The words registered in my head and I quickly turned around, grabbed the small trashcan next to the heater, and hurled.

**AN: Thanks so much for reviewing guys! You are totally awesome! So...a couple of you may be thinking that I'm going to turn this into a sleazy secret romance between Edward and Bella, right? WRONG! Though the romance may be a little bit secret...well...I'm not giving anything away. But Edward will show up in either the next chapter or the one after that. They should come up quickly too because I don't have school or anything to do for a while. Review please!**


	3. Chapter 3

**BPOV**

My mouth tasted disgusting, but I slowly stood up from the trashcan was walked out of the lobby. Had I really gotten in? I was nothing special, just an average girl with an average face and an average body. In the hotel room, there were a few girls who were not only crying and had mascara running down their faces, but were shoving their belongings into their suitcases violently. Before walking out, one of them who I didn't know turned around and spat out, "Bitch," before slamming the door.

I sat on the couch, stunned at what had just happened. What did I ever to do her? It's not like I had any control over who got in and who didn't. I hesitantly pulled out my phone and dialed Alice's number. _Here goes_.

"Did you get in!?" Alice asked after the first ring. I got the sense the she had been sitting by the phone.

"Promise you won't scream?" I asked.

"No," Alice answered. I sighed and prepared myself for about 80 decibels of high-pitched squeal.

"Yeah, I got in." Just as I suspected, Alice's screams of excitement rang through the phone and I ended up holding the device away from my head. After a while, I asked, "Are you done now?" Alice sighed and giggled.

"What did you do when you found out?" she asked. She would be seriously pissed if she found out about my reaction.

"It's not really important," I mumbled.

"Oh come on! I wanna know! I'm not there to see these things, I need details," Alice nagged.

"Well, I definitely didn't react the same way you did," was all I told her.

"Bella, aren't you happy about this at all? You are going to be a model and I'm gonna be your designer. Well be rich and famous together, just like we promised in high school, do you remember that?" She sounded genuinely upset. Alice wasn't the one in this competition. Alice didn't have a problem with being a total bitch to whoever needed to be put in her place.

"Yeah, I'm happy Al, I just need some time for this to sink in." Alice squealed happily before we hung up. Seconds later, a group of girls walked into the room. Relief coursed through me when I saw they were happy. These must be the other contestants. A few girls already had their bags with them.

All in all, it was a pretty awkward moment. All of were just staring at each other—our only true obstacles in this competition. Not long after we started talking with one another, the door opened and we were introduced to Jay Manuel accompanied my Ms. J.

His personality surprised me. I had always thought that they just acted this way from the camera. "Well hello ladies!" he greeted with his arms wide. The gesture didn't say "come give me hug," the gesture said "welcome".

"Congratulations for making the final thirteen," he smiled. After piling into the same van as before, we were driven to a giant warehouse. At first, I thought this was where we would be staying. My jaw almost dropped when we walked in and saw what this place really was. In the center of the room, there was a giant runway and everything else was situated like a giant amphitheater.

"So, ladies, ready for your first challenge?" Jay asked. _(AN Jay Jay Manuel. Ms. J J. Alexander) _Ms. J finally spoke. For this challenge, we are going to be working exclusively with Elmer Ave.!" He swayed his arms as he spoke and the girls erupted into cheers when we saw the members of Elmer Ave. walk across the runway and stop before the edge.

"Hey girls, we're Elmer Ave, and these are you models," one of them gestured toward the runway and out of nowhere, thirteen incredibly well dressed and good looking guys appeared on the stage. Another guy stepped forward.

"Now, for your challenge, you will be taking the clothes off of the backs of one of these models. Your job is to model the clothes on the runway." The third guy stepped forward.

"We're looking out for a good walk and a good flaunt. You have fifteen minutes and remember, we love rock." The guy finished and someone blew a whistle. I ran forward with the other girls and stopped in front of a guy wearing a vintage plaid jacket. After stopping and smiling at him, we raced back stage where I ripped off his jacket off of his shoulders.

I so wasn't wearing the right undergarments for this, nor did I have any desire to undress in front of a male model. With a sigh, I flipped my shirt over my head and pulled his jacket over myself and slipped off my jeans, fixing the boy shorts that I was wearing so that it looked like I was simply wearing very short shorts. The model was respectful and didn't drool over me.

"I'm Tom," he introduced.

"Bella," I returned. In my mind, I was going over rockish things I could do on the runway. A friend that Alice and I shared in High School was a rock junkie. I had to have picked up something from him. He was always flashing me this hand sign. It reminded me of Metallica. That's what I would do; at the end of the runway, I would flash the sign.

"Ladies, you have two minutes!" Jay shouted from the other room. I pulled the tie of off Tom's neck and fixed it around mine so it hung loosely. When I walked, the jacket, of course, would flare open, therefore exposing my body to the judges. Mentally, I was celebrating at the fact that they weren't disgusting horndogs.

Walking out in the flip-flops that I was wearing would really throw my whole look off, so I kicked them in a pile with my other clothes and walked over to the runway entrance barefoot. Ms. J called the names out. AJ…Jaeda…Megan…Anchal…Megg…CariDee…Megan…Bella.

I walked out onto the runway, almost stomping my feet and swaying my hips. I walked in a pattern where my feet almost crossed each other. At the end of the runway, I stopped, flashed the sign and stuck my tongue way out. I almost burst out laughing when I thought of how this must look, but hey, they said _rock_.

On my way back, I passed one of the twins and she looked just a little bit shaky. When I got back stage, the challenge seemed to end in seconds. We were called out back on the runway and we all grouped together on the edge. One the Elmer guys came forward.

"All right, some of you had a pretty good idea of what we were looking for…and some of you have some things you need to work on. We've decided that the winner of this challenge is going be Bella." I stood there in shock. After that ridiculous pose and being half naked on a runway, I actually won the challenge? Holy Crap.

"You had a great walk, you chose a great outfit, and you rocked the runway. Congratulations." He stood back in line with the others and small smile broke out across my face.

"Congrats Bella, you won the challenge and at our photo shoot you will be rewarded greatly," Jay said. "Why don't we thank the Elmer guys for coming all the way out to L.A." All of us immediately broke in with the "thank you so much" and "I love you designs."

I'm almost positive that we were all expecting the same thing when we walked out of the warehouse. We though we would get stuck in the dump van again. But no, waiting outside is a huge stretch hummer limo, and the inside is completely decked out. We all relished in the comfort of the leather seats and the endless legroom that the limo provided. After twenty minutes, the driver pulled over and we piled out. In front of us was the biggest house I had ever seen.

* * *

We all charged inside, several of the girls screaming with excitement. This house was a palace. The space inside of it was filled with different rooms and tons of couches. The walls were lined with magazine covers of Tyra. We all ran around, checking out every space and I came to a room that had beds lining each wall. There were only 11. Quickly, I raced forward and took my pick of a bed. It was right next to window—I loved sleeping next to the windows; you could feel the cold air of the night through them, even if they were closed. Plus, whenever I couldn't sleep, looking out at night usually helps.

After dumping my bag on the bed, I watched as the girls found there way here and battled the beds out. No one seemed to be paying attention when Monique, "queen of the world", dumped water on Eugena's bed. My mouth fell open. What kind of person would do that? Jeez, if you think you're that great, then sleep on the beanbags for a night until someone else goes home.

Eugena came into the room and saw Monique sitting on her bed with the wet spots on the blanket. "Excuse me, that's my bed," Eugena said. Monique just shook her head. "Oh no…what is that?" She shrugged.

"I went pee." Eugena jumped back.

"You went pee on my bed? Why would you do that? The bathroom is down the hall Monique!" One of the twins came out of the bathroom in a towel with her hair dripping.

"What happened?" she asked politely.

"Monique went pee on my bed," Eugena said, the shock still evident in her voice.

"I guess it's not your bed anymore, huh?" Monique spat, examining her nails. She looked up for a second and pointed to the beanbags. Tears brimmed up in Eugena's eyes before she walked over to the beanbags and dropped her things on top of the. Some sort of odd feeling bubbled up in my chest; it was almost like an intuition. Everyone could tell that Monique was going to make everyone's lives a living hell while she was in this competition. That became clearer within the next few hours.

**AN: Hi guys. I have a couple of things on my list of things to say. So, someone asked me what Bella looks like. I couldn't really find anyone. I found someone with the perfect face for her, but she's a blond and I couldn't fix it in photoshop. So, I found someone else who really isn't spot on, but shes close. So, if you look, imagine Bella with eyes that aren't quite as big as this actresses. We all know that it's impossible to find the right Bella. **

**Next on my list of things...In case you guys couldn't tell, Bella is taking the place of Melrose. No, Bella's personality is nowhere near Melrose's, that would be suicide. Sorry to any Melrose fans**

** And lastly, Edward definitely will be in the next chapter. Thanks for reading and reviewing! Much love... **


	4. Chapter 4

**BPOV**

By the second morning, Eugena called a house meeting. I knew where this was going; the house was a mess. Though I had tried to do my part and keep my things clean, it got hard after a while. Things were much different when you were sharing a house with twelve other girls. Life in general is different. We all lounged in the living room while Eugena stood in front of us.

"Okay, so, we've been here for two days now, and this place is an absolute mess." Ironically enough, we all nodded. "So, I think we could all do our part by just trying to keep all of our things clean, you know? We all have certain things that we do when we're in our homes, but while we're sharing it with other people, our habits and such might need to change a little bit." There was an awkward pause before AJ spoke up.

"Yeah, like we could try not to take an hour long shower. Sure, I take an hour long shower while I'm at my house by myself, but I think we should shorten it so everyone can at least have some hot water." Monique stood up, pulling her reign over us as spoke.

"I'm sorry, but I take long showers. That's just who I am," and she crossed her arms over her chest. Michelle, one of the twins, snorted.

"You missed the whole point of this conversation. You're unwilling to change for anyone." All of the girls were obviously pissed off. None of us had it in ourselves to lay it on her. All that would do was make the competition even harder. That night, we got our first real Tyra-Mail. The girls went crazy, all of them flocking around Megan who had chanced to see an envelope sitting on a small tray next to the door.

We had our first photo shoot in the morning. We all jumped around, excited about what would be happening. Then, when Megan revealed that we had to be ready to go by seven, we all quieted down, and went to bed. I lucked out, around my bed, Brooke, Megan, Amanda, and Michelle had their beds. It seemed like the far side of the room was filled with people that I chanced to get along better with.

* * *

At 5:30, a few alarms went off. I groaned and stretched into my pillow. Didn't they have makeup artists and hair stylists at photo shoots? Why were people getting up so early? With a sigh, I slumped out of bed and looked around. Only three people had gotten up. I shuffled into a vacant bathroom with my clothes and hopped in the shower. I dumped some of my shampoo into my palm and scrubbed it into my hair. If someone was going to be doing my hair for me, I wasn't about to let my hair hang greasy and dirty in any way shape or form.

When I got out of the bathroom, most of the girls were up. In the kitchen, I made myself a piece of toast and grabbed of bottle of water. As far as breakfast was concerned, I was good to go. We piled into the van and drove to the shoot. The area that we were in was really nice. It was a resort of some sort. Jay led up all to an opening and this yelling and screaming startled me. When we looked up, Tyra walked in through these doors, surrounded by cameras and men. She was screaming in some foreign accent about us being rich bitches and how she hated us for being young. I knew this was a joke and laughed willingly. When Tyra screamed about her not having wind on her face, Jay instructed us to blow on Tyra. This infuriated her even more and she stormed away. When she left, we were still laughing, though some were shocked.

"Well, ladies, I hope you don't think that's how Tyra really acts," Jay said laughing. "Today, for your first photo shoot, you are going to be modeling the dreaded model stereotypes." He handed out the rolls. I was surprised at some of them. Casting couch model, black-girl-turned-white-girl, Plastic surgery model. My role scared me just a tad. 10,000 dollars a day model. How was I supposed to do that one? Jay turned to me.

"Don't think I've forgotten Bella! Since you won the challenge, you will be treated as a diva for the day. This is your manager for the day, Lindsay." I was shocked. In all honesty, I had forgotten about winning. With everything that was going on at the house, it was hard to remember much of anything. Lindsay led to me a room where I got a manicure and pedicure. Someone came into the room and said that I needed to get my makeup done. After thanking my manicurist and Lindsay, I followed the person to a studio where most of the girls were being primped in.

My stylist was an extremely thin blond. She was gentle with my hair and pulled it into thick rollers. Then, she turned me over to a makeup artist. This man had a thick Italian accent and smelled faintly of beer. When he turned me around in the chair, I was shocked at my reflection. Everything about my face looked fake. You couldn't see me behind it at all.

"You don't like it?" he asked.

"No, I like it," I answered.

"You lie," he spat. My chest tightened. This man didn't know me, how could he think I was lying?

"No, I'm not. You did a wonderful job, thank you," I said and turned to find Lindsay. She was waiting by the door. Lindsay led me a patio with a waiting massage chair. The massage was luxurious, but the problem happened when the masseuse caught my robe on a lawn chair.

"Oh no," he muttered. Lindsay waved her clipboard at me, telling me it was my time for the shoot. The masseuse pulled at my robe, but Lindsay rushed in and stopped him.

"No! You can't tear that! It's her costume," she explained and they spent ten minutes trying to unhook it. All I could do was sit there with a towel draped over my naked body. My cheeks tingled and I prayed that the heat on my face wouldn't melt the makeup. When they finally got it undone, I raced into the building. Jay looked unhappy.

"I'm so sorry," I said as soon as I came into the room. "The masseuse clipped my robe to a lawn chair and it got stuck," I explained. His face softened.

"Oh, that's okay, lets just hope it doesn't happen again," he said. I smiled and crawled on top of the bed. Another model came over to me with a giant paycheck that read $9,999. Though I modeled and did the best that I could, several times throughout the shoot, Jay would shout,

"Come on Bella, that's not very good acting! That's bad acting! You're overdoing it!" I felt like I would burst into tears. I blew this. I'm going home, is what I thought.

* * *

At home, I curled into a ball on the couch. I desperately wanted to call Alice, but she in a class right now. Brooke sat next to me. She didn't say anything; she just sat there next to me. Strangely enough, it was the comfort that I needed. I felt like I had let Alice down—she wanted this for me more than I wanted it for myself. When the next Tyra-Mail came, we all knew what it was about. Judging and Elimination was at 6:30 and we had to be ready by 6:15.

A bunch of girls ran around, straightening their hair, some were curling it. Almost everyone attacked themselves with more makeup. I got the nagging sense that a lot of them were going to be broken out in the morning. All I did was pull on my lucky jeans and a black and white striped baby doll top over them. This was probably my last night here; I might as well look cute. For shoes, I pulled out a pair of black satin pumps from my bag and slipped them on. I caught a glimpse of something Alice had snuck in my bag and laughed. She insisted that I bring her sex-kitten shoes. They were 6-inch platform heels that were supposed to be garnished with fishnet tights. Did I ever plan on wearing them? No. Could I even walk in them without killing myself three times over? No.

My hair was useless, so I pulled it into a round bun on the back of my head. For the most part, we all looked pretty decent for an elimination. We all walked into a room that I immediately knew as the judging room. A lot of things would happen in this place. Tyra was standing being a table. To her right, two swivel chairs were turned around and to her left, there was one that also faced the opposite direction.

"Good evening ladies!" Tyra said with a smile. "Welcome to the first judging and elimination round. Before we get started, I am very excited to introduce to you your fellow judges. To my right, we have the famous model, perhaps one of the greatest this world has seen, besides my self of course," Tyra winked, "Ms .Twiggy!"

Twiggy swiveled around in her chair and smiled at us. "Hello ladies," she said. Unlike my makeup artist, her accent was calming.

"Next, I would like to introduce to you the Queen of the Catwalk, the noted runway coach, Ms. J. Alexander!" J. swiveled around in his chair. He smiled.

"Halloo girls!" he smiled and flashed his teeth. We all knew that one was coming.

"Now, new to the judging panel, I would like to introduce to you a noted photographer and designer, Edward Masen!" The chair to her left spun around and my heart stopped. It all felt like a clench. This man was judging me? He was going to send me home? What was God doing to me? How could anyone be so beautiful and live to judge other people?

"Hi," he said politely. His voice was like velvet. Right now, all I hoped was that my face didn't look as bad as I felt. Tyra announced that the winner of the show would get a fashion spread in Elle Magazine and $100,000 contract with Cover Girl Cosmetics and then she sat down.

"Ladies, we want to see your walks, so please, walk forward," she said. Christian, who was standing first in line, walked forward. Her heels clacked against the floor and she spun once and walked back toward us. We all walked forward, flaunting our walks. I felt like throwing up—I couldn't walk in heels for my life. AJ walked before I did and then, it was all or nothing for me. I walked lightly, but maintained the motion I did when I walked during our first challenge. On my way back, I saw Brooke smile at me.

When it was all done, I looked up and fixed my gaze at Edward. His facial expression was blank. He didn't necessarily look bored, but he conveyed no emotion at all. Tyra called forward each model individually to assess our pictures. I blocked Tyra's voice out when she was assessing the others; I felt like I invading their privacy by listening. It must have been embarrassing for them. Then she called me forward.

"Bella." Tyra said. I walked forward and stood in the middle of the runway. "This is your best shot," she said, pointing to screen on the wall. I turned and saw a picture of today's photo shoot on a television that was mounted on the wall. After I swallowed hard, Tyra spoke. "This isn't a bad photo, Bella, but it isn't great." Twiggy spoke up.

"I think you were acting instead of modeling in this shoot," she said. I nodded.

"I think the only thing that's off with this photo is your facial expression. But, your facial expression reigns over most of the photo," Edward said. I froze; I wasn't expecting him to speak at all. Had he done that with the others?

"Thank you Bella," Tyra said, dismissing me. I nodded and walked away. I was so going home. Tyra asked us all to leave and we walking into a room where couches took up most of the space. All we did was sit there in silence.

**EPOV**

"Alight," Tyra said, spreading out all of the model's photos. "Michelle's photo is great, she did that really well."

"Absolutely," Twiggy agreed.

"She's funny," J. said. I smirked. The photo was quite comical, and yet, it had a serious aura about it.

"It's a good photo, she's obviously not going home," I said. Tyra put in inside of a folder.

"Now, CariDee, that's a classic dumb blonde photo right there," Tyra said. Twiggy scrunched up her eyebrows. "For a photo, you know what I mean," she said. Twiggy smiled and nodded her head.

"Alright, so she stays," J. said. I nodded my head in agreement. We continued through the photos until we came to the last two. Bella and Christian.

"Bella's not going," I said. "She had a better photo than Christian." I answered quickly.

"Yes, that's clear. At least Bella had a different range of poses, not just the same thing over and over again," J. said. He knew because he was there, but it was obvious in all over of Christian's photos.

"Bella has a nice walk too," Twiggy commented.

"She does, but she's a little shaky," Tyra said back. We all knew what the decision was.

* * *

When we called the girls back in, the all crowded on the steps. One by one, Tyra called the girls up, all of them exhaling in relief. When we got down to the last two, Bella and Christian stood there, both looking scared. There was something different in Bella's face though. Tyra asked them to step forward.

"Ladies, two of you stand before me and in my hands, I have only one photo." Tyra looked at Bella. "Bella, we see a young woman with great potential. But, we also see a young woman who doesn't seem to know the difference between acting and modeling." Tyra then turned to Christian.

"Christian, we see a young woman in you who doesn't really want to be a model. In your photos, we see the same thing over and over again." She paused and lifted out the photo.

"Bella. We know you have it in you to be great, but you need to find the difference between acting and modeling." Bella walked forward, her facial expression still not changing and she walked into the crowd of girls. In my opinion, she didn't need to be in the bottom two, all of that was just to scare her into being what she really is.

**AN: Hey guys, sorry this one took me a little bit longer to get out. Since I've got to go back to school tomorrow, things might be a little bit slow. Anyway, I promised you Edward would be in this chapter, and here he is!!!! I hope you guys like it Review and let me know what you think!**


	5. Chapter 5

BPOV

When I walked into the crowd of girls, I watched as Christian fell apart on the floor, sobbing. From the little I knew about her, this was her dream—everything that she did was in hopes of getting here. I couldn't help but feel that she was losing this chance because of me. If I hadn't gotten into this competition, then maybe Christian wouldn't be going home, maybe she would get the second chance that I'm getting right now.

Brooke squeezed my shoulder and sat next to me in the van back home. All of the girls were ecstatic—no one had really developed a relationship with Christian. Only I seemed to know how painful that was for her. When I made it to my bed, I flopped down with a sigh and pulled my phone out of the charger. A message flashed across the screen.

_Alice, _ was my first thought. When I pushed the call button, I was shocked almost beyond belief to hear Renee's voice.

"Bella, honey, It's mom. I know it's been a while, and we have a lot to catch up on, but I miss you. I want to know what's been going on in your life, I miss my baby girl. So, give me a call back soon and we'll catch up, alright? I love you.

My jaw hung open. This had to be a perk—Renee dropped me as soon as I stopped being a fun little kid. The first thing I did was call Alice. She answered after the first few rings and sounded half-dead.

"Alice, did you tell my mom that I was on the show?" I asked immediately.

"Yeah, I did," she mumbled. "Can I go back to sleep?" In the background, I heard a deep grumble.

"Sure. Tell Japer I say hi when you get back up," I answered, then shut the phone. I knew it—my mom decides to be a part of my life again because of this stupid show. The only part I didn't understand was why. Was it because of the publicity? Or was it because of the reminder that she had a daughter? Whatever it was, I decided that her return phone call would have to wait; it was almost ten o'clock in Phoenix.

Jaeda and Megan ran into the room and pulled apart a few beds and tore the mattresses off of the frames. What on earth? Seconds later, girls were squealing and laughing. When I walked out of the room, the girls were pretty much jumping down the stairs and onto a pile of mattresses.

"Bella! Come do this! It's so much fun!" One of the twins shouted at me before jumping off of the stairs. I sighed and walked forward.

"I think I'll pass," I said.

"No. Don't even think about it!" One of them shouted and laughed. "Come on!" Brooke came out of nowhere and dragged me up the steps.

"Ready?" she asked. "One, two, go!" And then Brooke pushed me. I went tumbling down the mattresses that lined the stairs and was lucky enough to just hit my head on the banister. "Oh god! I'm so sorry!" Brooke almost screamed, running after me. I sat up in a daze and rubbed at my head. Thankfully I wasn't bleeding.

"I really didn't mean for that to happen Bella, seriously, I'm so sorry!" Brooke apologized. 

"Oh, don't worry about it," I mumbled, trying to get past the thudding over my right temple. "Go have fun, I'm just going to go ice this." I smiled at her and stood shakily to walk to the kitchen. My head throbbed and truthfully, it was a little bit hard to walk straight.

In the freezer, I grabbed an ice tray and dumped several cubes into a zip-bloc bag. After wrapping the bag in a hand towel, I pressed the ice against my temple lightly and put the ice back in the freezer. With a sigh, I leaned against the counter and waited for the cold to numb my skin. It happened sooner than I expected, but the thudding pain didn't go away. If this bruised, chances were, my lovely makeup artist would scream at me with his thick accent and scare me even more than he did already.

Half of my head was almost completely numb, but I refused to take the ice off. The cold was making me incredibly tired too, and I couldn't help but yawn a few times while standing against the counter. Thinking about my current mood, I shuffled into the bedroom and dug out my pajamas one-handedly.

I set the ice down and got dressed as quickly as I could and replaced the ice back on my face. As soon as I was fully dressed, my mood changed drastically. I was almost euphoric—flannel pajamas were always comforting to me. Yet, as soon as I walked out of the room, the ice packed still pressed against my face, my euphoria vanished and morphed into horror, then to fear, then to something that I had never really felt before. Standing in front of me, in all his glory, was Edward Masen.

EPOV

On the way back to our hotel, Tyra sat next to me in the car while Twiggy and J. chattered animatedly about the photos.

"So, how was that?" she asked me.

"It was interesting," I answered truthfully. Her personality seemed a little bit off, but I got the sense that it was because she just sent someone home. "Are you doing okay?" I asked. I honestly felt bad for Tyra—this is what she would have to do every time at a panel, and it would only get harder.

"Yeah, I'm fine," she answered with a small smile. "I want you to do something," she said after a small pause.

"Alright," I said, hesitantly.

"After tonight, I can already tell that things are going to be really hard between the contestants. It's usually much easier to tell who really wants to be here and who doesn't. What I want you to do is just talk to them. I want you to kind of get to know them, be there friend in a way," she said. I was taken aback. To me, this was absolutely ridiculous.

"Are you sure I'm the right one for that?" I asked, hoping that she would say no and decide to and Jay for even J. to do it.

"Yes, I'm sure. You may be the only guy here who's not gay, but you aren't any less sensitive than they are, we both know that," she said. I almost blushed as she said that. I was sensitive?

"Alright, if that's what you want me to do," I said. "That's not going to be on camera, is it?"

"Nah, I'm going to have the produces edit that kind of stuff out," she said and then put her head on my shoulder. Apparently, Tyra was tired. After the others were all in their rooms, I checked the clock. 9:20. Now would be a pretty good time for me to go and talk to them.

As the taxi drove me to the house, I wracked my brain for things to say to the girls—ways to come off as inconspicuous and friendly, but not too friendly. I'm sure they could figure out that I wasn't gay and I really didn't want to put any ideas in their heads. Quietly, I walked up to the front door and stuck my copy of the key in the door.

When I walked into the house, I could hear girls laughing and shouting with one another. Through the hallways, the girls voice's echoed off of the walls. Bella came walking out a room and I almost stopped in my tracks. There she stood, with an ice pack pressed against her head and in flannel pajamas. In the smallest corner of my mind, I though about how I was supposed to talk to her, but the rest of mine was occupied with how beautiful she was.


	6. Chapter 6

**BPOV**

My stomach literally dropped. If I felt like using a hilariously cheesy line from a movie, then I would say that my stomach felt like it was going to fly out of my butt. Edward Masen—standing in front of me in all his glory and looking too beautiful and perfect to be human. Quickly, I looked down at my ensemble of flannel pajamas. I didn't look bad necessarily, just unfit to be in the presence of any inhumanly gorgeous god. When I realized how terrible it must have looked with my clothes and the giant ice pack on my head, my cheeks flared and a blush crept down my face.

Childishly, I waited for him to say something. All that he was doing was standing there, staring at me. I couldn't make his emotions out—his eyes were completely unreadable. But I got the sense that on the inside, he was busting up laughing. After my shabby performance tonight, top it off with this lovely entourage and who wouldn't be laughing? Finally, he said something.

"Hi Bella," he said softly. I breathed out quickly.

"Uh…hi." My delayed answer only sent another swarm of blood rushing to my cheeks. I stared at him awkwardly, waiting for something to happen. Honestly, I didn't know what to do. Why was he even here?

"Can I ask what happened to your head?" He asked after a few more seconds of silence. How was I supposed to word this one? No one on this show was supposed to know that I'm a klutz. Thinking quickly, I told him the worst white lie I could come up with.

"Oh, when we were coming home, someone ran a red light and the driver slammed on the breaks. I hit my head on the window." He might have bought that if my voice didn't shake half as much as it did. Edward raised an eyebrow and his face pulled up into a smile.

"Really?" He asked. My shoulders sagged and I sighed in defeat.

"Does it really matter what happened to my head?" He shrugged and pursed his lips as if debating what to say.

"Well, no. But I would like to know anyway," he answered. How was he doing this? It was almost as if he was dazzling me and stealing my oxygen. I found it impossible to even come up with a cover story.

"I…don't…know," I finally got out. His face returned to the impassive expression that I was used to.

"Okay then. Are you going to be alright at least?" Edward's eyes sucked me in. This was impossible. I knew immediately that the next judging panel would be hell. After taking a deep breath, I answered,

"I think so." He smiled lightly.

"Good. So, would you like to go for a walk?" he asked. What was this? And was I really in any shape for a walk right now? With my pajamas on and an ice pack, I might as well have gone to the circus and gotten a job.

"Sure," I said shakily, walking forward slowly. My mind literally felt like it would split me in half. On one hand, I desperately wanted to walk with him. I couldn't shake the desire that I had to reach out and simply touch his face. On the other, my insides were screaming and ripping themselves apart. This was Edward Masen, a famous big shot in the fashion industry. Why would a guy like him want anything to do with a girl like me? The opposing side of my mind sent messages of warning my way. I honestly believed that this was all a small path that would lead to road of hurt and embarrassment.

**EPOV**

"Can I ask what happened to your head?" I asked, almost too curious as to what had happened. Bella's facial expression changed. I found it utterly amazing, yet incredibly frustrating. I had always been good with reading people's facial expressions, but now, it was like a wall.

Bella launched into an explanation about the van coming to a sudden stop and her hitting her head on the window. I knew enough to know that for a bump like that, she needed to have hit the window extremely hard. Hard enough to break the glass. Aside from that perk in her story, I might have believed it if her voice didn't shake so much. This was L.A., it was never a surprise when someone ran a red light—we were all too much in a hurry to even notice it half of the time.

"Really?" I asked her. I couldn't help but smile, her face looked priceless. My smile was that of humor, but also of confusion. Why would she cover up anything? It's not like she was a criminal—we all knew that from the extensive background checks we ran on all of the contestants. Bella's whole stature shrank. Her shoulders sagged and her eyes closed for longer than a blink.

"Does it really matter?" she asked me. In my mind, I answered differently—of course it does, you could be hurt.

"Well, no, "I answered out loud. "But I would like to know." This whole 'be their friend' thing was much harder than I anticipated it would be, and I had only been doing this for about five minutes. Bella's answer was something that I had really never dealt with before. How could anyone not know how they got an extreme bump/gash on their head? "Are you going to be alright at least?"

Finally, Bella's answer calmed me. She didn't set down the ice pack as we walked out the door. She hesitantly stepped in front of me and made it outside before I did. Everything about her was hesitant, I had noticed. Her answers were hesitant, her facial expressions were hesitant, and as hard as it may be to comprehend, her stumble was slightly hesitant. Her walk was unlike anything I had seen before—with a little bit of training, she would be great. Normally, it was more like a trippy…swagger I guess you could say. She definitely wasn't flat footed; there were no Fred Flinstone feet on her. As for some of the other models…

She didn't say anything while we walked. I only allowed the silence for a few minutes. "So," I said, opening the door for conversation. "Where are you from?" She closed her eyes for a few seconds.

"I'm from Phoenix," she answered. I could hear the pitter-patter of her bare feet on the ground. I looked at her and took in her beautifully pale skin. Skin that really didn't belong in Phoenix.

"You have beautiful skin," I said, without thinking. She looked at me fully for the first time.

"Excuse me?" she asked politely. Normally, when someone says that, the words behold shock and just a pissed off attitude. I couldn't depict what was going through her head from the tone of her voice.

"Your skin, it's beautiful. I don't mean to stereotype, but with a lot of girls who come from desert states, they have unnaturally tanned skin. You don't," I answered, trying to figure out a better way to fix what I had just said.

"Oh, well, thanks" Bella answered quietly. "Can I ask you something?" she asked. Mentally, I whooped with joy. Finally she was willingly talking to me.

"Anything," I answered. She took in a breath.

"Why are you here?" That question floored me. At first, I though she was saying that because she was irritated with me, but then I remembered that everything about Bella was different than it seemed.

"I just wanted to get to know you girls, and I figured I might start with you," I answered, as honestly as I could. The only person that I had any desire to get to know was Bella. To be quite frank, a lot of the girls scared me. Their attitudes screamed 'I want you' at me. Bella nodded and didn't say anything after that.

"What's life like at home?" I asked, literally reaching into the air and pulling out subjects to talk about.

"Life at home?" she asked. I nodded. "Well, I live with my best friend, Alice. We both go to College together. She's my life crutch I guess you could say. Alice is…the most hyper adult you will ever meet. What's odd is that she can just switch it on and off. When she's with me or her boyfriend or any other friends, Alice is like a helium balloon. In class, in the real world, she is amazingly brilliant and though at times irresponsible, she makes life seem so much different than it really is." I was shocked at her devotion towards Alice. It was almost as if she were talking about a family member, a lifesaver, a hero of some sort. What struck me as odd was that she didn't mention parents in that scenario.

"What about your parents?" I asked. Then I realized that parents might be a sore subject. Oops.

"My dad lives in Washington. He's a police officer. My mom lives in Florida. She just got remarried and she's piecing her life back together, reevaluating things, I guess you could say," she said. Then, she shocked me. "What about you? What's your home life like?" I almost stuttered, trying to come up with something to say. Of all the women I had spoken to, no on had really asked me about my self or my life. Tyra did on occasion, but the fact that we are at least ten years apart could have something to do with it.

**BPOV**

I watched as Edward tried to come up with something to say. A few minutes ago, I took the ice pack down from my face. While Edward stood there, I leaned over and dumped the ice from the pack into the bushes. My feet felt like they were frozen, and I knew that walking barefoot, especially with my luck, was probably dangerous.

"Well," Edward started to answer. "My parent's live in New York, not too far from my home. My father, Carlisle, is a doctor and my mother, Esme, is a home restoration agent. I don't live with anyone and I make my living by photographing models and helping design photo shoots." I nodded and we continued to walk. His life sounded like one that required much thought and patience. Unconsciously, I shivered.

"Are you cold?" he asked me. Honestly, I missed the blazing heat and clear skies. So much, it almost made me cry, and it hadn't even been five days.

"Yeah, I'm not used to the weather here," I answered, sidestepping what I really felt. I'm not used to the weather and I never will be. Edward nodded his head back toward the house and we turned around, walking back the way we came.

"I have a question," Edward said suddenly. I looked up at him, curious as to what he might want to ask me. It was nice how he asked before trying to get any personal information out of me.

"Alright," I said, waiting for my brain to start scrambling for an answer.

"What happened in the photo shoot?" Mentally I was stuttering. How was I supposed to answer this? Well, I could have just put everything bluntly and said that I can't model or act, but seeing as how Edward was a judge, I couldn't really say that.

"Don't you already know?" I finally got out. The judges knew everything didn't they? This was probably just a trick question. When I looked over, Edward's eyes were sincere and he shook his head from side to side.

"No, I don't," he answered. I bit down hard, pressing my teeth together.

"I was late to the shoot, and when it got there, I couldn't do it." Edward looked at me fully and tilted his head lightly. His expressions made me incredibly confused. I didn't how to respond to his reactions in the least.

"What do mean you couldn't do it?" He asked gently. His voice was so alluring, almost supernatural.

"Edward, you heard what Tyra said at eliminations, didn't you?" I asked, not trying to sound offensive, or defensive for that matter. He closed his eyes slowly and nodded.

"I did."

"Well, then you know. I need to sort between the acting and the modeling and get straight to the modeling. Obviously it's bad enough to get me eliminated, so I need to work on it." Edward reached out and put his hand on my shoulder lightly. Sparks flew through my skin and I couldn't understand why. _This is just an ordinary guy. You shouldn't let him do this to you, grow up a little, _I told my self over and over again.

"Bella, you're going to be great," Edward said, almost enunciating every syllable. I looked away and we walked to the door. "Well, I'd better get going," he said before I walked in. I looked behind my shoulder and smiled lightly at him.

"Goodnight Edward." He smiled.

"Sweet dreams Bella."

* * *

When I walked in the house, some of the girls were still cheering around and going nuts over nothing. They were all euphoric having made it past the first round. I shook my head and walked into the room. After swallowing more advil than I needed to, I passed out. Only 45 minutes after me sleeping, I woke up to an even louder round of squealing. These girls were hyped on something.

I groaned and shuffled out of the room. Brooke skipped over to me with Anchal. "Bella, we're going to breakfast in the morning," she said happily. I smiled and tried to join in on her excitement. Anchal looked at me closely.

"Bella, are you okay?" she asked. I reached up and felt my head making checking for a lump of some sort.

"Yeah, I'm fine. My head just hurts," I answered. Brooke's eye widened.

"Oh my god, I didn't even see that! Bella, I'm so sorry, that was stupid of me, I shouldn't have pushed you." Brooke apologized yet again. I smiled at her.

"I told you not to worry about it, I'm fine." After a few more minutes of standing around, I shuffled back into the room and passed out, waking up to my alarm clock.

**AN: Hi! Sorry this update took so long...I had some big projects for school and I've been studying for midterms. Bleh. I realize I made Edward have just about all of the same qualities that he does as a vampire, but take into consideration the fact that Edward's personality and character wasn't much different when before Carlisle changed him. And if anyone's wondering if they like eachother for real...you could just ask me, but I ain't saying it here P**


	7. Chapter 7

**Here's one that's a little bit longer for you guys. Enjoy:)**

**BPOV **

When I woke up the morning, sure enough, there was a giant bruise on my head. Brooke took one look at me, and tears welled up in her eyes.

"I did that to you! Oh my god! Bella, I'm so, so, sorry!" I looked her straight on and rolled my eyes in a way that she would catch.

"For the last time Brooke, stop apologizing." Her face softened when she took in my tone. I honestly didn't care that she pushed me because I knew the bruise would have gotten there one way or another. Brooke stood next to me while I dug through my suitcase for some clothes. When I pulled out a pair of jeans, she made a small noise.

"Are those true religions?" she asked. I nodded, embarrassed that she had noticed. I wasn't made of money—Alice was big on designer clothes and just happened to love window-shopping for other people. "They put my Levi's to shame…,"she muttered, walking away. After that, I was even more self-conscious about getting dressed, so I stood behind my bed and pulled on my pants. As for a top, I slipped on a white t-shirt and pulled a black cardigan over it. Once again, I settled on putting my hair in a bun and pulled on a pair of black and white polka-dot flats.

In the car, I started wondering about how bad my bruise really was, so I asked the one person whom I knew I would a get an honest answer out of. "Hey Monique?"

Monique looked up at me, still half-asleep. "Hmm?" she answered.

"Is the bruise on my head really noticeable?" I asked. She leaned closer and narrowed her eyes.

"Uh, yeah, it kind of is…how did you do that?" she asked.

"I fell last night," I said quietly. She shrugged and rested her head on the window. The van pulled up to a small restaurant. All of us piled out and walked into the building. A kind-looking waitress stood at a podium.

"Good morning ladies! Welcome to Sunset Boulevard! If you will wait for one moment, I'll be back with your waitress," she said with a smile. I noticed that her badge said 'Angela'. A few of the girls sat down in the available chairs. I stood and like Angela had promised, she returned in a few minutes…with J. hooked to her arm.

"Hello ladies! Isn't a glorious morning!" he said. We all smiled and laughed. Angela's face was beaming. As we walked past her, I thanked her. J. led us to a giant table where Jay also sat at the tables, hiding partially behind a menu. All-in-all, the breakfast meeting was pretty nice. We talked and ate at the same time, some of the girls completely forgetting their manners.

What threw the meal out the window was when Jaeda voiced one solitary word: makeover. For years, I had been subjected to Alice's torturous makeover sessions. Thankfully, though she pushed them to the extreme, she knew my limits. If this 'makeover' was to be anything like my last experience with a makeup artist, then kill me now.

I noticed how J.'s face twitched slightly as she said that. That gesture alone was enough to make my hands start to sweat. On the way home, my insides quaked a little bit too much. And they just about exploded when we walked in the door to the house. The whole downstairs had been transformed into a salon.

Tyra jumped out of thin air and a round of cheers erupted. "Yes ladies! It's time for makeovers! Allow me to introduce your stylist, Frederic Fekkai!" she shouted. After everyone calmed down, Tyra lined us up and started giving out our new looks. She took out a giant drawing pad and talked quietly with Amanda. Amanda's face lit up and she walked off to get whatever work Tyra had planned for her done.

One by one, she showed each girl a different drawing. All I could do was stand there and will my knees not to give out. Finally, she came over to me. On the drawing pad was a sketch of my face. My hair was drawn in delicate layers and the color was extremely vibrant. Mentally, I doubted that any of that would be possible. "Okay Bella, all they are doing to the color is glazing it. And we're doing the long layers." I blinked a few times.

"That's all?"

"Yes, dear, that's all," she said with a smile. "You have a colorist, and Mr. Fekkai will fix you up with some layers." My colorist, an older blond lady led me to a wash station and shampooed and conditioned my hair. After applying this gloppy stuff all over my head, she stuck me under a dryer. When she rinsed my hair out, she led me to a different chair and I felt a different pair of hands handling my hair.

"Hello there," a deep male voice said. I was slightly startled.

"Oh, hi," I said quietly. He laughed lightly and began combing out my hair. He ran his fingers through it several times before I head the infamous snipping sound that makes your heart want to ram out of your chest. I didn't do so well with change.

"Alright Bella, we're going to blow dry your hair now. I think you're going to love this," he said. He pulled out a round brush and drier and began drying my hair. Ten minutes later, he turned my chair around so I face the mirror.

My hair shone like I had never seen it shine before. "Did you put anything in it?" I asked, astonished. Frederic smiled.

"Nothing at all! That's all you," he said. I ran my fingers through my hair and instantly fell in love with it. It felt amazing. Not only that, but this guy knew the right things to say.

"Thank you!" I said smiling. He rubbed my shoulder quickly and left to work on someone else's hair. When the initial shock of change wore off, I took the time to look around me.

Jaeda, of all people, was sobbing. "No! My hair! I want it back!" she sobbed. Frederic looked horrified and I felt a small pang in my chest for him. This guy knew what he was doing, and in my opinion, Jaeda's hair looked better now. . A few other girls looked scared. By noon, all of us were officially 'new'. Jaeda still hadn't stopped crying, and not only that, but Tyra was pissed. On top of all the drama, Monique didn't like her hair too much either—there wasn't enough change to it—and Jay stepped in to put the girls in their places. Tonight would be fun dealing with them.

"Look at you!" I said as Brooke came toward me smiling. "Your hair looks great!" Her hair, which used to be an adorable shade a blond, was now a dark brown color. She smiled and raised her eyebrows.

"Your hair is so…shiny," she said with a laugh. "And soft!" she said after running her hand along it. Tyra then introduced our challenge. By running through a series of floors, we were supposed to somehow complete our makeovers. That one went surprisingly well for me—I only twisted my ankle once. However, seeing as how this whole 'makeover run' thing was timed, I failed miserably on that part and Eugena ended up winning the challenge. She would be taking two others to go meet Queen Latifah. I congratulated her but silently thanked the heavens that I didn't win—I still wasn't over the fact that I won the last one.

* * *

Before we left the challenge building, Tyra came over to me. "Bella, what happened to your head?" she asked.

"Oh…I fell," I said. She raised an eyebrow at me and shook her head lightly.

"It looks painful."

"Yeah, it is," I admitted.

"Well, be sure to get some rest. That might be able to be covered up with makeup, but it won't mean anything if you can't walk straight!" she joked. What did that mean? Was I not walking straight? "So, how bad is your headache?" By now, I desperately wanted to run away from Tyra and go hide in the van.

"Uh…It's not all that bad," I said slowly. She blinked slowly.

"That bad huh?" This woman didn't know when to stop. She leaned in closer. "Bella, your eyes look a little bit funny—how much advil did you take?" How did she know I took advil? It's not like it's written on my forehead!

"I…don't…remember. I took some really early this morning," I answered honestly—though I knew I had taken more than 900 mgs, which wasn't exactly healthy. Tyra kept her eyes on me and turned her head slightly.

"Hey Jay!" she shouted across the room. He came over smiling.

"Yes Tyra?" he asked. She nodded toward me and honestly, I felt like I was being interrogated. Maybe they thought I was doing drugs? He looked and me and winced when he saw my bruise. Jay stepped closer and looked at my eyes.

"Bella, I think you might have a concussion," he said slowly. "Have you been feeling okay?"

"I have a slight headache, but it might be because of the fumes from just getting my hair done," I said. I'd hit my head plenty of times and I'd had my share of concussions—this was nothing.

"Alright, well, if you start feeling weird, tell one of the camera men, or call one of us, okay?" he said gently. I nodded and turned to walk away. "I mean that Bella!" he called after me. The girls were waiting in the van already, and only a select few were irritated.

"Took you long enough," Monique snarled. I looked down and found a seat next to Amanda. It was easy to tell the difference between the twins now- Amanda was literally a red head, while Michelle's hair was more orange. When we got home, just as I expected, there was hell to pay.

Monique marched right into the phone room and sat on the phone. For three hours.

Within the first hours, she had not only earned herself the title of "house bitch", but she had also tried to bite off a few of the girls' heads. She was not only angry about her hair, but she was also angry because of the fact that she was eliminated from the challenge. Most of the girls spent the night trying to get her out of there. Some, like CariDee for example, went to the extremes of flashing her. All of the drama reminded me of something that I needed to do. With a sigh, I pulled my phone out of the charger and got ready to make two phone calls.

Renee answered after the first three rings. "Hello?" she asked, sounding a little bit too happy.

"Mom?" I asked, hoping that I wasn't interrupting anything.

"Bella! Hi honey, how are you?" she half-shouted into the phone.

"I'm fine mom, how are you?"

"I'm great honey, Phil is wonderful. We really miss you, you know that right?"

"Uh, I miss you too," I said. The rest of the conversation was filled with my mom serenading about me being on the show. Surprisingly, I wasn't upset about it. It was nice to hear my mom's voice and to know that I might be her fun-filled daughter again. Our conversation only lasted a few minutes and ended with and 'I love you' and 'I'll call you soon'.

Alice's phone call went a little bit different.

"You told Renee?" I asked as soon as she picked up the phone.

"I miss you too Bella," she replied.

"Alice, did you know that my mom called me?"

"No…and I only told her because I needed help cooking something, so I called her and asked for help because you weren't answering your phone! Then she asked about you and I couldn't exactly lie! So don't be pissed at me, it's your fault. Your mom found out because you didn't teach me how to cook and because you didn't answer your phone," Alice said. I laughed lightly.

"Alice, I'm not mad at you. It's only a little bit disappointing that she suddenly wants to be a part of my life because of the show. Maybe now we can fix things." When Alice asked about what was happening with everything else, I didn't really say much. By the end of the conversation, Alice didn't even know about my hair. Not much had happened to it anyway, it only looked healthier and shinier.

Without bothering to take anymore advil, I crawled into bed and fell asleep just after Monique started screaming at another girl. Brooke woke me up the next morning. My alarm clock read 6:30. No one else was up.

"Sorry," she whispered. "They're gonna be getting up in a few minutes, so I figured I might get you up; you didn't set your alarm last night." I thanked her and hurried into an empty shower. The whole air of the house screamed 'hormonal women: BEWARE'.

At the photo shoot, Tyra showed up, completely adorned with an exotic looking wig of some sort. "Good morning ladies!" she said happily, eyeing me especially. Yep, they definitely think I'm doing drugs. "For today's shoot, your hair is once again going to be styled. Today, it will be specially done by weavologists! Your challenge is to be able to shine through your hair and not the let the wig overpower you. Own the wig, don't let the wig own you. Best of luck!" As expected, Tyra pranced of the stage. We all went to our stations.

An exotic looking woman led me to a small makeup station and began to doll my face up. The pain was almost overwhelming as she packed on the foundation over my forehead. I didn't even get a chance to look at myself before my hair stylist called me to his station.

The first thing that my stylist did was slip a polyester cap over my head. Then, he began to weave bright strands of straw through the fabric. After the first half of an hour, he had attached several strands for a first layer. After three layers, he began to build up. As the hair heightened, so did the weight of it all. My shoulders soon began to ache.

"Is this going to collapse?" I finally asked. The stylist laughed. His voice was warm.

"No dear, it won't collapse until I take it off of your head. Just be careful, because I know this is getting heavy," he advised. I nodded my head slightly and after another twenty minutes, he finished and a group of women took me behind a screen to create an outfit for me. Like the first layers of my hair, they attached the bright colors over my chest so it hung like a…rainbow waterfall, for lack of better words.

After meeting with the photographer, I took the extra minute and cleared my head completely. Jay stood next to the photographer. It was obvious that I took Jay by surprised when I literally spread myself apart. Angling my body, I though of one thing that helped me pull it off. Edward. I don't know why I did it, but I thought of our talk and something just came to me—it felt like I was in a dream that I knew couldn't be real, and I was upset that it wasn't.

Jay actually pulled me into a hug. "Where did that come from?" he asked into my ear. "Maybe you should hit your head more often!" For the first time, someone's joke at my clumsiness made my day. At the house, Brooke, the twins, Anchal and I hung out in the Jacuzzi. We were all almost euphoric from the shoot, but I only stayed in for a few minutes because my head started to hurt.

After I pulled on a large t-shirt and some shorts, I shuffled into the kitchen and found the advil. This should have been better by now—I didn't hit my head that hard. Behind, me I heard a small noise. When I turned around, there was a small envelope on the table. _**Bella**_ was written on the cover in an elegant scrawl.

There was no around me, so I figured it safe to open it. Sitting against the island in the kitchen, I slid my finger under the seal. Inside, a small piece of paper was folded. _**Sweet dreams. Be safe.**_

In my mind, I was almost going into hysterics. What the hell was this? Should I tell the producers that there's some creep sending me stalkerish letters? "Bella?" I heard someone call my name. I quickly shoved the note back in the envelope and stood up.

"Coming!" I called back. Outside, Brooke noticed I had been gone for a while. I sat in a chair and talked with them for the rest of the night. After receiving the Tyra Mail, most of us went to bed. After today, we were all pretty drained.

* * *

**EPOV**

Tyra called my cell phone as soon as I got into the taxi.

"Hello?" I asked into the phone.

"Hey!" Tyra said. "I noticed that you're gone and I know it's really none of my business, but I wanted to know if you went to see the girls."

"Yeah, I did," I answered wearily.

"So how did it go?" She was excited. My mind blurred. The butterflies that decided to move into my stomach still hadn't settled down completely, and I knew that Tyra would get the wrong idea if I told what had really happened.

"I didn't get a chance to really talk to anyone. I don't think anyone noticed I was there; the girls were just having fun with each other," I answered.

"Oh, that's good though! At least we don't have a total bitch house," she laughed.

"Yeah," I said, not really paying attention. My mind kept drifting to Bella. Her walk, her voice, her face, her bruise…

"Edward?" Tyra asked. "You there?"

"I'm pulling up to the hotel right now, I'll be there in a few minutes," I said quickly. When she hung up, I sat back and let the rest of my mind catch up with my body. My mind was still stuck at the house. It was still stuck on the bushes where Bella dumped out her ice pack. It was still stuck on her laugh. What scared me the most was that I didn't know why I kept thinking about her. Bella is just a girl, the only difference between her and the others is she's not…well, I didn't really know what it was, but it scared me.

**BPOV**

In the morning, we all got as dressed up as possible could and made it to judging and eliminations. As soon as we walked into the room, my eyes locked with Edward. It was like a gravitational pull and I fought against it relentlessly until I won and was able to look at the floor. Tyra went through the normal introduction of the judges, also introducing our photographer, Tracy Byrne. My stomach dropped when I was called out first.

I walked forward with a fake smile plastered onto my face. "Wow Bella, you're hair looks amazing!" Tyra said. We all knew she had seen it, but the viewers wouldn't have known that. My interrogation happened while the cameras were on a lunch break.

"Show us what you've got!" J. said. I ran my fingers through it and flipped my layers forward. I refused to look at Edward.

"Alright, lets look at your photo," Tyra said. My picture appeared on the TV that was mounted on the wall.

"Wow," Twiggy broke in. "You body is positioned in a way that makes your face look…wow."

"I totally 100 agree, you've definitely made up for last week," J. said. I smiled and looked down at the floor.

"Don't be shy missy! This is an amazing picture! Smile, no modesty allowed!" Tyra said playfully. I laughed.

"Honestly Bella, this is a great picture. It was definitely easy to work with you!" Tracy said with a smile. I nodded and thanked her.

"It's a great photo; your facial expression and your body position as well as language tops it all off. Amazing job, Bella," Edward said. My gut twisted and I plastered on my smile and walked back. The rest of the judging was a blur. It was incredibly hard not to stare at him, but I did it.

Finally came the eliminations. I knew I was safe by what they told me in the first place. I was safe first, and Anchal came right after me. In the end, it narrowed down to Jaeda and Megan. In my mind, I was thinking that it would be Jaeda to leave—Megan had been through a lot, the judges had to go easy on her, and Jaeda's hair issues was getting on all of our nerves. I was completely taken by surprise when they called Jaeda's name, leaving Megan to go home. We were all in shock, but then again, everything happens for a reason.

**AN: Hey guys. Okay, so, as the usual goes, if you have any questions, just ask me. Though I must warn you, some of them I don't answer because they will give away some things.**

**Also, I want to change the name of the story, but I want some help from you guys! So give me some ideas.**

**All of you guys that write fanfics on here know that reviews make us feel special. So, to those of you who actually take the time to review, thank you. To those of you who don't, that's okay. Yeah, it kinda bums me out sometimes, but hey, at least your reading the story, so thank you for that!**


	8. Chapter 8

Hey Guys

Don't worry, there's a chapter coming out right after this, but I figured you would actually look at the next chapter after reading this.

Okay, I decided on a new name. Really, I felt that this one was too obvious. I know that sounds weird, but everyone who sees the name is going to know what it is…and I don't necessarily like that. Then there's no adventure to reading it.

I sound mental don't I?

Anywhoo…

Here's to you xoxMidnight-Sunxox. Though you might not realize it, you did help me figure out the new name.

It's gonna be called……drumroll... jk

**'A Trip for a Walk'**

So, when you see the little 'New Chapter' update thingy, but it doesn't say** 'Twilight's Next Top Model'**, now you know!

Oh, and if by chance the name of this chapter changes when I change the title of the story...sorry. At least I tried to warn you , right?


	9. Chapter 9

**BPOV**

The ride home killed me. That one glimpse of Edward was enough to send me over the edge. My heart pounded in my chest hard enough to affect my breathing. Mentally, I was beating myself up three times over. I had never even thought about anyone that way; I was saving myself from the pain of rejection and humiliation.

Besides that, Edward Masen is a famous photographer, going even further up in the ranks for being a judge on this show. I was sure that there were several girls, and in certain cases guys, out there with pictures of him plastered all over their bedroom walls. All of us were surprised at Megan's leaving. A lot of us had gotten close with her, especially the twins.

"She had such a great personality," Michelle had mumbled in the car. "I can't believe she's gone." You could see it in both Michelle and Amanda's eyes that they didn't want her to go. I'm sure we were all on the same page about whom we wanted gone. It wasn't a surprise to find AJ crying shortly after we got home.

While a few of the girls mumbled about Megan, my mind drifted in waves to Edward sitting at the judging table. His expression, the one that I had allowed myself to see, was the same impassive look that I was used to by now. At the house, I immediately pulled on a pair of sweats and a cotton t-shirt. Right now, the whole mood of the house had shifted. To some, Megan going was a good thing—there was less competition for them now.

I had a few messages on my phone, but I was too drained to actually listen to them. Sitting on an empty sofa, I curled up with a book that Alice shoved in my bag. _Perfume?_ I thought, flipping over the back. Apparently this book was about an man whose sense of smell drove him to an obsession with a young woman that eventually lead to murder. Rolling my eyes, I flipped oven the cover page and tried desperately to get into the book. Alice had such an odd taste in things. After the first few sentences that entailed nothing but information on the putrid smells of the streets of Paris, I heard a noise.

It wasn't much of a noise, just a small click, but it was enough to tear my limited attention away from the book. When I looked up, Standing in front of me was Edward. My heart lodged in my throat and, though I tried not to, I started to choke. It's one thing to choke on something that you're eating or drinking; that's understandable. When you choke on your own spit, that's just embarrassing. Especially when it's in front of someone as beautiful as Edward Masen.

Edward was at my side in a second, shaking my shoulders as I tried to get in some amount of air. "Bella? Breath!" He commanded. It didn't work. The sound of his voice only sent me into further hysterics and tears began to pour out of my eyes.

"Did you swallow something!?" he asked, almost in as much shock as I was. I shook my head 'no', still struggling to breathe. Edward sighed, and hesitantly patted my back. His touch sent shocks flying through my entire body. Once again, Edward patted my back, but then he huffed and yanked me off of the couch. The sudden movement opened up my airways and I took in a huge breath.

"Thank god," he muttered. Gently, he sat me back down and I proceeded to take deep breaths.

"Oh god…I'm sorry…Edward," I got out. He shook his head.

"No, don't worry about it, I'm just glad that you're okay." He looked at me and chuckled. My eyes widened as I took in what was happening; he was laughing at me. Just great.

"Right, I'll just be going now," I sighed, getting up from the couch.

"Bella," he said. I could still hear the amusement in his voice. "Please don't leave." I stopped and turned around to face him.

"You're laughing at me Edward, I really don't have much of an incentive to stay." Those words were a lie, but I needed some excuse to leave.

"Laughing at you? No, I'm not laughing at you in the least," he explained. "I came here to ask if you would take another walk with me. Maybe on the way I can explain what I found to be humorous?" My chest thudded again and I was sure he would be able to see it. I could feel it, which was for sure.

"Uh, really?" I asked, astonished. Edward wanted to take another walk with me?

"Yes, really," he said, a small smile playing at his lips. It was the eyes again. They reeled me in like I was caught on a line of some sort. His eyes, topped of with his smile, were like a magnet, and I was a helpless piece of metal. Even walking towards him proved to be a challenge.

Outside, the crisp air stung my skin. Gritting my teeth, I walked next to him in silence for a few seconds. He broke it in. "Your photo was amazing." His voice was like velvet—a heat supply against the frigid air. He may have been used to the weather, or so it seemed, but I wasn't even close.

"Oh, thanks." There was that awkward silence again… "I had to make up for last week," I added with a small smile. It hurt, smiling; it felt like my face was stuck in a mold of plaster.

"Well, honestly, I didn't think there was much to work on in your last photo. For a first photo, it was pretty good and…I really shouldn't have said that," he muttered. Apparently, he didn't think I had heard that. It became obvious that I did when I bit my lip and looked down.

"Why?" I whispered.

"Bella, it's not what it sounds like. Honestly, this is no reflection upon you. It's…it's hard to explain," he said. Before he could struggle to get any more words out, I interrupted him.

"So tell me, what did you find so humorous back inside?" This was a judge. No matter how upset I might get with his words, I couldn't let myself show it. Edward cleared his throat and the look of confusion on his face was replaced with that same small smile.

"Well, it's just that, I found it funny that as soon as I walked in the room, you started doing…whatever you were doing. I've never had that exact affect on someone," he said. I couldn't help but blush at that.

"Egotistical are we?" I asked. "And it was choking," I corrected. He started laughing and naturally, my laughter carried along with his.

"I was only joking," he clarified. "I didn't necessarily find it funny that you were choking. I didn't at all, in fact, it scared me. I don't know why I was smiling." I blinked a few times, trying to comprehend what he just said.

"Humor me," I muttered. He sighed and stopped walking.

"Alright. Fine. These past few days, I haven't been able to stop thinking about you. Not in the least. I was smiling at you, Bella, not the situation or the fact that you were about to pass out from a lack of oxygen." My breath caught in my throat again and I had to suck in a huge amount of air to be able to think straight.

While staring at him, I couldn't think of anything to say. The only thought that ran through my head was, 'he's lying'.

"Edward, why would you want to see _me_?" I finally asked. He shook his head and his voice came out in a hoarse whisper.

"I don't know."

* * *

We walked much further than we did the last time. Once we got past the extended awkward silence, things came naturally once more. I even thought to fight back the shivers that threatened to wrack my body. I walked with Edward's pace and noticed when he slowed. "Can I show you something?"

"Sure," I answered hesitantly. What if going on a walk with his was a bad idea?

"Hang on a second," he said and he darted forward, literally into the bushes. Seconds later, he came back out with a grin on his face.

"Might I ask what you just did?" I asked, almost wincing. He laughed lightly and beckoned me to come forward. Taking a huge chance, I did.

"Close your eyes," he instructed. I did as I was told and felt his chilled hand take mine lightly. I felt myself being pulled through the bushes.

"Edward—' I started, but was cut off.

"Alright, open your eyes," he said. I did, mentally preparing myself to strike at any moment if something happened. There was no need. Before us lay something that I never expected to find in the middle of L.A. In fact, I never expected to find a place like this anywhere.

A perfectly symmetrical meadow lay hidden behind a wall of bushes. In truth, the bushes looked like a gardener had never found them, but the meadow was perfect. The soft looking grass was covered in delicate flowers. On the far end, there was a small stream running.

"Oh," I exhaled, walking forward with a smile plastered on my face. Noting the fact that the stream was actually running, I turned to Edward. "The stream is running?" He laughed.

"There's a house about a mile away from here. The owners are never there, but the caretakers don't know that their fish pond is broken," he explained. "The water runs straight through here." I furrowed my brow in confusion.

"How do you know that? How did you find this place? I thought you lived in New York?"

"I do," he said. "I've just spent a lot of time out here. One's bound to find places like this when they look hard enough." Edward and I sat together for the next hour or so, talking. Talking almost like I did with Alice, minus the incredibly personal girl-stuff. He asked about my mother again, and I couldn't stop myself from telling him about the phone call.

"It's like she dropped me out of her life when I stopped being her little girl," I had said. He listened closely, occasionally nodding, his facial expressions portraying the emotions that I felt. He had asked so many questions until I finally broke in myself.

"Edward, why are you here?" Amusement crossed through his eyes.

"Well, I must say, I'm surprised you haven't learned this yet. When a mommy and a daddy love each other very much," I cut him off.

"That's not what I mean!" A blush had burned itself across my cheeks. "Why are you here with me? Why did you ask to take a walk with me? I mean, don't you have other 'judging things' to do?" His eyes turned back to the serious backdrop that they had been a few seconds ago.

"No, I don't." He said simply. "I could be sitting and talking about male models with Jay and J., but…I would much rather be out here." I laughed lightly at the tone of his voice, not necessarily picking up the hint. Walking back, I realized how much time had passed.

"Crap," I mumbled, looking down. Edward looked at me, concerned.

"What is it?"

"What am I going to tell them? We've been gone for a while." He smiled lightly.

"You were talking to your mom," he said. I raised my eyebrow and nodded. Saying goodbye was harder than it was the last time. It literally felt like a chunk had been ripped out of me, and I had no idea why.

Luckily, there was no need for me to explain anything, seeing as the girls were running around like they were headless chickens, in a response to a Tyra Mail…Tyra Mail that said we were to be ready in twenty minutes. My mind went into shock. Did Edward know about this? He could have just gotten himself into monumental trouble, and just the thought of it sent my chest into spasms.

Getting ready proved to be yet another challenge for me. My hair wasn't too bad, but my outfit needed some serious help. Pulling on a the same jeans as before, I picked out a striped thermal long sleeve and sprayed some sort of perfume that Alice had shoved into my bag in select areas of my body. I was sure I smelled a little bit rank.

In the car, the girls guessed at what we were doing. "We're going bungee jumping!" someone called out. I was still in a daze and couldn't play along with them.

After seeing what we were doing, I snapped out of whatever trance I was in and found it much easier to portray emotion. Tight rope walking. If there was one thing I COULD NOT do, it was this. I lightened up as I watched a few of the girls stumble. As I walked up, my knees shaking slightly, one of the men walked up and helped me onto the platform. Before returning next to his brother, he whispered into my ear, "Walk like you're in heels." I blushed slightly, and did as I was told.

It worked about halfway down, until I slipped out from underneath myself and found myself in the arms of the same guy who gave me instructions. "Well, it worked for a little while," he said with a laugh. "Great job sweetie!" The rest of the night was filled with the girls laughing and falling off of the tight rope.

In the morning, while arriving at our destination, we all knew what last night was about, and we all reacted the same way. This week's challenge literally had the potential to break my ankle.

While we got dressed, we all began to freak out.

"Aw, fuck," I heard someone mutter. I suspected it might have been Meg, but we were all thinking it anyway. She was the only one who voiced it.

As expected, I totally screwed up. I couldn't get past the first crack with out rolling my ankles. By the time I got through it, not only was I in pain from walking with my joints twisted at an impossible angle, but also I was embarrassed. While waiting for the others to finish, I sat down at a bench, trying to calm down. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw the cameramen interviewing Monique. She was talking about me. Rage seeped into my core. The bitch had the nerve. After all of the crap she tries to pull at the house. What did I ever do to her? My head suddenly started pounding and I couldn't focus as well as I was. I made a mental note to take some Advil.

My nerves were like ice as we waited for them to announce the winner. AJ. It didn't make much of a difference to me; I knew I wouldn't have won. Walking after that hurt and in the car, I refused to look at Monique. God only knows what we've said in the interviews. I doubted any of us really thought about the fact that we would see them one way or another.

**EPOV**

Flashes of last night blurred before my eyes when I woke up. Bella. Her face bathed in moonlight was forever imprinted in my mind. Her laugh was forever recorded in my memory. As I was getting dressed, still thinking about her, something changed in my mind and my heart.

I had never acted like this before. Nothing had driven me to even have the impulse of writing secret letters or sneaking out of a hotel room to go and see someone. I had never truly wanted to be with someone. Anyone who I had taken to the time to get to know only had one thing on their mind. Bella—her complexity, her selflessness, her aura, all of it just pulled me in. Attached me somehow.

Tonight, I would get to see her again. The only drawback was the fact that it was for eliminations. In evaluations, the girls walked out and my eyes zeroed in on her. Her cheeks were slightly flushed and even from behind the table, I could see that her eyes looked different. Something was up.

One by one, we evaluated them, but the true challenge began when they left and we had to decide which one wouldn't be coming back. When it came time for Bella's photo, I couldn't speak. Occasionally I would mumble some word of approval, but I knew that anything I said would put Tyra on edge—she would suspect something.

After all, Tyra _was_ the one who sent me out get to know them. Had I been doing that? No…but I was sure I could get what I needed to know from Bella, she was always honest. With the exception of her head. That one still struck me as odd.

In the end, we sent Monique home. I found it quite humorous how none of the girls said goodbye and none of them were shocked. In fact, they looked relieved. The change in the mood of the room had little affect on me; I was still stick on a personal change. One that overjoyed me, and terrified me at the same time.

**AN: So here it is :) sorry for the wait. And for those of you who ignored the incredibly annoying author's note that I just put up, surprise! I changed the title of the story. **

**For those of you who are a little bit...uneasy about the language, sorry. Swearing is a part of life. So, hopefully I'll get some nice reviews for this chapter huh? They make me want to write more, and they help me develop my ideas faster. I don't go by outlines, I can't work like that, so it takes me a while to conjure them up sometimes. You're reviews help! **


	10. Chapter 10

**BPOV**

"Can you cook?" I heard someone ask behind me. Behind me, Meg was clutching her stomach. I pulled my eyebrows together in confusion.

"Uh, yeah, I guess," I said. Her face lit up.

"Will you pleeeeaaasssssseeeeeeee make me something to eat? I'm starving," she huffed. I hadn't cooked for someone in a while, and this was one contribution that I could make.

"Sure," I said with a shrug. She followed me into the kitchen. "Is there anything specific that you want?" She opened the fridge, and I almost laughed at her facial expression—she looked like a kid in a candy store.

"Ooh! Grilled cheese!" she said, and smiled at me. Her long hair swung with every movement she made. After grabbing the cheese and butter out of the fridge, I grilled together her sandwich.

"How do you want it cut?" I asked over my shoulder. Meg made ran her finger through the air in a diagonal motion and laughed.

"I fricken love you Bella, thanks so much!" she said and pranced out of the kitchen. I was sure I had seen her cook before, but I didn't have the heart to tell her no. For some reason today, my body was sore. Every movement that I made sent a pounding sensation to my head. Leaning against the counter top, I put my head in my hands and desperately rubbed my forehead._ This headache needs to stop…now,_ I thought through gritted teeth.

I could tell someone had walked into the kitchen by the sound of their feet padding against the tile. "Are you okay?" someone asked. Looking up slowly, I saw CariDee.

"I'm fine," I mumbled.

"Are you sure?" she asked, coming closer to me. "You look a little bit…off." I sighed and shook my head.

"Yeah, I'm sure. I just have a headache," I said, moving from the counter. "Thanks, though," I said, walking away. I walked right out of the kitchen and into Edward with an 'oof'. Tingles of pain shattered through my head.

Edward's hands reached out and caught my face. "Sorry," he whispered. Ignoring the flashing headache, I grabbed his head and pulled him outside.

"Edward," I started. He held up his hand to silence me. I had never really seen him in broad daylight. He was even more gorgeous than at night. With the sun shining off of his skin, his vibrant green eyes shone, making every other facial feature stand out. Edward grabbed my hand and led me down the path we had taken together not too long ago. When we were at a safe enough distance, he asked,

"Are you alright?" When I looked up at him, she sun shined in my eyes, making me immediately wince and look down.

"Mmhm," I said. "Fine. Are you?"

"I'm great," he said, though his face was scrunched in confusion. "However, I don't buy what you just said for one second." I glanced up at him, shocked at his boldness.

"What do you mean?" I asked, suddenly out of breath.

"It's written all over your face," he said simply. "And, your eyes looked much different the first time I saw you." He noticed my eyes?

"How so?" I challenged.

"The bruise on your forehead, tell me about it," he demanded in a gentle manner, completely sidestepping my question.

"It's not really a bruise anymore, more like a lump," I argued.

"Bella, that doesn't matter. Just tell me the truth." His eyes were pleading, almost like he had pieced this theory together in his head and needed one fact to prove it. I sighed and looked down.

"I fell and hit my head on the banister," my voice was quiet. He stopped walking.

"And you couldn't tell me that in the first place because…"

"Because no one is supposed to know that I'm just about the clumsiest person that can be found within a three-hundred mile radius, that's why," I snapped, immediately regretting it. My headache roared.

"Honestly, Bella, that's childish." His facial expression was almost terrifying. Not even my mother had looked this concerned. Ever.

"God, what is with you? Where did all of this-this- jerky interrogation crap come from?" I asked, shocked. In my mind, that wasn't childish in the least; this would have been yet another thing the girls could use against me. Edward started to walk slowly.

"The judges were talking about you," he said. My face drained.

"Really?" I squeaked.

"Not anything bad, trust me. Jay is concerned about your head. And it all makes sense now. Did it ever occur to you that you might have a concussion?" He asked, his tone a little less menacing.

"I don't have a concussion! What, are you and Jay ganging up on me about this?" I almost shouted. "It's a bruise, Edward, nothing more." He stopped again and turned to face me. Placing both hands on my face, he looked into he eyes. Seconds later, he let me go and shook his head.

"If that's not a concussion, then please, explain to me why your eyes look the way they do, and why you seem to have trouble walking straight. Please, enlighten me."

"Do you even know what you're talking about?" I spluttered, reeling from the feeling of is hands on my face for the second time today. "Just because your dad's a doctor doesn't give you all of the facts in the world."

"That's just it," he insisted. "My father is a doctor Bella, in my twenty two years of life I must have picked something up from him. All of those years of the endless study sessions and conventions, I had to have learned something. You aren't okay." I finally gave up.

"So what!?" I shrieked. "It's not like it matters anyway, I've been fine these last couple of days, it hasn't prevented me from doing a shoot or breathing, so I'm pretty sure I'll survive."

"Do you know what could happen if you just ignore this?" He asked, his eyes penetrating.

"Uh, I get better faster?" I shot at him.

"No. It's called brain damage. Amnesia. Seizures. Even a coma, Bella. You can't just forget about this." He truly sounded like Charlie might have.

"Even if I do have a concussion, I can't get this taken care of—you saw what happened to Monique. She got sick, ended up in the hospital, and went home! I don't want to go home just yet."

"And I don't want you to go home either. But I also don't want you get even more hurt by just acting like it's not there! Especially now with the challenges you're doing today. Can you honestly tell me that you don't care?" I looked down, not willing to meet his eyes.

"Then please, at least take it easy," he begged. "For me." I huffed and walked forward a few steps, expecting him to follow me.

"Fine." I said, and continued walking. We walked in silence until I broke in. "I should go back."

When I stopped, Edward was staring at me. He stepped forward slowly and I felt his arms wrap about my torso, pulling me into him. After resting my face lightly against his shoulder, I looked up at him, and before I knew what was happening, before I knew what I doing, my lips had brushed softly against his.

My breath hitched in my throat and I was sure my face was beet red. I had just made a huge mistake.

That was what I thought until I felt his lips press against mine, harder than I had myself. If felt like there was wing blowing all around us, and goose bumps rose on my arms and legs. I wrapped my arms around his neck, hoping that I would never have to let go of him.

Sadly, all good things much come to an end. And it did, when he brought his lips up to my ear and whispered, "It matters because I care about you, and only you. A lot."

I looked up at him, eyes wide and afraid. What did that mean?

He carefully walked me back home. "And for the love of God Bella, take it easy," he said before leaving. I felt like I was walking on a cloud when I got in. Before getting ready to leave, I walked over to the cabinet and grabbed some more advil.

* * *

In the van, I sat next to Brooke with an incredible smile plastered onto my face. My pounding headache didn't even matter now. 

"What's with you?" Brooke asked happily. "Why are you so…smiley?" I wracked my brain for an answer—no one could know the truth.

"It's a nice day out, that's all," I said. She nodded in agreement and put her head on my shoulder.

"I miss Texas," she mumbled. "Some days, I just wanna go home. I mean, I'm still in High School, so this is hard, know what I mean?" Momentarily, I thought of when we first met and how she pretty much got drunk and just about partied naked.

"Yeah, I know what you mean. I don't really like the smog," I joked. She laughed and her eyes regained their twinkle. When we arrived, we piled out the van and into a giant building. In front of us, a man began posing in…very painful looking positions.

"Hello Ladies!" A woman called out. Apparently, she was a judge for Canada's Next Top Model. And the man in front of us was an extreme model. He posed in positions that gave me the chills, and we were supposed to learn how to do them.

After changing into incredibly embarrassing spandex and leotards, I found an empty yoga mat and laid down. Edward's warning echoed in my mind. He knew we were going to do this, and just as he had warned, the painful throbbing came back as soon as the instructor told me to fit my leg over my head.

After maybe fifteen minutes of ridiculous pulling and tugging of my limbs, I was about ready to quite. Thankfully, we were 'dismissed' and I crumpled into a chair.

"Oh my god," I moaned. "I was not made to do anything along those lines." A few other girls agreed with me. Anchal sat there quietly—she had done better than most of us.

Back at home, I grabbed a water bottle and crawled into bed. Just as I was about to fall asleep, Brooke pounced. "What happened to your good mood?"

"Stretching, yoga, and extreme poses, that's what happened," I mumbled into my pillow. She laughed and left the room.

Early the next morning, I woke up once again to a pounding headache. With a sigh, I forced myself out of bed and into a scalding shower. My muscles burned with every step I took. When I got out, a few other girls were up, but no one was in a bad mood.

Since Monique had left, the house had been a relatively peaceful place. No one really fought—with the exception of the 'you're competition' mental blocks that we all had.

In all of our minds, I'm sure we all were wondering, _"why the hell did we just do that?" _

It became clear when we were called to our challenge. Normally, I would be incredibly nervous to model famous designers clothes with so little experience. Add on modeling with the extreme poses we just learned, and you could set me up an appointment with the coroner's office. Now.

While the designer stood in front of us, I couldn't really register her words. They didn't make sense in my head. She began gesturing toward a glass case filled with jewelry. And then we were shuffled into a back room where hair and makeup artists ran around like crazy people.

This was our challenge: while standing on pedestals, we had to do some wacked up pose and somehow manage to look happy and show off the clothes. I failed miserably.

To be honest, I played it as safe as possible. Every time the little timer would go off, I would simply twist my body in the opposite direction and point my toes. In the end, Eugenia walked out being the winner, with 30,000 dollars worth of jewelry. Before we headed into the van, someone whispered, "rich bitch," and I couldn't help but snort.

On the way home, my mind flicked back and forth over Edward. His face, his lips, his touch. Everything about him. Even his hostile glare when he insisted on my concussion. The unbelievable part for me was that I told him I loved him. And I meant it.

At home, I curled up on my bed, trying to ignore my pounding headache—doing as I was told and taking it easy. I longed to be able to see Edward, but at the same time, I was afraid to. Would things be different now? Unconsciously, I started to think of the strange letter that I found.

Was it from him? _I hope to God it was_. Was there really some creepy stalker or was Edward just looking out for me? Leaning over, I dug through my bag until I found it and examined the handwriting.

It was elegant, unlike any writing I had even seen in my life. Of course, any writing out there was better than my chicken scratch. The writing was mesmerizing. Just like his face…

* * *

My eyelids began to flutter and I found that I was quickly falling asleep Today had really worn me out. The next thing I knew, Brooke was shaking me awake—again. 

"Come on," she whispered. "We got Tyra Mail last night, but you were asleep. We have to go at 7:30." I looked over at my clock: 6:47.

"Oh, thanks," I mumbled, allowing her to pull me out of bed. "I don't remember what happened."

"You passed out, that's all I know," she laughed and began to get dressed. I pulled together an outfit and crashed on the sofa until the others woke up and began to run out the door. Little did we know that the drive would be two hours.

After two agonizing hours in a crappy van, we ended up in the desert on the site for a photo shoot. The area was set up with trailers and weird looking contraptions like cages and platforms. "What on earth are we doing?" Brooke whispered at me. I shrugged and we walked in a clump to an opening. Jay popped out of nowhere, eyeing me especially.

"Hello ladies! Did you enjoy the car ride?" His voice was laced with sarcasm. We all nodded and then groaned. He laughed and held up a small note card. "Today, we are going to be modeling, and giving justice to all of the circus freaks out there!" My eyes snapped open. Circus freaks?

Jay cast me as an old face with a young body. After being ushered into hair and makeup, I came out looking horrific. They sprayed oils and sparkles all over my legs and stomach, but my face was something else.

The actually pasted fake wrinkles onto my face and painted on the most hideous green eye shadow I've ever seen in my life. In truth, I had seen a lot of make up—Alice had once aspired to be a make up artist. Thank god it passed.

Jay seemed to like my shoot. I felt old being up there, but the mediocre comments about my lovely make up made me pull it off. I only used a few slides before Jay kicked me off of the stage. As soon as I walked out, I had to choke back laughter.

Meg had a beard. A real, full-blown, hairy beard. And the sad thing was she pulled it off. She laughed with me and pranced around saying, "I'm a hairy man!" A few minutes after that, she found an artist and starting pulling at it. "Seriously, I really want to take this off."

Everyone was euphoric on the way home, even though it was almost seven and incredibly hot outside. In a way, it felt like home, but it wasn't _home_. "I can't believe they painted abs on you! That's hilarious!" AJ and Jaeda joked in the car.

"Oh yeah? They made you the cannibal! You had to pose with raw, bloody meat! That's gross!" She laughed. Everyone in the car laughed about their roles.

"And Bella, man, your face looked like an ass, I'm not even joking," Amanda said. I burst out laughing, regretting it instantly. The advil I took was wearing off.

"Well, thanks," I weezed. "You two make great Siamese twins. Might I suggest it for a Halloween Costume?"

After we had been home for a while, Tyra suddenly appeared. Everyone was excited about it—I for one was terrified. I wasn't exactly sure if having a personal connection with any judge was allowed or not. If I screwed this up, Edward's whole career was down the drain.

Our meeting with Tyra turned into a giant therapy session. "So, is everything going alright with you girls? Any problems?"

We all said no, but Anchal on the other hand shrank into herself in the corner.

"Anchal?" Tyra asked. When she looked up, she had tears in her eyes.

"I-I overheard—I have some problems with my body. It's my hardest obstacle to overcome. E-ever since I was a little kid, I was always made fun of. I was never pretty and because of it, I can't see myself as beautiful or pretty. I over—'' she had to stop to breath.

One of the girls tried to interrupt, but Tyra stopped her. "Let her talk," she said gently.

"I overheard some of the girls talking in the Jacuzzi. And it just really hurt me. It brought me down a lot," she finally got out. Realization hit my senses. The other night, a bunch of girls got together in the Jacuzzi and had a giant gossip circle. That was night I got the note. Had I known they were talking about her…

When Tyra left, I had a hard time looking at Anchal. What if she thought I was part of it? I know I wasn't, but looks may be deceiving. I found her sitting along on the couch.

"Hey," I said quietly. She looked up at me and smiled.

"Hi Bella," she said, and then put her head on my shoulder. I tried my best not to react.

"I just want you to know, I'm really sorry about what happened. Through my eyes, you're beautiful." I felt the side of her face lift into a smile.

"Thanks, that means a lot." As soon as I said it, my chest felt much lighter. I sat with her for a little while, and she ended up venting about everything that was on her mind. It didn't bother me, if it made her happy, I would listen.

The next night, we all took the time to get dressed up. Brooke helped me curl my hair. It didn't have as much 'oomf' and I wanted it to have, but it looked nice. I ended up doing her make up for her.

She gasped at my giant mirror. "How on earth did you fit that in there?" she asked. As I fixed her make up, I explained to her about Alice. "I wanna meet her!" she laughed.

"Maybe," I said. She looked down at the mirror and smiled.

"Ooh, I like this! Can I hire you?" she joked.

"Nah, I'll do it for free," I said. She hugged me and moved onto finding a pretty outfit to wear. Fixing my make up was much more difficult this time. I didn't even like wearing the stuff, but Edward didn't need to see my splotchiness tonight.

"I think you should wear a dress tonight!" Brooke called from the other side of the room. "You wear jeans too much." I sighed and dug through my bag, knowing that Alice would have packed a dress and leggings—she was always trying to get to wear them.

I found a white dress and pulled on some black leggings. "Happy?" I called back to Brooke, standing up. She squealed and laughed. The others looked at us like we were crazy.

As we walked to the judging room, I locked eyes with Edward, trying my best to keep a straight face. Once we lined up, the judging began.

* * *

**EPOV**

They walked into the room and my eyes desperately searched for Bella. They zoned in as soon as I spotted her face. Everything about her was radiating—almost like a halo of light that surrounded her features. I couldn't stop thinking about kissing her. It had been that way all day.

Judging was difficult. When Bella walked forward, I had to restrain myself from saying the things that I truly wanted to say. I wasn't prepared for her to be a young body with an old face.

"Theirs is something disturbing about this photograph, and yet, I'm in love with it," was the only thing I could say. When I looked up, a blush had found it's way to her cheeks.

The decision was easier on my nervous system—Bella definitely wasn't going home.

When they came back into the room, Tyra routinely called them all out, until it was left between Jaeda and Meg. When if became clear that Meg was leaving, most of the girls started crying, including Bella. My chest twinged painfully as I saw the tears stream down her face. It was a sight that I never hoped, in all of my existence, to ever see again.

_**I am completely sorry for the long wait! Seriously, you guys can mentally smack me if you want. But, on the bright side, this is a longer chapter than usual :) So please, if you must scream at me virtually, don't get too nasty. **_

_**And to Vampireme, kudos to you :) I haven't forgotten...though if you have, that's totally okay, I wouldn't be surprised--I've been gone a while, haven't I? **_


	11. Chapter 11

**BPOV**

I wasn't surprised when Edward suddenly appeared—in fact, I was waiting for it. Of course, after I made sure that I was decent, my heart caught up with me and I found myself of the verge of hyperventilation. _What the hell am I doing? He said he cared, that's all. It's not like he confessed his undying love…but he kissed me. And I kissed him…and since then, things have been so…_

Before I finished my mind rant, a light tap on my shoulder brought me back and I was staring at him. It took everything I had to not cry and throw my arms around him at the same time. He grabbed my hand and pulled me outside. Then, he surprised me.

Edward scooped me into his arms, and took off running. "What are you doing?" I almost yelled. In seconds, I was laughing.

"Making you laugh apparently," he said, keeping the same pace.

"Put my down!" I shrieked, knowing we were far enough away. "Edward! You're going to get hurt!" He laughed and kept going.

"No, I won't, I promise." I finally pressed my face into his shoulder and tried to ignore the wind in my ears. He stopped just before he pulled me through the bushes and into the meadow. I was shocked to see it in the same exact condition as before. In seconds, he was whispering in my ear. "And besides, if I let you run on your own, that wouldn't turn out so well."

My eyebrows furrowed, and I looked down. He immediately backtracked.

"I didn't mean it that way, Bella. Your head." He brushed his palm against the side of my face and my whole entire mood shifted. Things between us had changed. Big time. I sighed lightly and plopped down in the grass. Over the past weeks, not only had Edward and I changed, but the house had too.

There were six of us left now. CariDee, Amanda, Michelle, Jaeda, Eugena, and me. One by one, the girls had been eliminated. First AJ, then Brooke. Brooke was the hardest for me to see go. She was truly the only one here that I could make some sort of connection with. On the upside, she was the youngest, and the most promising out of all of us. When Anchal left, we all knew that the true competition was all that was left, and we all stepped up our game.

Edward sat down next to me and I rested my head on his shoulder. "It's beautiful out tonight," I mumbled. He chuckled once.

"No, you are," he said. I blushed instantly and looked down. "Why are you looking down?" I didn't answer him, still shocked from his comment. "Bella, please don't be shy around me. You know I would never do anything to hurt you." I finally looked up at him.

"Of course I do," I said. I gently placed his hands on the sides of my face and pulled me closer to him. His lips were gentle at first, but the fervor and intensity of them increased in seconds. I pushed back and we were both gasping for air. Over the last few weeks, we had had our moments. In fact, almost every night, I snuck out here with him. And, though not as often, I had become quite familiar with his face.

"I have to ask you something," he said quietly. I looked up at him in a daze. "Well, two somethings actually." I nodded, giving him the okay. "First, will you tell me some things about the girls in the house?" I raised an eyebrow.

"Can I ask why?"

"Remember when I told you that Tyra sent me over here when we first met?" I nodded. "She actually sent me to get to know the girls, and she's been kicking me about ever since." I laughed quietly and nodded.

"What else did you need to ask me?" I asked, still amused. He looked me in the eyes, and took a deep breath.

"Would you be afraid if I didn't just care anymore?" Before he spoke, there had been a soft breeze, but now, the air was still.

"Edward…" I trailed off. He stared straight at me, unmoving, boring into me. "What do you mean?"

"I don't just care anymore, it's something more than that. Bella, I—I think I'm in love with you." His voice was choked back with emotion. Enough emotion to make my chest tighten even more.

"And you want to know if I'm afraid of that?" I asked, almost stuttering. He nodded. "No," I whispered, looking into my hands. "I'm not afraid." I felt his cool arms wrap around my shoulders and I pressed my face into his shirt.

"I'm not looking to hear that you feel the same way, but I can't look at you anymore with out you at least knowing," he said, fitting my head underneath his chin. I had a hard time controlling my breathing, and no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't tell him what I really wanted to say. We sat that way for a while. It didn't even occur to me that I should tell him about the other girls in the house.

It was probably too far into the season by now—there was only six of us left. In the house, there was a commotion going on inside the bedroom. It was getting harder and harder to sneak off.

"Where did you go? We've been looking everywhere for you!" Amanda pounced.

"Oh—I went for a walk," I said with a shrug. I was a terrible liar.

"Why?" Michelle asked, her eyebrows rose in surprise.

"I just like walking at night, it kinda relaxes me," I answered.

"Are you kidding me? There are creepy men out there!" CariDee chimed in. I burst out laughing.

"I doubt there's going to be any creepy men out there waiting to get me." My mind flashed to Edward. He was anything but a creepy man.

"Just be careful, okay," CariDee finished. I nodded and she pulled me in a hug. "You really did scare us." When we woke up, we were whisked off into the famous white van and ended up in an old theater. None of us really knew what was going on, but when Tasha Smith walking onto the stage, we knew something was going on.

With Tasha, we ended up doing an exercise called 'dumping. This exercise entailed each of us getting up on stage and letting go of all of our emotion. My heart slammed into my chest. All of my emotion right now was swarming around Edward. I promised myself I wouldn't say his name, no matter what happened up there.

We all almost fell apart just from watching that one person pour their hearts out. Each 'dump' involved tears and some for of screaming. There was only CariDee and me left. Tasha called me up to the stage and I slowly walked up. "Let everything out," she encouraged. I took a deep breath and let everything that I had ever thought and felt since the beginning of the competition.

"I came on here not knowing what to do with myself. In fact, I didn't even want to be here. I've never been so afraid in my life. I wasn't good enough for my mother anymore and the only person who I trusted and cared about sent me her. And it's not even fair.

She loved me enough to send me off somewhere that she knew I would hate because she thought I was good enough, and I can't even believe in myself. I don't even know who I am! I don't know how to trust anyone but her and I can't just let myself be who I want to be. There's always something holding me back, and I'm sick of it!"

Tears trailed down my cheeks and I had to stop and just breathe. The whole time, I managed to let out everything that I felt about Edward by somehow talking about Alice. I sighed and started to talk again. "Sometimes, I don't even think it's worth it, because I hate this goddamn competition." I finished and walked off of the stage. Amanda put her arm around my shoulders when I sat back down.

CariDee walked up to the stage, and we were all shocked. CariDee never had any problems with people in the house; she stood her grounds and was always some sort of friend to all of us.

CariDee literally let everything go. After confessing about her attempted suicide and the fact that this was the only thing that felt right to her, she walked out of the room. We sat there stunned.

"Wow…" Eugena said. "She's so strong." Amanda and Tasha both let to go find her and stayed too caught up in emotion to really do much. When they came back, CariDee was all smiles again. She apologized and then Tasha introduced us to our challenge.

This whole exercise was in preparation for our challenge. We each had to shoot our own silent movie, and the winner would get a guest role in One Tree Hill, a hit show on the same channel that this show would air on.

My movie wasn't too disastrous. But, I still took it easy and didn't thrash around as much as other people did for the sake of my head. The headaches didn't come as often now, but when they did, it was worse than usual. While the other girls threw themselves on the floor and pounded the ground with their fists, I slid down and slapped at the floor instead.

When we got home, Tyra Mail was waiting for us. In addition to the little envelope, we had the winning movie. When we put it in, CariDee's video flashed on the screen. I doubt any of us were jealous; after what we heard today, she deserved it. I wasn't expecting anything further to happen in the video.

But then Tyra appeared on the screen. Words had been flashing on the screen, but my eyes only zoned in on a few of them. 'Pack your Bag's Girls….You're going to Spain." Then, Tyra ran into the room accompanied by several dancers all adorned in a Spanish outfit. Oh My God. We were going to Spain.

That night, CariDee went to the filming for her prize. Edward didn't come that night either, but I wasn't too surprised. In a way, I was glad. I didn't know what to say to him. The next morning, we packed our bags and hopped on a plane. Several hours later, we landed in Spain and it truly felt like the first day all over again.

**EPOV**

Even though I desperately wanted to, I didn't come that night. I wanted more than anything to see Bella excited about Spain. In truth, I was worried about her head, the cabin pressure and the different atmosphere; it wouldn't be good or healthy for her.

I kept reliving the other night. I had told her, and just telling her made me happy. I was truly overjoyed when she didn't run away from me, and perfectly content when she didn't say anything after that.

She kept her distance on the way back, which is what I expected. I wracked my brains to find anything that I did wrong. I had never felt this way about anyone before. No one had been capable of making my heart pound, or making my thoughts constantly blur.

Tyra caught up to me in the hallway. "Oh Eddie!" she called out. I looked behind me as she ran after me.

"Hello," I said politely, sliding the card through my lock. She followed me in.

"Some big stuff is happening today," she said. I raised an eyebrow at her.

"Like…"

"The girls are going to Spain." Her face was divided by a giant smile. My eyes widened and spending time with Bella in a different county skewered my thoughts. We had already promised each other that not only would I not give things away to her, but I also wouldn't influence the judges to keep her in the competition.

"Wow…when are we leaving?" I asked.

"Tomorrow morning," she said. I nodded and gestured to the room.

"Guess I better start packing." She lightly pecked my cheek and left the room. Everything was fine and dandy. Until Tyra found me again and told me what the shoot was going to be.

**BPOV**

We all got onto this giant tour bus and met our driver. Apparently, we were picking up other passengers. None of us were expecting them to be guys. We picked up six of them, and each one had a gift for us. I was surprised, and honestly had no idea of what they were for.

One of the sat next to me and had the biggest smile on his face. He held out his hand.

"Hi, I'm Jake," he said proudly. He didn't have a Spanish accent in the least. I lightly shook his hand.

"I'm Bella," I replied. It was already getting dark out and the whole ride, Jake was constantly telling me jokes that I couldn't help but laugh at. We pulled up to this restaurant. It looked pretty fancy.

"Have you ever eaten Spanish food?" Jake asked. I shrugged.

"Does beans and rice count?" He laughed and shook his head.

"Anything that you can buy in a can does not count."

"You can buy rice in a can?" I asked, faking surprise. He laughed and plopped down next to me. About halfway through the meal, he leaned towards me.

"Wanna know a secret?"

"Sure," I said, looking down at my food.

"I'm not from Spain." I burst out laughing and instantly covered my mouth.

"I kinda figured that one out," I replied. Then, a waiter came in bearing Tyra Mail and a basket full of rolled paper. The rolled paper was a script.

With these men, we had to pick partners and shoot a commercial for Secret deodorant. That part didn't seem to scary. Jake tapped me on the shoulder.

"Partner?" He asked. I nodded and smiled. Then I looked closely at the script. It was in Catalan.

"We have to speak in…whatever this language is?" I shrieked. He laughed and nodded his head.

Then, I looked at the end of the script and read what I was supposed to do. I was supposed to kiss Jake at the end of this commercial. But knowing of where we were, this would be much more than an average kiss, and he seemed to be happy about that.

My mind went dead, and all that I could think about was Edward. This would seriously mess things up—me kissing a hot non-Spanish guy, and then Edward, somehow getting to watch it all.

**Hey- most of you probably noticed something odd that Bella says in the last chapter about saying she loves Edward. IGNORE IT. Thats a typo that I will fix later. Thanks!!!!**


	12. Read it if you want

Hey Guys, honestly this has nothing to do with the story at all. I just figured you should know a few things.

First of all, I'm a huge Jacob fan, but I'm also a huge Edward fan. I'm caught between the two, know what I mean? But Edward and Bella belong together no matter what in my head.

Next, these books run my life, literally. So, everyday, I spend hours looking up information about the movie that I'm terrified to see. In fact, I shouldn't even see the movie! But, I figure if I let the books run my life, might as well let the movie do it too.

I can guarantee you that I will leave that theater crying tears of rage. They have screwed up this movie so badly. After reading several articles about the scenes in the movie, well, it's gonna be bad. Let's put it this way—it will probably be an amazing movie to old ladies and people who haven't read twilight and devoted their lives to it. To anyone else, the screen will be stuck with popcorn, sourpatch kids, and soda and the manager will rip their hair out because of the angry mob that comes to attack them.

Yeah, there are people out there that say 'if you're a true fan, you wont go and see the movie'. I don't think that's right, if you're a fan, you're a fan. Seeing a movie isn't gonna change anything about that.

Onto my next point! The Stephenie Meyer website is actually not doing so well right now information wise, which is completely understandable. Wanna know the whole Twilight Cast?

Go to:

is actually a pretty good fansite.

Most of you are gonna be shocked, so shocked you just might pee everywhere. They did all right with some of the cast, but…well, I wont start ranting about it. Go see for yourself!

So, you have now seen a small fraction of the crazy, devoted side of Ari. I won't call it obsessed, I'm just _passionate _And yup,a SMALL fraction. Die hards out there, I love you guys :)

By the way, there should be a new chapter coming out soon.

Wasn't that the longest author's note ever?????


	13. Chapter 12

**BPOV**

The ride to our new home felt stiff and uncomfortable. I don't know if it was from the cheap taxi seats or not, but I got the distinct feeling that it was my own conscious that kept me from relaxing. Me. Kissing. Jacob.

In truth, if I had to pick any one of them to kiss and hiding in a dark closet wasn't an option, I would have picked Jacob—at least he could speak English, right? On the inside, it felt like my world had shattered. I had let Edward become everything about me, and I knew from the first time we kissed that I didn't want to let anyone else's lips touch mine. Nor could I comprehend it.

A dull throb had centered itself above my right temple and I wanted nothing more than to crawl into bed with a giant pillow. In the car, Jaeda was almost in tears.

"My guy doesn't like black girls!" She said. "He said that to my face! God, I don't even want to kiss him, but it would be a little more bearable if he at least had the desire to!" I focused on my lines, reading the script over and over again.

When we pulled up to the house, the girls and I were shocked. The Spanish adorned apartment was absolutely beautiful. Everyone but Jaeda and I were completely ecstatic about it. The new house felt homier than the one back in L.A.

After an hour of tossing and turning, I gave up on trying to sleep. The thought of tomorrow was ramming on my insides, and my headache _would not stop_. After grabbing my script, I parked it on the balcony and stayed up until my eyes refused to obey me.

My lines were almost engrained into my mind. The words were no problem…the pronunciation was a whole different ballpark. I might have gotten one hour of sleep, maybe less, but I just about screamed when my alarm clock went off.

**EPOV**

For the entire flight, I had trouble thinking straight. It was like Tyra knew what was going on between us and constantly picked challenges to drive us insane.

"Why are you such a grouch today? Is everything alright?" J. asked me. I tried to lighten up after that, but nothing worked too well. At our hotel, Tyra rounded us all up in her room and explained the shoot in more detail.

"So, right about now, the girls are meeting with the boys. This shoot is not to necessarily tell how well they can kiss or flirt with men, this shoot is more about subjecting them to an uncomfortable situation and seeing how well they come out on top.

"Would you ladies and gentlemen like it if you had to learn Catalan and make out with a foreign guy for a photo shoot?" she asked. Jay and J. got quiet and she rolled her eyes.

"I take that back! Edward, would you enjoy that in the least?" she asked. I thought about how to compose myself for this one.

"Considering I'm not gay, no I really wouldn't. But in the sense that you're talking about, no because my mind would constantly be stuck on someone back at home," I said. She nodded.

"That's exactly it." We left the room and I sat in front of the open window for the rest of the night. I couldn't sleep, and I didn't want to eat anything—nothing looked appetizing, even though I loved Mexican Food. The maid, it seemed, stopped by too often and my irritation with the world only flared more.

I wanted to see her. I needed to. Though I couldn't help it, my mind constantly drifted to a movie I had seen not too long ago with the rest of the judges.

When J. is moody, we all get it. We ended up watching a movie called _Moulin Rouge_. Right now, I felt exactly as how the two lovers in that movie are depicted…except I'm not a penniless writer and Bella isn't a prostitute plagued with consumption. The night stretched on and seemed endless. If I had known her true feelings, then maybe this wouldn't be so hard to bear.

**BPOV**

I truly felt like I was in some withdrawal from drugs. Not that I knew what it felt like, but if I had ever done drugs, I'm sure this is what the aftermath would feel like. My head pounded viciously and not even the cool glass window soothed it.

"I really don't want to do this," Jaeda complained. Her mood had only worsened as the morning progressed. Cari Dee patted her back gently, but I could see from her eyes that she had just about had it with her.

The van stopped and we followed a cement pathway. Tyra, of course, was standing there wearing a ridiculously beautiful outfit. Upon seeing Jaeda's face, she started in with the questions.

"You're not too happy about this one, huh?" she asked. Jaeda shook her head.

"No…my guy doesn't like black girls." Tyra seemed shocked, but then told her to suck it up and show the man that black girls have it all. Then she looked at me. Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion and she took a step closer.

"Bella, are you okay?" she asked. I nodded, instantly regretting it.

"Yeah, I'm just not used to the climate and stuff like that," I lied.

"That's understandable. Hopefully you'll be better in a few hours." The set was beautiful, and of course, there were several men all dressed up that didn't speak an ounce of English. My makeup artist, one who I had gotten to know pretty well, began to paint my face up.

"Oh, honey, you have bags under your eyes," he said. I shrugged and apologized. He laughed and applied extra foundation. "No biggie." My hair was then dolled into bouncy curls and I was instructed to wear a flirty outfit of jeans and a dark blue, tight, almost low-cut t-shirt.

I wouldn't be going for at least another hour, so I walked around back and stared at the giant body of water underneath me. The set was situated on a giant bridge. Someone moved next to me. Jacob.

"Hey," he said, scooting a little bit closer. Without meaning to, I tensed slightly.

"Hi," I answered meekly.

"How's it goin?" he asked, fishing for small talk of some sort. The small talk remained painfully small until he popped a bigger question.

"Are you nervous?" he asked. I honestly didn't know how to answer that one.

"Uh…" I started.

"I'm not," he broke in. "I mean, I don't have a problem with kissing you, is what I mean to say. I think it will be fun. This is definitely the best job I've gotten all month." I started down at the water, nodding my head. Chances were he thought it was me agreeing with him. I was nervous as hell.

Right on queue, someone shouted my name. "Bella! You're up!" It was Jay. Jake gave me a playful shove and he walked over to his spot. I went to my starting point with my insides quaking.

"Alright, when he tells you," Jay instructed. The director shouted,

"Action!" As I walked forward, my lines rolled out of my mouth effortlessly. I leaned against one of the actors, whispering a secret in his ear as I was instructed to do on the script. One by one, I passed the actors until I reached Jacob.

He was standing against the bridge, looking smug. I walked toward him and instantly, my head started to pound. My lines came out in a rush and before I knew it, my mouth was on his.

His lips were soft and gentle in a way. Yet they were terrifying in comparison to Edward's. Jacob's hand rested lightly behind my head and he pulled me closer to his. Then, I felt his hot breath pushing into my mouth and it took all of my strength to push off from him. Gasping, I said my last line. The director shouted, "Cut!" and everything went downhill from there.

The pain was more intense than it had ever been. I walked off the set shakily and grabbed my head. My breathing was labored and I found myself hunched over, biting against the pain. Behind me, I head people calling my name, but it was useless.

Tears spilled over my cheeks and I couldn't tell if it was because of the pain, or because I had kissed someone other than Edward. My lips belonged to him, because I loved him. It felt like my lungs were constricting and I struggled to get a breath.

Black spots clouded my vision and everything became hazy. People were still shouting, but their voices slowly faded away. The last thing I remembered feeling was a pair of arms around me just as I began to feel like I was floating. Falling, almost.

I couldn't see anymore, but two small thoughts pushed themselves through my brain. The first was more immediate. This wasn't good, something bad was happening. The second was more necessary for me. A single world that made the pain stop for a split second. Edward.

**Jay's POV**

One by one, the girls ran through the set, screwing up their lines, making out with their partners, and laughing when they realized how badly they had done. It was comical to watch, but also dreadful because not a single one of them could pull it off.

After CariDee went, I looked around for Bella. She wasn't standing with the other girls.

"Bella!" I called out. I heard a distant sound of acknowledgment. "You're up!" I shouted again. She came from the far side of the bridge, behind the makeup trailers. She hurried over to me and listened to my directions.

On queue, she spewed her lines. They were perfect in every American way possible. Sure, she didn't have the right accent, the pronunciation was right on. She flirted her way toward the actors better than the other girls had and walked over to her partner. I was sure his name was Jake, or something along those lines.

Normally by now, the other girls had taken at least three different cuts. Bella just kept going. Jake seemed almost forceful in the kiss. To me, it became obvious when he gripped the back of her head. The kiss looked powerful—more powerful than either of the twins', who had never kissed anyone before. Her kiss looked more sensual—more sensual than when CariDee sucked face with her partner.

When she stopped kissing, her line was rushed and slightly shaky. Nothing that the camera would really catch.

What surprised me was the ending. After the director cut the scene, Bella walked off the stage, clutching her head.

"Bella?" I asked. She didn't answer. Only her body crumbled slightly and I caught a glimpse of her face. Tears were rolling down her cheeks and I took a few steps forward. More people were behind me now.

"Bella!" I called out, praying for an answer. The girls started calling her name, but strangely, none of us went over to her. I noticed her body rocking back and forth now, and I knew what was coming.

I darted forward and caught her just before she hit the ground. Bella had fainted, and now, she was completely unconscious. No amount of shouting stirred her. Her pulse thrummed lightly, but other than that, she showed no signs of life.

"Get an ambulance!" I shouted. One of the crewmembers spoke frantically into a cell phone, and I gently laid her head in my lap. The girls, especially the twins, were freaking out.

"What's wrong with her?" Michelle shouted. I felt like I was in shock. This had never happened on the show before, and quite frankly, if it ever were to happen, I wished it had been to someone who didn't have as much potential as Bella did.

The ambulance sirens were now audible and the girls only freaked out more. They were shouting at one another, not knowing that to do. When it pulled up, a group of Spanish EMT's came running at me with a stretcher. They started speaking in their foreign language, and the director took over. Jake was standing in the same spot, looking confused and swearing every few seconds. Poor kid. 

I wanted nothing more than to ride to the hospital with her, but I couldn't leave the others here. They loaded her off and sped to the hospital. The majority of the girls had tears in their eyes. The next thing I did was call Tyra. She was just as shocked as I was.

"Oh my god," she said. "Is she going to be okay?" I explained to her the synopsis of what happened and she flipped like the girls had. In truth, we had had other medical problems on the show, even one other in this cycle, but Tyra had never shown as much concern for this.

In her opinion, to be a top model, you had to suck it up and keep going. Unfortunately, this one was unsuckable, and I had the feeling that Bella had been hiding this one for a very long time.

We all tried to keep an eye on her because of her head, but after a while, the worry about it faded. Yes, she still did have a noticeable mark on her head, but we had all grown used to it. I paced the bridge, thinking of what to do next. My thought process was skewered by my phone buzzing in my pocked. I pulled it out and squinted at the I.D.

_Edward._

**AN: Hi guys. Sorry about the wait, I've pretty tangled with school and stuff like that. Anywho, please don't flame too badly for the cliffy. Also, sorry about that very long and obnoxious authors note...yes, I have a habit of forgetting about the filters they put in for lovely hyperlinks like that. **


	14. Chapter 13

**EPOV**

Jay answered on the second ring, and by that time, I was ready to crush my phone. Tyra had called me almost to the point of blubbering. Knowing Tyra, this must have been something bad. I could only make out one word 'Bella'.

As soon as she said her name, I dropped the device. Upon contact with the hardwood floor, the conversation ended, and the battery flew out. I wasted time by putting it back in when I could have used the landline in the room. Dialing furiously, I called Jay.

"Edward," he said.

"What the hell happened?" I growled.

"How did you find out?"

"Just tell me what happened and where she is. _Now!" _There was an awkward pause before he spoke again.

"Edward, is there something you need to tell me?" he asked cautiously.

"Goddamn it Jay!" I shouted into the phone. "What happened?" He sighed.

"I don't know what happened, she was fine one second, performed amazingly, kissed the hell outta her partner and then fell unconscious." My stomach twisted into a painful knot.

"Every detail," I said through my teeth as I pulled the door open and slammed it behind me.

"What do you mean every detail?"

"Tell me every detail that happened." By now I was jamming my key into the car door. Things just weren't going fast enough. Every detail of her accident would only help me to calm myself; at least I would know she wasn't going to die in the ambulance.

"I-I don't remember exactly what happened. I remember her grabbing her head and she was shaking, other than that," he trailed off, obviously finishing his explanation.

"What hospital?" I asked, driving out of the car lot. Jay shouted to some people, asking for someone who spoke English. The small amount of patience that I had was now gone. He asked someone where she had gone. A few seconds later, he spoke directly into the phone.

"They aren't sure exactly where she went, but the ambulance came in the direction of a hospital called Evangélico." He started to give me directions, but I snapped the phone shut and stepped on the gas, blowing the light and pulling over on the curb. I practically threw myself out of the car and flagged down the nearest person.

"Excuse me!" I shouted. Several people turned and looked at me like I had some mental incapacity, but I ignored them and continually shouted until a young woman walked toward me. "Can you speak English?" I asked. She nodded.

"Can I help you sir?" she asked, having a small accent.

"I need directions on how to get the Hospital Evangélico. Please." She nodded and looked around us.

"You're going the wrong way," was the first thing she said. "It's back that way, on the street Camieles. It's hard to miss, just follow the road, don't make any turns until you see the building." I grabbed her hand and shook it.

"Thank you," I said while running back to the car. I left her standing on the curb with a curious expression on her face. Driving more carefully this time, I sped off toward the hospital. When the building came into to view, I thanked the heavens for that young woman. However, parking was a different story.

The closest parking spot that I could find was around the back of the building in a reserved spot. In the event that I got a ticket, it would be paid in full. The doors swung open and I cleared the distance between the front desk and me in a mere second.

"Can I help you?" the nurse behind it asked. Her accent was thick and hard to understand, but it was better than nothing.

"I need to see a patient that was just brought in," I said, enunciating each syllable. She looked down at a clipboard.

" I don't have anything recent on record, sir," she said, flipping though pages.

"She was _just_ brought here," I argued.

"I would have it on record unless they were still in the car."

"Then maybe they're still in the car. Please, this is really important," I begged. She looked behind her and spoke rapidly to another nurse.

"Come with me," she said, turning back. I followed her as she led me through a series of doors. "It's possible that they are filling out paperwork right now for her," she explained. Right before we went through the next door, the nurse grabbed my arm and pulled me to the side. "People are coming through," she said. Right on queue, the swinging doors flew open and a bunch of men pushed through a gurney that was occupied by someone. A Spanish man lay on the gurney, mumbling something incoherently.

"I'm sorry sir, I don't think she's here," the nurse said. Just as I was about to pull my phone out and call Jay again, a small sound made me return the small device back into my pocket. In the distance, there was the far off whir of a siren. Though it sounded different from any siren you would hear in L.A., it was, without a doubt, a siren. Had I really made it here before the ambulance? I didn't drive _that_ crazily.

"I must go," she said, rushing off back toward the counter. Apparently things worked much differently in Spain than they did in the U.S….

The sirens were much louder by now and my anxiety made my hands clammy, as well, as my chest pound. In a few minutes, I could tell the ambulance was in the parking garage and I had to restrain myself to keep from running out to meet it.

I backed away slowly and stopped in the hallway, moving out of the way of any passing people. Everything after that seemed to happen in slow motion; the doors swung open, the Spanish EMT guys wheeled her through, and I moved along side them. One of the men looked at me oddly, but I grabbed Bella's hand, somehow rubbing circles on the back of it while keeping pace with the men.

When we pulled into the room, the man that looked at me earlier started making commands in Catalan. He pointed at me, and struggled to speak English.

"You have to go," he finally got out. I shook my head.

"I'm not leaving," I said, standing my ground. "I need to be here." I'm not sure if it was out of the goodness of his heart or because of my menacing glare, but he backed off and joined the others as they attached several different I.V.'s to her and connected machines. Though I tried to stay out of the way, it ended up being that I blocked most of them from touching her. A few seconds after they hooked the first IV up to her, she rolled her head to the side and her eyebrows pulled together.

Relief coursed through my entire body and I let out a quick gasp. Her eyes fluttered open and she flinched at the light. "Bella?" I asked. "Can you hear me?" She looked over at me and her face crumpled. She made a slight movement and then her head hit the pillow. "What just happened?" I asked one of the guys. Her reached over, checked her pulse and tapped her lightly. Her head swayed and she mumbled something. The man turned back to me.

"Sleep," he said.

Several of the people that were in there left and another doctor came in. He looked much more professional and gave me a weary glance. "The nurses already explained," he said, having no accent at all. My eyes widened at the phenomenon. "May I ask your connection to her?"

I took a few extra seconds to answer. "I'm just a close friend," is what I decided on. He nodded and went over to the machine to check her levels.

"Do you know if anything happened to her that would cause this sort of…event?"

"She fell and hit her head a few weeks back. I'm fairly sure she has a concussion." The doctor leveled his stare at me, quickly turning back to me. "Why did she just pass out again?" I asked, suddenly frantic.

"To be quite honest, without any euphemisms, she's sleeping," he answered, taking a flashlight out of his coat pocket. He gently lifted her eyelids and flashed the light underneath them. "Good lord," he murmured. "She really hit her head."

"Is she going to be okay?" I asked, more like demanded, and held her hand in between the both of mine. He walked over to one of the machines and pulled out a receipt, or a reading of some sort.

"I think she'll be alright, however, she is in serious condition." I gripped the railing on her bed and closed my eyes. "She has a grade three concussion. That I can tell from just looking at her eyes." I fought the urge to swear. "How long ago did she hit her head?"

"Several weeks ago."

"Well, chances are, she won't have any memory loss. The loss of consciousness could be the result of an anxiety-endued migraine. The fact that she's conked out right now would be direct evidence." He walked over the side of her and checked her pulse, timing it with her watch. "That's odd," he mused.

"Odd?" I asked. Each new thing he found out sent spasms of worry though me nervous system.

"Her heart rate is 92 beats per minute. That's not exactly healthy for someone who's sleeping. She really does have a lot going on with her right now." Wordlessly, I shuffled over to a chair and sat down, running my fingers through my hair.

"How long will she need to stay here?" I asked with my voice slightly muffled.

"I would say about two days," he answered. "Just to be safe. If her levels aren't more normal by tomorrow, she'll stay for three." I nodded in understanding expecting him to leave. He didn't.

"I'm sorry to intrude in any way, but your face looks familiar to me," he said. I looked up, confused.

"I don't think I've ever met you before." He nodded.

"I didn't think I had ever met you, but maybe someone related to you. No matter, I'll leave you two to be alone." He left the room and I walked over to her slowly.

"Bella?" I whispered. Her face twitched slightly. Slowly, I ran my fingers down her arm and though back to the first time I saw her. She looked beautiful, and scared, like she didn't know what she was doing here. Not only that, but she didn't know how amazing she really was. My phone buzzed in my pocked.

"Damn it," I muttered, flipping it open. "Hello?" I asked, having not recognized the number.

"Is this Edward?" A female voice asked. I turned my back from Bella and walked to the corner of the room.

"It is," I answered.

"What the hell happened to Bella?" the voice demanded.

"I'm sorry, who's calling me?" I asked, bewildered.

"This is Alice Brandon, her best friend and room mate. Tell me what happened, before things get ugly." My eyes widened. This was _the_ Alice.

"She's fine for the moment," I started. "Bella has a serious concussion." Alice snorted.

"That's just like her, clumsy girl." There was an awkward pause. "I'm sorry for the introduction, I was just worried," she said.

"Don't worry about it, I would be too." Today was definitely a day of all days. "May I ask how you got my number?"

"Oh, I got a call from the producers, they told me Bella was in the hospital. I ended up on the phone with Tyra Banks, who passed the phone to Jay Manuel who gave me your number." I shook my head slowly, embarrassed at the thought of what she put them through.

"Listen, I'm on my way to the air port right now. When Bella is up, tell her I'm on my way." I agreed and she hung up the phone. When I turned back to Bella my heart jumped. She looked so beautiful; so fragile. No one like Bella should have to go through this.

For the next three hours, I sat next to Bella and waited for her to make some sign of life. The monitor next to her beeped too quickly, or so it seemed, but it kept a pace, and that was comforting. Finally, she rolled slightly and opened her eyes.

"Edward," she mumbled.

"Yes," I answered, overjoyed. "Thank god." She looked despaired.

"I'm so sorry," she rolled out. Her words were slightly slurred. "I didn't mean to-to—I didn't mean to kiss him like that. It just happened, and oh god," she put her head against the pillows and winced.

"Calm down Bella," I said gently. "Don't worry about anything that happened, just keep yourself calm, you aren't in the greatest shape right now." She looked over at me.

"I need to tell you something," she mumbled.

"Anything," I answered, taking her hand in mine. She closed her eyes slowly, still exhausted.

"I don't ever want to kiss anyone ever again." My stomach dropped. This was exactly what I feared. "I don't want to ever kiss anyone but _you_." Without meaning to, I tightened my grasp on her hand. "Edward, I love you," she whispered, closing her eyes again. She tilted her head in a way that presented all opportunities.

I leaned my head down and gently pressed my lips against hers. She smiled underneath me and deepened it by pressed herself harder against me and slowly parting her lips. When I leaned away from her, her eyes were open and she smiled. "I love you," she said once more, before falling asleep.

**Hey guys. Sorry for the wait, I've been a little...preoccupied. You see, I'm going to Alaska for a little while to visit with my dad. So, the time I could have spent writing, I was packing instead and doing crazy stuff like that. **

**Anyway, here's the next chapter. My apologies to anyone who lives in Spain...I don't know if the hospital I picked is geographically correct for the area or anything like that, but it gets the point across. So, I hope you guys enjoyed this one!**


	15. Chapter 14

**BPOV**

When I woke up, for a moment, I thought I had died. All I could see were bright lights, but when I turned my head, I saw his face. Edward looked luminescent in a way, but seeing him amidst all of the painful lights only scared me. I don't know if I fainted or what, but as quickly as I saw him, he vanished. The lights turned off again.

Then I woke up, and this time, I stayed awake a little longer. Long enough to tell Edward what really was on my mind. I loved him. I couldn't remember anything after kissing Jacob except for pain.

Kissing Edward without a sense of suppression or guilt was indescribable. Smiling against his lips was like a feeling of catharsis. Unfortunately, a tidal wave of exhaustion attacked me right after and I passed out again. According to Edward, I slept for another three hours.

When I woke up again, Edward looked slightly anxious. "Hey," I said happily, yet groggily. Apparently I was heavily doped on morphine.

"Hi," he said taking my hand. "There's something I forgot to tell you when you first woke."

"Okay," I said, waiting for him to spill.

"Alice called me." I was shocked.

"Alice? _My_ Alice? You're kidding right?" Alice could be relentless and cruel at time, and I got the feeling that this wasn't good.

"Yes, your Alice. And she's on her way here right now." At that second, I almost choked on air.

"What!?" I half-shrieked. "Why would she be coming here?" Edward suddenly looked exasperated.

"Bella, you're borderline intensive care right now. You definitely aren't stable. The producers called Alice, and Alice harassed the judges until she got my number and told me she's coming here." Though I couldn't see it, I'm sure my face went white.

"Oh, Edward, I'm so sorry," I whispered. Nobody should have to face the wrath of a determined Alice. As wonderful as she may be, to put it bluntly, she's crazy.

"Don't be. Seeing someone you're close with will do you some good right now. My guess is she will be here in somewhere around ten hours," he explained. Edwards phone buzzed in his pocket and he sighed.

"One sec." He turned around and flipped it open. I couldn't exactly make out what he was saying, but his body language told me that something wasn't right, and I was sure that the morphine had no affect on this. When he returned his phone to his pocket, Edward turned back to me slowly, and his face was grim.

"They're on their way," he said quietly. I could tell me meant the judges. I waited for him to continue. "They will figure it out if I'm here still. Jay half guessed it on the phone before I was even here. Right now, they think I'm at a restaurant in another city."

"Edward," I said shakily. In a split second, I had made a decision that ripped my insides apart. "Go." He shook his head.

"I'm not leaving, Bella, I can't."

"Yes, you can, go." It was getting harder and harder to keep my eyes open, and my body wanted to sleep.

"No." I took a deep breath and mustered up the strength to say it.

"I'm not going to let you throw your life away. Just leave, I don't want you here." For a second, he looked hurt, and I was sure I felt a thousand times worse than he did about this, but he absorbed what I said, and walked toward the door.

No matter how much I loved him and needed him, I would not jeopardize everything that Edward had worked for in his life. I didn't know if we would ever see each other again after that. The judges could have told me to go home as soon as they got here. He looked back at me before leaving the room and stopped.

"I love you," he whispered before finally leaving and walking down the hall. By the time he was out of the hospital, it hit me that I may have made a mistake. He was willing to throw everything away, but instead, I told him off. I bantered back in forth between it for a few minutes, but my eyes would not stay open anymore.

The closed on their own, but I was still awake enough to hear a light knock on the door. I grunted and heard footsteps.

"Bella?" a female voice asked. From the British accent, I could tell it was Twiggy.

"My eyes won't open," I said out loud, hearing how choked my voice was with emotion. There was the sound of soft laughter.

"That's understandable," Jay said. "You still aren't forgiven for scaring us all half to death though." I winced.

"Bella, we are still going to include you in the panel," Tyra said. "We've set up a wiring system so you can see the panel going on through the T.V." I felt like I had been crushed by a weight of some sort, but I couldn't tell if it was because of elation or horror. I was still in this competition. The rest of their visit was mainly small talk, but I never managed to open my eyes. As soon as they left, I fell asleep.

Thankfully, I didn't remember anything that I dreamed about. I was sure it would be a nightmare, or something undesirable. What had I just done?

Something in the room woke me up, and I opened my eyes to a familiar sounding sigh. Alice.

"Oh, Bella! I landed early!" she exclaimed. She hurried over to the side of my bed and started to throw her arms around, but stopped. "Guess I can't do that."

I smiled weakly and took in the sight of her. She was glowing for some odd reason, but at the time, I assumed it was because I was highly medicated. After the initial awkward silence, she relaxed.

"I should have guessed something like this would have happened. And that reminds me, I haven't heard from you in like a week!"

"Er, sorry," I mumbled. Alice still was too buoyant.

"Anyway, when the producers called, I almost had a heart attack. So, I called a few people until I got a hold of Edward…who should be here. Where is he?" she asked. I felt like I would burst into tears.

"He had to go…do something," I said quietly. She nodded, onto the next subject already.

"Bella, I have some news for you," she said slowly, suddenly serious. I looked over at her groggily. The glow was still there. Her hand gripped the railing tightly and she cleared her throat once. Twice. The third time I looked down at her hand and saw the giant rock that covered her finger.

"Oh…my…god." Was all I could mutter. She was squealing and smiling from ear to ear.

"Jasper asked me to marry him!" She waited a nanosecond. "And I said yes!"

"I can see that," I stuttered. "Wow…congratulations." She bounced forward and kissed my cheek.

"I'm so happy. I can't imagine spending my life with anyone but him! Alice Whitlock…." By now, I was ready to kick her out of the room. I had no idea of how to fix what I said to Edward, and on top of that, I had to pee. "So…you'll be my maid of honor, right?" I sighed, not wanting to say anything else that I would regret.

"Of course, Alice." She squealed and jumped happily. A few seconds later, she looked upset.

"Oh my god…I can't believe I just did that! You're in the hospital and I'm bragging about a wedding!? What the hell is wrong with me? Oh… I'm so sorry." She seriously needed to leave the room now, and she seemed to get the message.

"I'll be back," she said quickly and left the room in a hurry. With a sigh, I relaxed into my pillows and cursed myself repetitively. _What had I done? _

If I left tonight, it was all over.

I would never see Edward again, things would be left off on a horrible note, nothing would make sense, and I would hate myself forever.

I had just told Edward that I loved him—that I didn't want to kiss anyone but him for the rest of my life—but right after that, I tell him to get away from me? But I did it for him…

Alice didn't come back that night. I wasn't expecting her to—Alice is the type to wallow for a little bit too long. She's hard on herself, that's for sure.

One of the nurses came into the room. I knew what she was doing. She fiddled around with the stations on the TV for a few minutes until the screen went from static to a blue screen. I thanked her on her way out and sure enough, the blue screen tapped out a few times and stationed on a direct video of the judging panel.

All of the girls were standing there in their usual spots, and on queue, they turned and waved at me. They couldn't see me back, thankfully. Tyra and the judges said hi as well, but the judging table wasn't shown on the screen. The judging began. CariDee was called forward first. Edward didn't speak at all, only mumbled words of agreement every now and then. It hurt to hear his voice.

After watching her commercial, the judges weren't too pleased. "This really isn't your best work, but honestly, perfection was not expected in this filming."

Amanda went forward after that, and the judges got a kick out of the fact that she couldn't kiss her partner. It was the same with Michelle. Eugena was called forward and congratulated on a job well done, and then they called Jaeda.

She did badly according to what the judges said. She knew it too. Then, the judges watched mine. The scary part was they didn't say anything to me afterward. Instead, they had everyone leave so they could deliberate.

The TV tapped out and I stared at a blue screen, my chest pounding. The nurse came back in looking distraught. "Careful," she warned. I nodded and waited for another fifteen minutes until the screen flickered back again.

Tyra went through the normal explanation about what we have to do if we go home and then hammered down the list. Eugena was called up first and she happily took her place in the safety zone. Next came Amanda, followed by Michelle. CariDee was called in, but given a stern look from Tyra. Then they both laughed.

The whole thing looked staged. And worse than that, the only two people left were Jaeda and myself.

**OMC...I'm so sorry for the longest wait ever. That wasn't very cool of me at all...**


	16. Chapter 15

**BPOV**

The camera tapped out for a few seconds and the screen blurred with static. Tyra's face was too solemn for comfort. My heart tapped out the words I was thinking:

This is it. It's over.

Tyra began speaking, and my heart only began to beat faster. This probably wasn't very healthy for me.

"I have two very beautiful and talented women before me, but I only hold one photo in my hands." She seemed to be speaking much slower than usual. The camera was aimed perfectly; all I could see besides Jaeda and Tyra was Edward's full face and the corner of J's.

"One of you," she continued, "takes beautiful photo's, but is unwilling to accept the change that was expect from her. We can't be sure if something like a kiss for a commercial will hold her back from performing well." Tyra turned toward me, her penetrating eyes were softer now. Those only made me feel worse. Those were sympathy eyes. I was going home.

"The other, takes stunning photos and is just about everything we look for in a model, but will her health keep her from being as amazing as she could be? Truth be told, it is expected for a model to work through a cold without complaint, but a severe concussion that could result in a coma and even brain damage?"

She stepped back and looked down. I knew what was coming now. In a few seconds, she would be sliding the picture up and I would be going home. Tyra turned toward me with a small smile.

"Bella, you'd better get well soon, because we'll be expecting you back."

My mouth dropped open and my eyes zoned in on Jaeda. I could barely breath. Small tears were forming in Jaeda's eyes and they trailed slowly down her cheeks.

Tyra had her arms wrapped around her. "You are absolutely beautiful, but you have to let go of your feelings for a shoot. Don't let this competition stop you from being great."

Something small tugged at my chest, and soon, it ripped open. Sobs wracked my chest and tears poured down my cheeks. I loved him so much. Too much. He was my life, my whole entire life. Instead of my heart spelling out my departure, it spelled out his name.

Edward.

* * *

My sobs were loud enough to block out the sound of the heart monitor, which had been out of control for the past minute. My nurse came bolting into the room and stopped short when she saw me.

"I'm so sorry," she said, and walked over to me. Apparently, she thought I was going home. "You must calm down though."

"I'm staying," I choked out. "I'm not leaving." She looked at me like I was crazy and then injected something into my tube.

"Sedation," she told me, and left the room. The drug slowly took effect, but it couldn't control my mind.

What was I going to do now? I wanted nothing more than to throw my arms around Edward and hold him as tight as I possibly could. I wanted him around me; I wanted him to be here comforting me instead of that damn sedation.

I cried softly now, my heart rate as steady as it could be. My eyes occasionally fluttered and I fought to keep them open. A small part of me was waiting to see him standing in the doorway with a crooked smile.

The nurse stopped by occasionally, but I rolled my eyes past her. I was unable to speak anyway.

I don't know when I fell asleep. It felt like hours later, but I suspected it was more like minutes due to the situation. He was never far from the corner of my mind, even in my dreams. Every word I thought conjured up a different image of him. It was tantalizing.

I woke to a small sound. My eyes shot open, and without meaning to, I whispered his name. Alice looked confused.

"Did you say something?" she asked.

"No," I mumbled, feigning exhaustion. I was devastated. He wasn't here. She reached across and grabbed my hand.

"I'm proud of you Bells. You made it this far, and you're still here. There isn't a part of me that doubts that you will be America's Next Model." She must have thought that my watery eyes were from her speech.

"Thanks," I croaked. A sudden idea passed through my mind. "Alice?" I asked. She perked up.

"Yes?"

"Can you get me a piece of paper and a pen?" I knew that my morphine was wearing off, but at the time, I didn't care at all. This was probably my only shot at fixing things. Alice came back into the room with a piece of printer paper and a pen.

"I snagged this from the lady at the front desk," she snickered. Even through my dark mood, I could tell that she was happier with a rock on her finger. I thanked her concentrated on holding the pen steadily in my hand.

It shook for the first few seconds, but I got a decent grip pressed it to the paper. My eyes welled up again and a small tear trickled down my cheek.

In larger and much more scraggily letters than I would normally write in, I scrawled 'IM SORRY' across the top of the page. A few more tears were balancing on the bridge of my nose.

"Bella?" Alice asked, concerned. "Should I call a nurse?" I cleared my throat.

"No," I said, my voice thick. "Just a head ache." I folded the paper several times until it was molded into a square. "Can you do something for me?"

She scooted even closer.

"Sure I can," she replied. I closed my eyes.

"Whenever you get a chance, stop by the hotel and give this to Edward. Please." When I opened my eyes, she had the note in her hands and was staring at me curiously.

"Of course I will, but _why_?"

"Uh…Edward just has something of mine," I said. It wasn't a complete lie either. She blinked in confusion, but put the note in her back pocket.

"Sure. I'll go now, I wanted to go look at a shop anyway. I'll pick you up something, kay?"

I nodded painfully and rested against the pillow. My last chance at making things right now rested in the back pocket of Alice's designer jeans. It felt real, and then completely fake when the nurse injected yet another painkiller into my IV.

In my entire life, I couldn't remember crying so much, or so hard. I couldn't remember feeling so bad, or hating myself like this, or loving someone so much. If Edward was hurt, or even felt a small fraction of what I was feeling right now, then I would have wished that everything that happened between us was just a dream, but secretly, I would rather have loved Edward and no one else ever again than never have met him.

Every time I thought profusely, I passed out. I wasn't surprised when I jolted awake suddenly. There was no one in the room, just me. My body was beginning to go numb from not moving for so long. Three days of this?

The clock across from the bed told me it was just past 7:30 at night. Alice had left some time around four. My stomach felt rock solid, even though I hadn't eaten in a long time. The only other thing in the room besides the furniture, monitors and myself was an uneaten tray of food.

I felt miserable. I hated myself with such passion; it could easily have become a sport. The one thing that went well in my life, and _I_ was the one to ruin it. _I_, for once, was the one to cause someone else pain. That was evident enough from the last look of Edward's eyes that I got.

I wanted to go back to sleep. That way I could at least forget about the situation. Of course, the one time I actually wanted to be sleeping in a hospital bed, my body wouldn't let me. The mattress felt like a cement block and my pillows suddenly made me fidget.

This just wasn't going to work.

* * *

**EPOV**

It felt like my heart stopped beating. Ever step that I took out of the hospital was in a daze. I had prepared myself to give everything I worked for up to be with her. And she had pushed me away? Why?

A small part of me felt that this was too good to be true. For years, I had pushed away every girl that tried to get close to me. A few dates here and there and I was done. No one had been special to me, or made a difference in my life. No one had literally taken my breath away, or left me speechless. No had ever made me feel as if I would give my life for them; no had made me want to cry.

My throat locked up and it felt like something was lodged in my air passages. Driving was difficult, but not impossible. I stumbled into my hotel room and dropped myself onto the bed. When I closed my eyes, all I saw was her face.

Bella's beautiful face was tormenting me. I loved it more than any other. I wanted it more than any other. Her personality, her spirit, made me want to give mine up for hers.

I allowed myself to whisper her name before I fell into a still dream of her face. Without Bella, I was nothing. I would have happily given everything up to be with her, and I still would have.

A small part of me was hoping to hear a small knock at the door and hear her voice on the other end, but I knew that couldn't happen. She wasn't even able to walk right now. An even larger part of me wanted to race back to the hospital and cradle her in my arms. In fact, I wanted nothing more.

But she didn't want me.

I woke up, ironically, to a small knock on the door. I jumped up, suddenly elated. Then I remembered Bella's predicament and calmed considerably. At the door was Alice.

"Alice?" I asked, confused. She smiled.

"Hi Edward, uh, I guess you have something of Bella's and she sent me here with a note," she said. My heart skipped a beat.

"O-okay," I whispered, trying not to sound to raspy. She reached into her back pocket and pulled out a white little square.

"Here," she said and handed it to me.

"Thanks," I said. She smiled and walked back down the hallway and into the elevator. My hands shook as I unfolded the note.

Even from the clear disorder of it, I recognized Bella's handwriting.

'IM SORRY'.

* * *

Before, I may have been ashamed to admit it, but after reading the words, I let go of everything that I had kept pent up. Ever single ounce of worry that I felt while Bella and I hid ourselves for the other judges, the fear after Bella's accident, and the unbearable pain after her rejection. Hot tears burned my face, but I accepted them. The lump in my throat was slowly going away.

Without hesitation, or caring who saw me, I walked back to the parking garage, took the car and drove to the hospital. Even if this wasn't what I thought it was, I still needed to see her face one last time.

I drove much more carefully, and made it to the hospital in twenty minutes. It was dark outside, almost eight o'clock. I wondered if she would be sleeping. How would she take to waking up with me there? Chances were she was highly medicated right now; she would have to leave the hospital soon and the least amount of movement would speed up her recovery.

My knees felt weak as I walked into the front doors, but I took a deep breath, prepared myself for the worst, and walked over to the front desk to sign in as a late visitor.

**BPOV**

I was exhausted, and it wasn't from pain medications. My emotions had drained all energy from my body. I couldn't even keep my eyes open, let alone think straight.

It seemed as though all I had been doing for the past several hours, more than 24 for sure, was sleeping. I wasn't sure if it was because I just wanted to forget what I had done, or that I wanted to dream and see his face, but I found that sleep was my escape.

The situation was beneficial in a few ways; Alice took my dead-like mood as depression from being in the hospital for so long. She knew I hated being any where near a heart rate monitor.

I had yet another empty dream that started out pretty good. Edward's face was like a stamp in my mind. I imagined that I was lying in the clearing behind our house in L.A. I imagined that Edward was lying next to me, and we were both happy.

After that, everything went blank. I didn't remember anything, it was all like a black screen. I jolted awake, breathing heavily, yet again on the brink of tears. My eyes were constantly watery. The nurse didn't quite understand why.

I sat up much to quickly and groaned. My entire body felt like it had been electrocuted. The room spun for a few minutes and I lowered myself gently onto the pillows. I turned my head and looked around the room.

There was a chair right next to the bed. Edward hadn't been here; that was from Alice. She was going to show me all the wedding plans they had come up with, which weren't many.

Alice's main focus was on our dresses. Inwardly, I winced that the thought. Me in a bridesmaids dress? The Maid of Honor? With a sexy up do? Alice, thankfully, was against the whole 'make the bridesmaids look horrible so all the attention is on me' gig.

I stared across the room and out the window. I was dark outside, almost black. What time was it? The clock was on the other side of the room, away from where I could see.

This room was so badly set up.

Though my head pounded, and I knew that walking was stupid right now, I just didn't care. Who cares if I go into a coma? I wouldn't mind that too much right now. The only thing I'd be missing was Alice's wedding.

I slid my feet over the side of the bed and steadied myself. This wouldn't be too hard. When my feet touched the ground, tingles shot through my muscles. It had been a while since I walked. I heaved myself toward the chair and clung to myself. This was stupid.

"I hate myself," I whispered, a truly cliché expression, especially coming from me. After dragging my legs past the table, I caught a quick glimpse at the clock.

It was almost ten o'clock at night. Alice should be at home now, not sitting next to me while I slept, I thought to myself.

The trip back to my bed was agonizing. Not only was it painful to move, but that also meant I would have to sit back in that horrible contraption called a bed. With my eyes squinched shut, I pulled myself across the floor and fumbled for the bed.

The stiff sheets worked well for my to claw my way back onto the pillows. I was sure I looked like a complete idiot. I didn't even know what I looked like right now. My hair was probably a mess, my face was probably even paler than it normally was, I knew I didn't exactly smell clean. I was borderline rank.

Either Alice was thinking of me, or she just forgot the bottle of lotion on the table next to the bed. I reached over and pulled the small bottle toward me. It was cherry and almond scented, definitely not my favorite scent, but it would do.

Quickly, and as inconspicuously as possible, I rubbed the lotion all over my body. The scent was so strong; it overpowered my senses and, of course, gave me a slight headache.

Without thinking, I hurled the bottle across the room. Yes, my head spun, and yes, my aim was horrible. The bottle ricocheted off the plastic window and clattered to the floor. I sank my head into my hands and concentrated on breathing.

I really, truly, hated myself. What happened next was unexpected. It seemed impossible as it happened. This was probably just another dream, right?

While my head was buried in my palms, I quickly began to think I was going crazy. I was definitely hearing things.

"Bella?" An incredibly beautiful sounding voice said. My lip began to tremble.

"Oh my god," I mumbled. My voice shook.

"Bella, it's me," the voice said. I couldn't lift my head out of my hands. "I- I got your note, from Alice? Do you remember that?"

"I'm crazy," I said, a little clearer. "The dreams were bad enough, but honestly, now I'm hearing voices?" My eyes began to water again and my shoulders were shaking. Then I felt it: someone's hands on my exposed cheeks.

"Shhh," the voice comforted. "I'm here now, you have nothing to be afraid of, and no, you aren't going crazy. Would you believe me if I said I loved you?" I struggled to pull my head up, but it was too heavy.

"Bella?"

* * *

"I can't lift my head up," I whispered. His gently hands lifted the weight out of my hands and I can honestly say I almost died. I never thought I would see his face again in person.

"Edward?" I asked. "That's not you. No, no, no, I wrecked everything, you're supposed to be working and happy and falling for someone who deserves you and doesn't mess things up by being stupid. This isn't right," I babbled. I was in hysterics.

He wrapped his arms around my shoulders and pulled me into him. His voice sounded a little different, thicker somehow.

"Bella, I love you so much, I would give anything for you. I know you did what you did because you thought it was right, but I'm never leaving your side again, unless you honestly say those words again when you aren't heavily medicated."

My head fit perfectly under his chin. I felt his skin on my forehead, so this must be real, right? Those were arms that were wrapped around me, so this had to have been a reality.

"I'm sorry," I said into his shoulder. "I'm sorry," I repeated.

"Shhh, don't say that." He rocked up back and forth gently. "I'm never going to leave again. The judges can find out about us, I don't care. I'd give anything for you, anything."

My eyelids fluttered and his arms tightened. A strange hiccupping noise forced its way out of my chest. His shirt was soaked from where my face had rested.

"I thought—I thought I would never see you again, or hear your voice. I thought I had ruined everything, because I'm stupid like that sometimes," my words were slurred. "I thought you were gone forever," I whimpered.

"No, no. I could never leave you. I love you more than anything else in this world. Before, it was an extreme love, and I wasn't ready for the shock of it. Now, it's more than a love, it's a necessity, unfathomable. I live for you and only you." He brushed his hand over the back of my head.

Though I no longer believed I was dreaming, I felt as though I didn't deserve any of this.

"Did you know I'm staying?" I asked. He chuckled.

"I was there, Bella, remember?"

"Oh…yeah." He shifted his weight a little and I could tell his arms were strained from holding me. I scooted over in the bed and patted the space next to me. "Come here," I said.

He laid next to me on the hard mattress and I turned my face into his chest. The nurses would probably have a fit, but at the moment, none of that mattered. He was here.

"Bella?" he asked again.

"Hmm?" I mumbled, on the brink of sleep.

"Alice said I had something of yours…" he trailed off. I opened my eyes.

"Two things actually."

"Really? Care to explain?" He asked. I blinked slowly and swallowed.

"You have my heart and my soul. They only belong to you. We'll just have to work around the other judges."

**AN: okay, i fully accept all of the flaming...even though i've gotten plenty over the past...yeah. saying sorry doesn't really cut it, and i know...this chapter is kinda sappy, but this story kinda needs some of it, don't you think? well, your honest opinion would be greatly appreciated **


	17. Chapter 16

BPOV

Halfway through my second day at the hospital, I was ready to heave myself out the window. I hadn't showered and my hair felt like it was plastered to my head. I tried not to sniff myself in fear of passing out again. Edward couldn't visit. We both knew that people would catch on if he did. Alice had practically moved into my room. I encouraged her to get out as much as possible.

"Really, Alice, you don't need to sit in this depressing room with me. I'll be out of here soon enough." She would roll her eyes at me and insist on staying, but I suspected she went out shopping whenever I would fall asleep. She probably just hid the bags somewhere. Most likely under the bed where I couldn't see them. The nurses wouldn't even let me _pee_ by myself, so Alice being there was extremely helpful to my sanity, and my dignity. A few times, she badgered me about Edward: what was the note I gave him? Is there something going on between us? Each time I denied any accusations and casually looked away. It seemed to work.

I almost cried out with joy when the doctor came to visit me again. "Your charts are normal," he explained. "You've had enough stability for the past few days, so I think it's safe for you to go home." Alice squealed and clapped. I thanked him and tried not to jump out of the bed. "It doesn't mean that you can go jumping off of cliffs, you still need to take it easy," he warned. I agreed to keep it safe for a while and then began searching the room for my clothes.

"Bella, you don't seriously think I'm going to let you leave this place in the same clothes that you arrived in?" Alice asked. I glared at her and looked under the bed. Sure enough, several bags for different stores were shoved under there.

"You have _got_ to be kidding me," I muttered. Swiftly, she reached under the mattress and plucked a bag out from underneath. She ignored my protests.

"Well...since you haven't shaved in a while, I'm guessing you'll be most comfortable in jeans." She tossed a dark blue bundle at me. "Annnnd," she said and she rummaged through the bag, "this." She tossed a cream colored stream of silk at me. I sighed and held the blouse in front of me. It was exactly like something that Alice would force me into wearing: a flowy top with a deep v-neck that was garnished with lace. It was beautiful...just not something I would choose to wear while I looked and felt disgusting.

"Try not to look like I'm holding a gun to your head, will you?" she asked and shook her head.

"I'm sorry," I apologized. "Thank you for getting me clothes, but right now, the only thing I want to wear is—"

"Sweats and a t-shirt. I know. But you're in a big girl modeling competition now and sweats and a t-shirt won't fly when you're in the predicament that you're in right now." She closed the door to the room and began to help me out of the notorious backless gown.

I silently rejoiced when I felt the material of the jeans against my skin. Anything other than the stiff cotton that I had been stuck in. I slipped the blouse over my head and Alice's waiting hands tied a neat bow in the back. She pulled a comb out of nowhere and started to spray some sort of liquid onto the roots of my hair.

"Don't worry, I'm gonna fix this," she muttered. She was much gentler than she normally would have been. I felt her twist certain sections of my hair and pull other parts up. Then she sighed in frustration and dropped her hands.

"That's as good as it's gonna get," she grumbled. I peeked in the mirror and saw that my hair was pulled up into some sort of fashionably messy bun and it didn't look nearly as dirty as it felt. After checking out, Alice walked me over to the car she had rented. I groaned.

"What?" she asked, looking nervous.

"How much money did this trip cost you?" I asked. She rolled her eyes.

"Honestly, Bella, I would have paid a lot more to come here. Making sure you're okay is more important to me than an ATM card. Now get in," she commanded. I obliged and slid into the seat, buckling the seat belt around myself.

"Where are you staying?" I asked suddenly. "Are planning on going back anytime soon?" She shrugged.

"Well...Jasper and I have a lot of planning to do. I should probably get a flight back sometime between today and tomorrow. Plus...I don't think the producers will let me stay in the house with you and the other models. I wouldn't be very nice to them anyway." I nodded, dreading what Alice would say to the models if she ever met them.

"You're right..." I said, glumly. Alice was the only part of reality that had surrounded me for the past few days. Edward, as always, felt unreal. He was my God, but his perfections made him seem so...inhuman.

I didn't want her to go.

"Oh, don't be upset," Alice said. "Time flies when you're planning a wedding and kicking ass in a top-model competition." She nudged me playfully. I smirked and looked out the

window. The cultural diversity didn't seem to phase me. "So, I got a chance to meet that Jake guy you were on set with," she said. I winced. "Poor kid," she mumbled. "He came to visit but you were sleeping."

"What did you say to him?" I asked, hoping she wasn't rude.

"Not much, he sat with me for a few minutes, told me what happened and then left." She bit back a smile. I eyed her curiously. She didn't say anything.

"Spit it out," I demanded. She burst out laughing and shook the car.

"He must be one hell of a kisser!" I glared at her, mortified.

"Oh _shut up._" The beauty of being Alice's best friend was it was impossible to be angry with her for too long. If fact, it was impossible for me to be angry with _anyone _for too long, but Alice allowed shorter periods of disapproval.

She seemed to know where she was driving, so I didn't bother to try and remember where the house was. She suddenly pulled over into an empty parking lot and turned to car off. She turned in her seat to face me with a raised eyebrow.

"Bella, do you think I'm stupid?" she asked.

"No..." I trailed off.

"Or have you just forgotten about what a horrible liar you are?" I choked a little. She sighed and shook her head.

"Honestly, I didn't know you had it in you...a _secret affair_?"

I shrieked. "It is _not _an affair!" I protested. "I love him Alice." She laughed triumphantly.

"Gotchya," she said and stuck her tongue out. "And to be honest, I wouldn't have guessed anything from hanging around Edward, he's pretty good...but no guy should look so broken and relieved at the same time when I go to his hotel room to deliver a note. And come on, are you in third grade? You sent him a _note_?"

I sank lower in the seat. Damn Alice. "That's not fair," I hissed.

"Awww, I think it's cute," she teased.

"I kept you and Jasper a secret from your mother until she walked in on the two of you, so you had better keep your mouth shut," I threatened. She laughed, hopefully at the memory, and nodded.

"I won't tell anyone," she said, "but I hate it when you even try to keep things from me. It's not cool."

Saying goodbye to Alice wasn't hard. I knew I would see her soon, and I was a little relieved to know that she wouldn't be around to have any conversations with the other judges. She wasn't known to let things slip...but you never know.

The house seemed to be empty when I walked inside. "Hello?" I called out. No answer. I was still surprised by the beauty of the house. While the house in LA was sophisticated by the latest technologies and the luxurious space, this house was more intricate, it had more than enough space for us and was rich in the Spanish culture. I loved it.

My bed was exactly how I had left it, unmade with my pillows strewn across it, the sheets twisted like I had attempted to rip them apart. Before my stay at the hospital, I had been restless, unable to sleep. It wasn't such a big surprise. I didn't know how long the girls would be gone for, but I used the vacancy to my advantage and decided there wasn't a better time to take a shower.

I took my time, washing my hair twice, shaving with extra care, scrubbing my body until I was sure every bit of hospital stink was gone. The house was still empty when I finished, but I dressed quickly anyway. I thought about maybe blow drying my hair, but before I had made up my mind, the front door clicked open. I peeked my head around the doorway and saw Amanda, closely followed by Michelle. Amanda looked up and squealed.

"Bella!" I waved and smiled lightly. _Here goes._

"Wait a minute guys," CarriDee warned. "She just got out of the hospital, don't charge." They passed me around like a porcelain doll. I sighed.

"Jeez, I'm not a glass plate," I complained. "I'm fine." Apparently, they took my word for it because as soon as everyone had their bags down, they were asking me to cook for them. _Just like home, _I thought. Alice and Jasper always begged me to cook for them. I didn't mind.

"What did I miss?" I asked Eugenia. She didn't appear to be very fond of me.

"Just the go sees, which wasn't much," she answered. I was glad; I would have done horribly at them. Things had gone back to normal after a couple of hours, and everyone was in a better mood because they had food in their stomachs. I waited on edge for the Tyra Mail that I knew would be coming. Sure enough, it came just when I was ready to pass out.

Bull Riding. That's what the photo shoot _had _to be. The context of the Tyra Mail's always gave away what we were doing. There was no doubt about this one; we were doing something with a bull. I just hoped it was mechanical. I crawled into bed and passed out dreading the next morning.

We woke up and seemed to share the same look on our faces. We were terrified. The car ride was awkward and we were all exhausted from waking up so early. My stomach churned as the van came to a stop. It had stopped in front of a colosseum.

"Damn," Eugenia whispered. The huge walls towered over us. We clumped together and walked out in to the middle of the dirt circle and waited. I felt tiny being so far down.

"Ladies!" A familiar voice called. We looked over to see J. come out from behind a door, clad in a matadors outfit. We all waved at him and cheered. "Long time no see, Bella," he commented. "Are you okay?"

"Yep, I'm fine," I said. He winked at me and then explained what we would be doing.

"Today we're doing a Next Top Model first. You lovely ladies will be modeling with a live bull!" he said. On queue, three men pulled an angry looking bull out from behind a wall that I had failed to see. My knees shook slightly. Then, they let go of the rope that had been holding the animal back, and it whipped around in rage. "Let's go!" J. shouted, running away from it. We followed closely and raced into the safety of the hair and makeup stations.

As usual, they dressed me in ridiculous clothes and gaudy makeup. It looked disgusting to me, but I guess it was appealing through a camera lens. The only thing that I had left to do was wait. When J. called my name out, I passed Eugenia, who looked relieved and terrified at the same time.

"Now, Bella," J. warned. "There is no need to be afraid, you won't be harmed. When you hear the men out there tell you to run, you need to hurry behind the safety wall. The photographer will be right in front of it." I nodded and stepped out into the dirt, almost forgetting what he had just said to me.

The photographer didn't say much to me. I only hoped that my fear was not evident on my face. I tried to over exaggerate ferocity, hoping it would mask my terror. Behind me, the bull whipped around, snarling. At least it stayed far away from me. "Alright," the photographer said. "Thanks Bella." I walked away stiffly, waiting for my nerves to unclench. I walked back into hair and makeup and found my clothes. I pulled off the costume and replaced it with my jeans and t-shirt. It only took me a minute to track down a few napkins so I would wipe the paint off of my face. Everyone around me was busy, running around and barking orders at each other. The bull must have gotten on their nerves too.

I discretely walked down an empty corridor and found a quiet place to sit. The craziness was starting to bug me. I rested my head against the cold wall, and closed my eyes, trying desperately to relax. Before I even got close to it, I felt someone's hand grab mine and pull me up. My eyes flew open in shock, but as soon as they were open, I threw them around the person in front of me.

I crushed my body against Edward's, surprised that he was here, but overjoyed nonetheless. He held me with an intensity that matched mine. "I'm sorry," he whispered in my ear. "I didn't want to wait until tonight to see you."

"Neither did I," I said back. He wound his arms around my waist until I pulled his face up and pressed my lips against his. I didn't want to let him go, and I wouldn't have had it not been for the loud bursts of laughter that echoed off of the walls. The girls must have been done. I heard Edward sigh.

"You should go," he said, loosening his grip on me.

"I don't want to," I complained. He laughed lightly and kissed my forehead.

"I know, but you should." I squeezed his hand and obliged, hurrying down the hall and almost running into a makeup artist. He gave me a weird look, but I ignored him and found Michelle.

"Where were you?" she asked.

"I was looking for the bathroom," I said, thinking quickly, rejuvenated by Edward.

"Did you find it?"

I shrugged. "Used a bush." She laughed and put her arm around me. The car ride back was much better. The girls talked and gossiped with one another. I was euphoric and clung to the feelings that I had just experienced, trying to relive it. The sudden thought occurred to me about marriage. I knew I would marry him in a heartbeat. All he had to do was ask.

"What are you all smiley about?" CariDee asked. I looked over at her, startled.

"Nothing," I said "I'm just glad that's over." She agreed. Oddly, I couldn't wait for eliminations. As soon as we got home, I began to get ready for tonight, curling my hair and making an attempt at putting on makeup. I dug through my bags, knowing that Alice had packed a few dresses in there. I needed to look my best tonight, and it wasn't just for judging's sake.

I found a small red dress that flowed around me when I wore it. It was just tight enough to accentuate my curves, and it even showed off a little cleavage. The others scrambled around at the last minute, almost fighting with each other. I simply pulled on a pair of flats and waited. The twins gawked at me when they saw how I was dressed.

"You look really nice," Amanda said.

"Oh, thanks." I blushed and looked down. In the car ride, CariDee was the first to speak.

"This elimination's really gonna suck," she said. "I'll be honest. I didn't expect to actually like anyone in the competition, and I didn't expect us to grow together either. I'm gonna miss you guys." A sad realization washed over all of us, and it was apparent that most of us were avoiding one of the hardest separations: the twins. It would be inevitable, Michelle and Amanda would be split at some point. I knew that would be the hardest for me to watch.

After that, things were strained and awkward between us. The twins tried to make small talk and argued with one another, but I found it hard to make eye contact with anyone. I couldn't decide if going home now would be better than staying. Would I eventually lose Edward if I did stay? What if I won?

As we made our way to the judging panel, my mind was plagued with sudden 'what ifs', and before I knew it, Tyra's voice echoed off the walls.

"Welcome to judging, ladies."


	18. Chapter 18

**A very special thanks goes out to "team-edward4life1225". This chapter probably wouldn't exist without your incredibly encouraging review. **

**BPOV**

Elimination. Probably the most nerve wracking, yet oddly exciting, event occurring on Top Model. My heart pounded, then practically exploded, when I saw Tyra. It was like a gut wrenching reaction, because I was positive that I would be going home. There was no way they would put up with my missing the go-sees _and_ delivering a crappy photo.

We all stood on the platform in front of the judging table, marveling over how empty it felt. I was used to being completely crowded and smooshed, now the five of us spread out evenly in front of the judges, ready to be eaten alive.

"So, this week, our lovely ladies participated in a shoot with a live bull!" Tyra exclaimed. The judges feigned surprise, like they didn't know what we did. I found the theatrics to be slightly humorous. "Well, let's get started." And then, of course, I was called up first. Joy.

"Bella!" Tyra beamed at me. "How was your stay in the hospital?" Well, how was I supposed to answer this? _It sucked_. At least, that's what I wanted to say.

"Gosh, I am so glad that I was able to stay there for as long as I did and still be a part of this competition. I can't tell you how grateful I am to still be here, so thank you." I was afraid to look at Edward. I didn't trust my facial expression anymore—they would betray me eventually, and right now wasn't the best time.

"I'm glad to hear that. Now, before we view your photo, we have a couple questions to ask." My stomach felt like it was going to fly out of my butt. _They knew! _She paused to effect.

"In this competition, who do you think has the most potential," she asked. It took me a second to register what she said. Maybe they didn't know…then I scrambled to come up with a response.

"Uh…well, I would have to say the person with most potential is CariDee. I mean, I think I have potential" I lied, "but I feel like CariDee had a lot of fight in her and she's definitely fighting."

"Okay, and who do you think has the least potential?" That was easy for me, even though I felt horrible saying it.

"I feel like Eugenia has the least potential. Pretty much all I hear out of her is something negative, and I think that shows in her photos. In this competition, you can't thrive off of negativity, I don't feel like you'll reach your full potential that way." I could feel Eugenia's eye daggers stabbing me in the back. Oh well. Tyra seemed impressed by what I said. Then I looked over at Edward, who was sporting a raised eyebrow. I looked down, embarrassed.

"Well, let's look at your photo." We all turned out attention to a monitor on the wall that my picture was displayed on. For a moment, I was surprised. It didn't even look like me. Tyra embellished the photo with her words of praise, saying I looked stunning, but the other judges claimed that I looked too rehearsed. I was willing to accept that and walk back to the platform, but Edward spoke up before I left.

"I disagree with that. How can you possibly be rehearsed when you're in a coliseum with a live bull? Unless Bella has been a bull fighter in the past, I don't really think that's possible." My face, I'm sure, was bright red. Edward sticking up for me was extremely romantic, but I knew he was just doing it to make me feel better. So much for remaining unbiased. I tried desperately not to trip on my way back to the platform.

The others were called up and all asked the questions about modeling potential. Surprisingly, no one thought I had the least potential. No one thought I had the most either, so I felt like I was at least in the clear. All of the girls were judged and then we were herded into a waiting room, like usual.

**EPOV**

After the girls left, the others immediately set to attacking the photos. With an inaudible sigh, I pretended to be interested and threw my opinion in there every once in a while. It was amazing how much Bella had changed my life. I didn't see people as a "perfect photo-op" anymore. I saw them for their true qualities. Bella had revived a part of me that I didn't even know existed anymore. I saw the world for its beauty, not for its flaws When Bella's picture was being critiqued, I felt the sudden need to throw my thoughts out there, which was something I usually tried not to do when it came to her.

"She is probably one of the most photogenic and unique girls in this competition. She photographs wonderfully," I started.

"Yes," Twiggy replied. "I agree one hundred percent, but I'm having a difficult time placing her. She doesn't seem very…excited to be here. She's very talented, no doubt, but I can't quite tell if she wants this…"

"She's not going home," I butted in. Tyra turned to face me, looking surprised.

"Edward?" she asked. "Why are you suddenly so adamant about her leaving? Are you being protective?" I swallowed what I wanted to say and gave her the next best answer.

"I just think she has the most potential out of all of these girls. I think she's a real girl, not some fake actress, who genuinely wants to be here. Sending her home would be a mistake."

"Well, if that's what you think, then she won't be voted off," Tyra said, obviously shocked. "We weren't going to vote her off anyway…but thank you for your enlightenment."

**BPOV**

No more than twenty minutes later, a camera man motioned for us to go back to the judging panel. We faced a very solemn looking Tyra when we entered the room again. I locked my eyes on Edward, trying to prepare myself. If I was voted off, I couldn't show any emotion towards him—it would ruin his career and his integrity would be questioned. Tyra started in with her usual schpeal about how many photos she holds in her hands, who wins what and blah blah blah. I wasn't listening.

The photo that she pulled out was Eugenia's. While I was surprised, I tried to be happy for her. Did I think she deserved it? No…but I didn't think I deserved it either, so I guess it didn't really matter. And then, I heard my name called. I looked up, astounded, to see Tyra holding my photo. Letting out a breathe of relief, I stumbled forward and took the photo from her hands.

"Thank you," was all I think to say. As I stood off to the side, Edward made eye contact with me and winked. Thankfully, the cameras were focused on Tyra and the three girls in front of her. Then, CariDee was called, and to all of our horrors, the twins were in the final two. CariDee and I looked at eachother with the same expression on our faces. In seconds, it was all over. Michelle was going home, leaving the "stronger" twin to stay and compete.

"You'd better win this for me," Michelle joked with Amanda before she walked off set. The emotions in the room following that were overpowering. I felt the relief of not being voted off, the fear my relationship with Edward, the sadness of Michelle's leaving, and, above all, exhaustion. Which is why I passed out as soon as we got home.

The next morning, we received another cryptic Tyra mail with some riddle on it. I didn't even bother trying to guess what it would be about. I just dressed comfortably in jeans and white t-shirt, and then waited for the van to come pick us up. It became clear what our challenge for the week would be when we were introduced to Nacho Blancho, a famous flamenco dancer. I died a little on the inside when I watched him demonstrate. I was going to lose, without a doubt.

They taught us a series of steps to a traditional Spanish dance, and I butchered every single one of them. While I thought I would be the worst dancer, J. and Jay were more focused on Amanda. Apparently, she was awkward…I was just clumsy.

I practiced my dance steps obsessively when we got back home. It was no use. I knocked a lamp over when I tried to practice the whole routine in one go. Defeated, I went to bed early. The next morning, we arrived at a dance studio for our dancing tests. Amanda showed significant improvement, which I was happy to see. CariDee and Eugenia were great, of course. And then it was my turn. When I finished my routine, Nacho's face fell slightly, but he thanked me, nonetheless. Eugenia ended up being the challenge winner. I thought that was unfair, but I guess that's just life.

Then it came time for our photoshoot. This week, we were to be paired up with another model to pose as floating nymphs in water. It was a great idea, except for the fact that the water was absolutely freezing. To make things even better, my partner was Eugenia. I don't know which felt worse, the freezing cold pins and needles that I got from the water, or the holes Eugenia was burning into me with her glares.

To say that the shoot was difficult would be an extreme understatement. We had to float next to each other in the water, and I definitely struggled with not sinking. Dressed in very flowy dresses with smoky makeup on, I tried to make myself feel like a fairy, but it didn't really work. Apparently, the photographer liked what I was doing. He said my body looked angelic and very mystical in the water. I doubted it, but thanked him anyway.

When we got home, we all drank hot cocoa and bundled ourselves in blankets. It was nice to not feel tension in the house for a few minutes. We acted like we were friends. Since Michelle had gone home, Amanda hadn't quite been herself. She seemed so…depressed. I tried my best to comfort her. Maybe she was feeling the way I did without Alice around.

Mostly everyone fell asleep earlier than I did—it was around 8:30 when CariDee and Eugenia started snoring. Amanda was curled up in her bed and watching a movie, so I took the chance to go for a walk. I needed to clear my head and think for a little while. It was chilly outside, so I pulled on a sweater and some tennis shoes and grabbed my shoes. Spain was different at night. The city was still alive and busy, similar to L.A., but so different. This was a happy busy, more carefree. A young couple walked past me, holding hands. I felt a small pang in my chest, wishing I could do that with Edward.

I had no idea what it do about us. I loved him, there was no doubt about that. But I didn't want to the be the one to end everything that he had worked so hard for. His career, his name in the business, essentially his reputation. I didn't have much to go back home to, just Alice, and she was getting married. There wasn't much out there for me anyway.

Once I started shivering, I made my way back to the apartment. Amanda had fallen asleep with the TV still on, so I turned it off and crawled into bed myself. Tomorrow was elimination, again, so when the girls woke up, it was chaotic. Everyone was trying to dress themselves up, thinking that if they looked really nice, it would make up for a bad photo. I just threw my hair into a messy bun and dressed similarly to the way I did yesterday in jeans and a t-shirt.

It wasn't as tense now that Michelle was gone. I think it was because we weren't worried about which sister would be sent home anymore. Now it was a constant worry of which one of _us_ would be leaving. Tyra was just as fun and flirty when we walked into the room as she normally was. Eugenia and I were called up first to be judged. According to the judges, I outshone my partner. She, as usual, fell flat. In fact, Eugenia wasn't even floating in our shot. She had her foot on the ground. I felt pretty confident when we walked back to the platform.

After CariDee and Amanda were judged, it became pretty apparent who was going home. Either Amanda or Eugenia would be leaving. After they deliberated, Amanda was the last one standing. To my surprise, she wasn't really upset.

"I get to go home to my sister now," she said, after thanking everyone for the experience. This was probably the first heartfelt elimination on the show. It would probably be the only one as well.

With only the three of us left, the show had gone from a modeling competition to an all out bitch war, and I was caught in the middle.

**AN: Hi everyone! Long time no see, huh? Well, what did you all think? I know, there wasn't a lot of Edward in this chapter, but he'll be in the next one. We're almost at the end now. Who do you think is gonna win? Do you think anyone's going to find out about Bella and Edward? Let me know in a review (: Oh, and sorry for any typos…**


	19. Chapter 19

BPOV

"Today, you girls are going to doing a TV commercial and print ad for Covergirl Outlast Double Lip Shine!" That was how my morning started. J. was happy as ever, and he told us he would be directing our commercial. I knew the commercial and print ads were traditional top model occurrences, but the fact that I was shooting as _official_ commercial for Covergirl, _and_ the photo that would be featured in Seventeen Magazine if I won was mind boggling.

On our way over to hair and makeup, J. suddenly remembered something important. "Oh! I almost forgot," he said, dramatically, "We're going to have a special guest on set today. Girls, say hello to our very own Edward Masen!" He walked off set and started towards us. Time seemed to slow as I watched him get nearer and nearer to me. I thought of the young couple I saw holding hands last night.

"Hi, Edward," Eugenia and CariDee said. My reaction was a bit delayed, so I finished saying "Edward" after everyone else. He cracked a breath taking grin and greeted us all.

"Hi, ladies. Let's hope everything goes well on set today." Then we were ushered off to get our faces put on. I fought the urge to look behind me as we walked to the trailers to get ready. My heart hammered; I wasn't prepared for this, I didn't know if I would be able to keep it together if he was watching me. I would most likely fall apart.

While the stylists went to work on our hair and makeup, we were given a script to memorize. While I tried desperately to memorize my lines, Christian, the hair stylist, went to work on straightening my tangled mess of hair. He eventually got out a comb and tried to rip through my rats' nest. I didn't bother brushing my hair last night…or this morning when I woke up. Instead, I threw it up into a messy bun and decided to let the hair people deal with it. Now, I was dealing with the repercussions of my actions.

Because Covergirl is all about natural beauty and free spirits, the stylists went light on my makeup, only using enough to accentuate my features and only really applying the lip product that we were selling in the commercial. I was slotted to go last, which was more of a curse than a blessing for me. I was already a basket case of nerves—the waiting games just made things worse. As I waited for CariDee and Eugenia to finish their commercials, I ran my lines through my head.

_Slip on that color and slick on that shine, and you'll be shining a very long time. New, Covergirl Outlast Double Lip Shine…_

Before I could force myself to memorize the rest, J. was calling my name. "Bella, your turn!" I passed Eugenia on the way to cameras. She sent me eye daggers again. Shooting the commercial was pretty straight forward: look at the camera, say your lines, J. tells you if it sucked or not. The only problem was that my nerves were literally incapacitating me. All I could think about was Edward sitting in the chair next to J. And Edward's lips, and Edward's body…his laugh, and his smile…my thoughts were pure Edward. They had nothing to do with lipstick. My words weren't coming out right at all.

"Stick on your color, and spack in that shiny and you'll be lasting a very long…" I gave up after that try. J. didn't look very happy.

"Bella, you look way too nervous. It's showing up on camera. Take a few deep breaths, relax." I tried doing so, breathing deeply and trying to forget about the god sitting in front of me. When I opened my eyes and stepped in front of the camera again, J. gave me one more tip. "Don't try and talk to the camera, pretend that you're actually talking to someone. Your conversation will seen much more natural."

So, I took his advice, and instead of pretending that Edward wasn't there, I read my lines to him and pretended like I was having a genuine conversation with him. My lines came out perfectly.

"That was fantastic, Bella!" J. said when I had finished. "Take five and then go finish up with your photo shoot." I thanked him and walked over to a secluded area on set with no one around. I needed to get my head in the game.

"Bella?" A familiar voice called quietly. I grin stretched across my face involuntarily.

"I'm over here," I replied. Edward found me and swept me into a hug. "You were fantastic," he breathed. "Really, you did a very good job."

"I pretended I was talking to you," I admitted with a blush. He chuckled and kissed my forehead.

"If God only knew how much I love you," he murmured. I blushed again.

"I love you,too," I said, stretching on my toes to kiss him. He deepened the kiss by bringing my body closer to his, wrapping his arm around my waist. I stifled a moan and quickly pulled away from him.

"You're going to ruin my makeup," I hissed. He laughed, and couldn't help but join in. I winked at Edward and then hurried off to find the photographer. He was pretty easy to work with, but even he noticed my nerves.

"Is everything okay? Are you feeling alright?" he asked. My cheeks must have been flushed.

"I'm perfect," I said, striking another pose. He shrugged and snapped a few more photos.

"You're doing a fantastic job of finding the light," he said. "Try and relax your face a little more." After a few more frames, my shoot was over and I was able to rest for a few minutes. Then J. rounded all of us up again. We had to shoot a group commercial…and pretend that we like each other. I could stand CariDee just fine, but the other one, _it_, was really pushing my buttons today. Our group commercial was a small snippet of us giggling and collapsing on a couch together. It was lovely.

"Oh, honey, you look exhausted," Sultan, the head makeup artist pointed out. He handed me a cold water bottle and then began adding more finishing powder to my skin. The competition suddenly worked much differently—one of us would be eliminated in less than an hour. The judges were going to interview our photos not too long from now.

Still in the clothes we wore during the photo shoot, we walked into the judging panel. The tension was palpable. You could feel the anxiety and the competition in the air. Tyra and the others, including Edward, were looking magnificent as ever behind their long mahogany table. There was also two guest judges, Victorio and Lucchino, the designers of the clothes we would be wearing in the final fashion show. At panel, they no longer simply judged your photos. At this point, I was sure they were going to analyze our personalities and dig in to us as much as possible. That was exactly what they did. And I was called out first.

"Hi there, Bella," Tyra greeted me.

"Hello," I said happily, even though my insides were burning with nerves and anxiety.

"Well, today you shot a commercial for Covergirl, and this was your best take," she said, motioning to a monitor that was mounted to the wall. When my commercial came on, I was rather surprised. I pretended to be watching the screen, even though I wasn't. I just listened to my voice to see if sounded as nervous as I felt. When it was over, I waited for them to attack me.

"Wow!" Tyra said excitedly. "You sounded so natural! You did a very nice job of looking very Covergirl-esque and still selling the product." Twiggy nodded her head in agreement.

"Bravo," she said. "That was fantastic. But J. pointed out a ways back that you were extremely nervous when you stepped on set. I want to congratulate you on not letting that show, because you looked like you were totally comfortable in front of that camera."

"You also shot a photo for Seventeen Magazine," Tyra said, and my photo popped up on the screen.

"You definitely look like a Covergirl," Tyra said. "It's beautiful, and your skin looks amazing." Then Edward threw in a comment.

"I love the way you pushed out your bottom lip just slightly. It really sold the lip gloss."

I stuttered out a thank you and walked back to the other girls feeling slightly confident. They didn't chew me up and spit me out! But my confidence slowly dwindled away as the others were evaluated. Everyone received positive comments, not a single criticism. Even Eugenia was praised because she looked fun and lively on camera. They showed our group commercial, which made me want to vomit, and it seemed like they thought we did a good job. I had to keep myself from slumping out of the room when Tyra asked us to leave so they could deliberate.

The wait seemed to drone on forever, taking much longer than it did when was 12 of us competing. CariDee and I sat together on a couch in the waiting room and made small talk. Eugenia was off somewhere else, she'd received a phone call.

"Pretty nerve wracking, huh?" She asked, running her fingers through her long blond hair. I nodded.

"Yeah, it's pretty bad," I agreed. Without warning, her body slumped onto me and she started crying softly.

"I'm sorry," she choked out. "The nerves do this to me sometimes." I tried my best to comfort her, rubbing her back gently.

"It's okay," I murmured. "We'll make it."

A few moments later, CariDee calmed down and we were called back into the judging room. Eugenia showed up just in time, slightly out of breath.

As expected, Tyra only held two photos in her hands instead of three when we saw her next. She looked solemn, but her face perked up when she called CariDee's name first. CariDee let out a gasp of relief and walked forward to take her photo, tears still brimming in her eyes.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you," she said in one breath. Tyra laughed softly turned back to us.

"In front of me stand two very beautiful and strong, but different women. In one of them, we see so much talent just waiting under the surface, dying to come out. And in the other, we see a true model, almost a natural, who seems to be taking more care of others than she is herself. Both of these girls are extremely special and gifted. So which one did we choose?" And then she pulled out my photo.

My knees almost gave in. I tripped my way forward to grab my photo and pulled Tyra into a hug. "Thank you," I whispered in ear, also looking at Edward behind her. He smiled at me and then shifted his gaze over to Eugenia, who had tears in her eyes.

Tyra walked forward after I took my place next to CariDee and gave her the usual maternal speech about how great she's going to be. She walked over to say goodbye to us, and I couldn't help but feel sorry for her. I gave her a sincere hug and then she left. As soon as she left the room, CariDee and I let out a sigh of relief and squealed with each other.

I didn't know whether or not CariDee liked Eugenia until now. Apparently, she felt similarly to the way I did. But now we both had to face the fact that we couldn't really be friends anymore, as we were each other's competition. I had no plans to stab her in the back or to do anything that could jeopardize her chances of winning. In fact, I didn't have a plan at all. I knew I promised Alice I would win this, and I knew doing so would open _so_ many doors for me. I just didn't know how I was going to do it. I refused to win by casting my morals and integrity aside, as I had seen other girls do in previous seasons.

"Ladies," Tyra said, "it's now time to prepare ourselves for the final runway show."

**AN: So, did you like it? Also, I know in the actual season, CariDee and Eugenia were kind of a team in the final episodes, but that's because Melrose was a giant meanie and they didn't want her to win. Bella's definitely not like that, so I decided to turn the tables a bit. Let me know what you thought of it (: Please ignore any typos…**


	20. Chapter 20

BPOV

"Bella, I want you to meet Dr. Michelle," Tyra said, acknowledging a woman sitting next to her. She looked very…poised. The three of us were sitting in a smaller room. I was being interviewed. Again.

Dr. Michelle was very friendly, but I knew she wasn't here to become acquainted with me. They were questioning me more for the purpose of an evaluation. To decide whether I was Top Model material or not.

"Bella," Michelle asked, "how do you think you've grown from this competition?"

Of all the questions, that's the one she decides to pop. I didn't know how to answer it.

"I learned to trust myself," I said. "That's what's helped me grow so much. It's what's made me feel like I can actually do something." Dr. Michelle was analyzing every word that came out of my mouth.

"How do you think you'd handle the stress of being in this type of industry?" she asked, crossing her legs and folding her hands over them.

"Stress is just something I've learned to deal with over the years. I know when it's time for me to take a step back and breathe for a few seconds before I completely lose my head."

Tyra suddenly butted in. "That's really good to hear, Bella. I know you don't take control of situations, you're the 'go with the flow' type. Modeling can be very demanding, so it's good to know that you recognize your limits."

Dr. Michelle still wasn't done questioning me. "How do you think your past has defined you as a person?" I was a little more than confused. This question had _nothing_ to do with modeling. I knew my answer would have to do with Renee, I just hoped it wouldn't be shown on TV.

"Um…growing up, I took care of my mother a lot. The same went for my dad, but that was more of a companionship. I guess I've always been forced to be the adult in my life. It just comes naturally to me. It's a good thing too; I never went out a partied, I never did drugs, I focused on school and maintaining my family."

The conversation ended shortly after that. Thank god. I met CariDee in the lobby where we waited for the van to pick us up. We talked about absolutely nothing, but it seemed to suit us both. The driver stopped the car in front of what appeared to be a series of caves and caverns. We both looked at each other, confused, but got out anyway and followed the pathway.

"I know we're doing a fashion show," CariDee said, "but what the hell is this?" I laughed as we walked along the path. Finally, we saw J. in front of us, waiting patiently.

"Hi ladies," he said happily.

"Hey," I greeted.

"Well, this is it. The final show. Are we ready?" CariDee sure was. I was nervous. We followed him back to the hair and makeup station where a TON of other models were already getting ready. While the artists went to work with our faces and hair, a show coordinator instructed us on the layout. I wasn't really paying attention—my heart was fluttering uncontrollably.

"I wonder what our dresses look like," CariDee said, excitedly. I was finished with hair and makeup, looking like a dead bride with an expensive, voluminous hairdo. I thought I looked a little bit like an Americanized geisha, with chalk white face powder on and a plunging blush color that created such a stark contrast between the two colors that it actually looked decent. My eyelashes were caked with so much mascara that it was difficult to blink. _Well, the show must go on,_ I thought to myself.

When the show coordinators had their backs turned, CariDee grabbed my hand and pulled us over to the clothing racks where the dresses were hanging. There were three dress bags for each of us. She unzipped one of the bags with her name in it and revealed a breathtaking white gown, with gossamer accents along the bust line and sleeves.

"Close it back up! We'll get it trouble," I hissed. She rolled her eyes.

"Bella, we're wearing these down a runway. What are they gonna do? Yell at us? And for what? Contaminating the dresses?" We both giggled, but she zipped the bag up. CariDee suddenly got this odd look on her face.

"Bella, can I ask you something?"

I nodded. "Of course you can."

"Do you think we'll still be friends after this?" I felt a small pang of sadness in my chest.

"I think so," I said, honestly. "At least, I hope we will be." She reached over and pulled me into a hug.

"No matter what happens, I'm really glad I met you. You helped me find myself. I think I'd be lost without you here." I smiled at her, at a loss for words, and J. came around the corner with Tyra.

"Hey girls!" Tyra shouted, dressed in a fantastic Spanish ball gown. Her hair was pulled to the side in a bun and was sporting dark makeup that made her features pop dramatically. "Are we ready to get this show on the road?"

"Hell yes we are!" CariDee shouted. Tyra high fived her enthusiastically. I made an awkward noise to try and show enthusiasm. Tyra laughed and hugged me.

"Ladies!" An angry coordinator yelled at us. "GET DRESSED!" Several assistants flocked over to us. My clothes were basically ripped off my body and a dress was carefully pulled off my head. I didn't even have time to be embarrassed about being practically naked in front of strangers. Someone threw a pair of stilettos at me. Then J. was pushing toward the entrance to the runway, shouting above the loud music that was now blaring.

"Go kick some ass, Bells!"

I charged down that runway. I didn't expect it to be so long, but I stomped my way down it, locking my eyes on some distant object and trying to look fierce. Trying. As I neared the end of the runway, and the audience cheered and clapped, I spotted the judges. They were sitting in a small row of chairs off to the side. I focused my gaze on Edward until I got the end and turned around to make my way back. When I got back to the dressing room, I was ushered into another dress and my hair was makeup was touched up. Then I was shoved back out again.

This was walk was supposed to be different. I was supposed to have a "mini face-off" with CariDee at the end of the runway. I flew down, each step bringing me closer to Edward, like a gravitational pull. I posed at the end, contorting my body into an acceptable shape and turned just as CariDee was nearing my place. Like we were instructed to do, we both stopped next to each other and glared, trying to out pose the other. Tyra, apparently, loved this, and shouted at us like an insane woman.

"Bella, you're doing amazingly," J. encouraged. "This is the last piece, did they tell you what to do?" he asked. Yes, they had. I was to run down that runway, screaming and playing the part of a lost, frightened bride. Fun.

"Yeah, I know what to do," I said, feeling the beat of the runway music in my chest. I flashed him a smiled and slapped the small of my back.

"Get out there!" And then I was screaming my lungs out, pretending I was lost in the woods. Really, I was thinking about Edward the entire time, letting out all of my pent up emotions. I tried to recreate the scene from 'Beauty and the Beast', where Belle is lost in the woods. It seemed like a great idea, and considering the runway was set up in a series of caves that were only lit by candlelight, I had no problem pretending like I was lost. As I ran down the runway, I felt my fake screams turn into real ones. My fears were pouring out of me.

I walked back to the dressing room and waited for all of the other models to finish their walk. CariDee and I were ending the entire show. When all of the models returned, they went back once more for the final walk. CariDee and I hung back and then stalked out, pretending like we hated each other. We both tried to outshine each other at end; I posed like my life depended on it. Then all of the lights went out in the auditorium, and as we were instructed to do, CariDee and I ran off stage as quickly as we could. When the lights turned back on, we were gone. The only thing left on the stage was a puff of smoke. Quite dramatic.

We collapsed in a head in the dressing room, laughing together and out of breath.

"Ugh, I need to take all of the makeup off, like now. We have judging in an house," CariDee huffed. I agreed and went off to find a corner that I could use to undress. I walked over to the quieter portion backstage and caught sight of Edward. Without thinking, I ran over and threw my arms around him.

"You were amazing," he whispered in my ear. I quickly dropped my arms from around him, thinking we could have been seen, and thanked him politely. He leaned down to whisper in my ear once more. "If anyone asks, I was just curious to see what was going on back here. I love you." Then he hurried out the door he came in and it was like he was never there. I sighed and began undressing. I realized my makeup was hopeless and went to find a makeup artist. I found a quiet girl at a makeup station.

"Can you help me get this off?" I asked. She agreed and practically attacked my face with makeup remover and cotton balls. It was nice to be able to look in the mirror and recognize myself. Not long after that, CariDee and I were summoned to the judging panel. We both looked at each other nervously.

If CariDee won, I wouldn't hold it against her. In fact, I would be happy for her. If I won, I didn't know how I would feel. I wanted this, I knew that was true. I just didn't know who wanted it more. We tried to distract ourselves by chatting about the gowns we were wearing on the way there. It didn't really work.

When we stepped into the room, facing the table with the people who held our futures in their hands, I felt the most horrible knot of confliction in my gut. I looked at Edward and I looked at Tyra, then I glanced at CariDee. It was like everything was happening in slow motion. I barely heard Tyra talking to us. All I could do was keep myself from staring at the floor.

Then I heard Tyra call my name. 

"Bella, let's review your runway performance, shall we?" she asked. I stepped forward and the flat screen on the wall illuminated with a still shot of me walking.

"Dayum," Miss J. said. "Just…dayum." I blushed.

"Girl, you looked _so_ fierce out on the runway. And during the final scene, you really had us going there. Or, at least, you had _me_ going there. You looked like a dead bride trying to find her husband or some crazy stuff like that. It was believable, and you looked great while doing it." Tyra, if felt, was gushing about me. I didn't like it. And Edward didn't say anything. I was glad.

CariDee also got wonderful reviews. They thought she had a better walk than I did. There's no surprise. What did surprise me, however, was how quickly the judges made their decision. We were only waiting in the lobby for ten minutes before we were called back in.

Nervously, we both stood from the couch we were sitting on, held each other's hand and walked through the doors. This was it.

**AN: Hi everyone! Okay, first of all, I know that in the actual episode, Miss. J. opened the screaming part of the fashion show with an incredible performance, but I didn't think putting that scene in would make the emotions into what they are. Second of all, I have a proposal. **

**I would like, almost more than anything, for this story to get over 1,000 reviews by the end. Here's the thing, I'm not sure how much longer I'm making this story. It all depends on the number of reviews it gets. If we don't reach over 1,000, the story gets a crappy ending, which I'm fully prepared to do. No, I'm just kidding. But really, I would love it if we could get that many reviews, it would be great (: **

**Thanks! REVIEW!**


	21. Chapter 21

**AN: Please read the author's note at the end, it explains a few things. Muchas gracias (:**

BPOV

I was surprised to find a new judge sitting at the table when CariDee and I walked in.

"Before we begin, I thought it would be important to bring in the one person who knows you all better than we do as your judges, Mr. J. Manuel."

He smiled at us happily and waved. "Hi, ladies," he said, flashing his brilliant teeth. My stomach dropped. Why were they making this so hard? Couldn't they just tell us who won and go home? CariDee laced her fingers through mine and we walked forward to our places on the podium. I swear my heart beat was audible, like the baseline to a dramatic techno song.

"Now, I know you're all thinking we've already decided who our winner is, but this cycle is much more difficult than the others have been. So we brought in another judge and we'll review your work with you now instead of having you both wait in the lobby for another twenty minutes. That's just rude." Tyra explained, getting animated with her hand gestures. She'd changed out of her eccentric ball gown and was wearing a pale yellow halter dress with green accents around her neck. She always had this air of effortless beauty about her that made me go weak in the knees…why couldn't I be like that?

J. Stood up from the table and walked toward us, sporting a pink blazer and dark wash jeans that were tailed to fit his body perfectly.

"I mean this whole heartedly when I say that I love you both dearly," he started. "But there can only be one winner."

Tyra got up and joined him in front of us. "J., which one do you think wants it more?" Her question was blunt, yet so simple. Who wanted this more?

"Well, something that you may not see from the girls so much is that they both have some serious self confidence issues."

"How so?" Tyra asked, clearly interested. He walked forward and grabbed CariDee's hands.

"Miss CariDee here hides her self-image issues through her loud, and sometimes obnoxious, personality. Almost as if she feels like people will see who she really is when she's not talking, or singing or dancing. Just being CariDee." He was explaining this to the judges, but then he spoke directly to her.

"You know you're talented, but you seem to cave into yourself whenever you let us see who are, even for a brief moment. You have to learn to let your past go, so the beautiful you inside can shine through." I felt tears pooling in my eyes.

"I know that. I just want this so bad, and I'm afraid that just being myself won't be enough. I've struggled my whole life just trying to prove to people that I can actually do something, and this is it for me. I want to show everyone that I can do this." She sniffed loudly and quickly brushed away her tears. J. rested his hands on her shoulders.

"The real you is just perfect. I promise you, with any photo shoot that you go to, with any modeling contract you sign, with _anything_ you do in life, the only thing that's going to make you successful is that wonderful person inside of you. You can't be afraid to show it."

Then he turned to me and held my hands in his. His skin was unbelievably soft. He must have moisturized obsessively.

"Bella," he started. "I see you struggling with your self confidence issues as well, but yours are different than CariDee's. You show us who you are every time you step in front of that camera. It's like a window into your soul, but away from the camera, you're afraid to let people in. I've noticed that you always put everyone else in this competition before yourself, like you were more concerned with making sure they were okay. Then you could tend to yourself, just as long as no one was watching. It was very…maternal." I swallowed hard. What was this guy? A shrink? Last I'd heard, he was a makeup artist and coordinator for photo shoots and any really modeling related.

"There's no doubt that you're very talented, and I can see that you want this, but I can't figure out if you want this more for yourself or if you want to see CariDee happy."

"I'm afraid I won't be good enough," I said. "Like everything I've learned here will just go away when it's over." J. sighed and dropped my hands.

"Bella, you came into this competition talented, carrying everything we asked of all of those others girls: intelligence, knowledge of this industry, and passion. All we taught you how to do was capture yourself and let other people see it."

He stepped away from us. Tyra was standing very still, holding her hands in front of her casually. They both walked back to their seats, completely silent. Then, I kid you not, she took out a yellow legal pad of paper and began scribbling furiously on it. When she was done, she passed the note to Twiggy, who wrote her own notes down, then she passed it on.

"Are they really passing notes?" CariDee whispered in my ear.

"Looks like it," I whispered back. It was comical.

The note passing lasted for another five minutes, and then, Tyra came forward again, holding that one photo in her hand that had haunted mine, and most likely CariDee's, nightmares for the past week and a half.

"We've reached a decision," she said solemnly. CariDee gripped my hand tightly, cutting off my circulation. "The judges and I see so much potential in the both of you, and this decision was _not_ easy. But we have decided that one you has just a little bit more…oomph…than the other."

She slowly flipped over the photo in her hands, and then I heard it. "Bella."

CariDee sighed, giving my hand one last squeeze, and I nearly gasped. It didn't feel right at all as I walked forward to grab my photo. I stopped halfway down the walkway.

"Wait," I said quietly, knowing how furious Edward would be with what I was about to do. "I…can't take this." Tyra tilted her head, staring at me questioningly.

"CariDee deserves this more than I do. I have a life that I can go back home to, and I know I'll be able to start over. But she _needs_ this, modeling is who she is. Modeling is just something I'm good at. But..she has grown so much during this competition and she's fought so hard. I don't feel right taking this."

Tyra's mouth dropped. Out of the corner of my eye, I was Edward stand up from his seat.

"Bella…" he said warningly. "What are you doing?" He walked around the table, and I shook my head lightly at him, silently begging him to go back to his seat and act indifferent again.

"No," I whispered. He continued walking forward, and Tyra still had the "lost guppy" look on her face.

"You won." He said shortly. "Do not give this up." Anger coursed through my veins.

"I will not take this. I would be giving up too much and ruining everything for you. I refuse." Finally, Tyra snapped out of her stupor.

"What the hell is she talking about , Edward? Bella?" she asked, placing a hand on her hip. CariDee was making confused noises behind me and J. looked completely flabbergasted. Jay was fanning his face with the legal pad they took notes on.

"You aren't ruining _anything_ for me, Bella. Can't you see that? You're my everything, and can't believe you're just going to give something like this up. This is your future, right in front of you," he said, pleading with his eyes.

"No." I said firmly. "You are my future. America's Next Top Model is CariDee's future."

"Hold up!" Tyra finally shouted. We stopped arguing and looked at her.

"Edward…is there something going on that I need to know about?" she asked. He locked eyes with me and nodded his head.

"Tyra…he said slowly. "I know I broke the rules, but I'm so in love with Bella Swan. Irrevocably in love with her."

"What?" she gasped. She turned to me, looking appalled.

"I'm…sorry?"I offered. She threw her hands in the air.

"Damn it, Edward! Why didn't you tell me? And how did I miss that?"

"Maybe it's because he was so quiet during judging?" Twiggy butted in. "I mean, he hardly ever said anything about her, now that I think about it."

Tyra huffed, clearly annoyed. "Turn the camera's off," she called to the camera men. "We have so much crap to edit out now," she mused. "So, Bella, you're going to give this opportunity up for him?" she asked. I felt like she was turning this into her talk show.

"Well..yeah," I said simply. "Do you know how bad that would look for the show? If I won and then people see us together as a couple? They'd automatically think that he cheated for me and judged biased. And he'd never be able to continue with his photography, because no one would hire him," now I was pouring my guts out and making an ass out myself.

"Oh, would you shut up," Edward sighed. "You worry way too much. It wouldn't be like that, and it wouldn't matter anyway."

"That's not all, Edward," I said, before he could tell me to shut up again. "Falling in love with you made me realize that this isn't a life that I want. I only want a life with you, and I'd much rather see a model who loves what she's doing on the cover of Seventeen Magazine." I reached behind me and pulled CariDee forward.

"Did you know about this?" Tyra asked her.

"No," she said quickly. "I had no idea."

"Well, I guess that makes five of us," she mumbled. Edward finally stepped towards me and pulled me into his arms. It was the first time I could _really_ hug him.

"Tyra," Edward said over my head. "I'm not giving her up." He pushed away from me slightly and looked at me, his eyes smoldering. My stomach tingled, and when he pulled me into a deep kiss, _in front of everybody_, it was the first time I could _really_ kiss him. I completely forgot about everyone around us. For a moment, it was just the two of us in the entire universe as electric currents ran through our bodies. When someone cleared their throat behind us, we broke apart. I blushed furiously.

"Drama drama drama," Jay sighed.

"Well…what do we do now?" J. asked. Tyra suddenly got a bright smile on her face.

"So, CariDee, you're America's Next Top Model!" she said. "How does it feel!" We all laughed and CariDee pulled me into a hug.

"Thank you," she whispered. "Thank you so much."

"You deserve it," I said back to her. Suddenly Tyra sighed again.

"Damn," she muttered. "We have to refilm that entire scene. Girls, put your scared faces back on so we can redo this thing. Turn the cameras back on!"

We reacted the scene, CariDee gripping my hand and Tyra standing in front of us again with that solitary photo. She flipped it to reveal CariDee's gorgeous photo, CariDee flipped out, and Tyra gave me the rehearsed speech about how far I'm going to go, even though I didn't win. Everything was perfect.

Once the cameras were shut off again, I sprang forward and ran into Edward's arms, loving him with my entire being.

"Now," he whispered in my ear. "We live happily ever after."

**AN: So, who was expecting that? Also, just so you know, THIS IS NOT THE END! There's going to be a couple more chapters. So, for those of you who didn't like the way it ended, I'm very sorry, and I grant you full permission to hate me. Must I justify why things happened the way they did? Well…fine. **

**I'm a huge ANTM fan, and I love CariDee, because I felt like she was one of the few models who didn't turn into a complete psycho bitch. Also, can anyone really see Bella as a full time model? I sure can't. And doing that would ruin my plans for the very end of this story, which you will all find out about very soon. **

**So, feel free to hate…just don't hate with a passion, cuz then I can really feel it. Just know that this is the way it had to be. **

**Also! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE REVIEWS! You all ROCK MY FREAKIN SOCKS OFF!  
**

**Much love (:**


	22. Chapter 22

BPOV

"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Los Angeles National Airport. The local time is 5:45 pm and the local temperature is sixty two degrees Fahrenheit. On the behalf of United Airlines, I'd like to thank you for blah blah blah," the catty flight attendant droned on. I was still groggy from the flight home. My head was planted on Edward's shoulder.

I looked up at him sandwiched next to the window.

"Hi, beautiful," he said. I smiled at him.

"Hi," I mumbled. He kissed my temple and brushed back my hair gently with his hand. I sighed and kissed him on the cheek. Tyra had already smacked the back of Edward's head once when we got a little too carried away, so we'd been keeping the contact to a minimum. CariDee was camped in the row behind us with her, listening to her iPod and occasionally giggling simply from excitement.

"Do you think I'm ready to face Alice?" I asked, almost dreading her reaction when she saw me. Calling her after the final judging wasn't very fun.

"_Alice?" I asked into the receiver. _

"_Did you win!" she squealed. "Tell me you did. You did, didn't you?" _

"_Um…sort of," I said, hesitantly. _

"_What do you mean 'sort of'? Either you win or you lose, Bella." _

"_Well, I did win," I said slowly. She screamed like a banshee on the other end. "But," I said loudly. The screaming stopped abruptly. _

"_But what?" _

"_I resigned." The screaming started again, but instead of it being filled with joy and happiness, it was filled with anger and rage. I held the phone away from my ear with wide eyes. Edward laughed shortly and pulled the phone out of my hand, snapping it shut. _

"_She'll survive, I promise," he said, taking me into his arms. _

She called several times after that. I answered and was able to talk to her long enough to give her the flight information before she got angry again.

"Relax, Bella. She's tiny. You can take her on," he joked. Edward and I spent a large chunk of the flight talking about our plans for the future.

"_So, what do we do now?" I asked, tucked neatly under his arm. It was like I fit perfectly there. "I mean, you live in New York…" _

"_Yes, I do. And you live in Phoenix," he said, scratching his head. He thought for a few moments, but a thought was nagging in the back of my mind. When he looked over at me, the thought flew out of my mouth, like word vomit. _

"_What if I moved to New York?" My hand instantly flew over my mouth. I thought I'd blown it based off the confused look on his face. I was moving too fast. Then a breathtaking grin broke over his features. _

"_You'd do that?" he asked. _

"_Well, if it means being with you, then yes. And Alice gave me a choice, we either move to New York or to L.A. and I like New York better." _

"_That's funny…" Edward mused. "I was just going to suggest that I moved closer to you, but I like the idea of New York with you better, too." _

"_I'll find a place to stay there and I'm sure getting a job won't be that difficult," I thought out loud. _

"_Um…" Edward said, "This might sound odd, but I actually have an extra apartment." _

"_Huh?" I asked, clearly confused. "Why do you need an extra apartment?" _

"_I bought it a year ago as a makeshift photo studio. Any other spaces I had looked at just didn't do it for me. Really, it's hardly been used," he said. _

"_Oh, Edward, I couldn't…" I said, blushing. "I'll find a place on my own. I don't want to take that from you." _

"_Please, Bella, I want you to take it. It's yours. And Alice's too, if she wants to live there." _

"_Alice is engaged," I said. "She's probably going to want to live with Jasper." _

"_Well, it's big enough for three," he said._

"_Are you sure you're okay with that?" _

"_Bella, you gave up America's Next Top Model for me, I'll give up my rarely used photo studio for you." _

With wonderful news like that tucked under my sleeve, I knew Alice couldn't hate me for more than a few seconds. The rows in front of us were clearing out and people were pulling their belongings out of the overhead carriage compartments. We waited until Tyra stood up, impatient.

"What are we waiting for?" she snapped. According to Edward, she didn't like flying. I walked into the terminal nervously, holding Edward's hand. As we walked forward, I felt my goodbye with Edward looming over me.

"I don't want to say goodbye," I whispered when we were in the terminal. He looked at me, his eyes smoldering.

"You don't have to," he said back, bending down to kiss me. I felt the budding passion behind it nearly explode. I still wasn't used to _real_ Edward kisses.

"For the love of God," Tyra hissed. "Would you two stay off of each other for five minutes!" I pulled back, suddenly embarrassed. Edward told me she was just upset because we were together secretly and she didn't notice.

CariDee was one of the last ones out, still struggling with her iPod headphone. When she finally got them untangled, she ran over to me and threw her arms around me.

"Promise me we'll stay in touch," she said.

"Of course," I promised.

"You really are one of my best friends, you know," she said.

"You are, too," I said genuinely. "Go kick some ass being a famous model."

Edward and I said goodbye to everyone else. Tyra pulled me into a motherly hug.

"Child, you are coming on my talk show. We'll discuss this," she said gesturing toward me and Edward with her finger, " later. Until then, behave yourself." Everyone else left, leaving me and Edward to ourselves.

Our impending separation was looming over me. I had a layover, then another flight to catch to Phoenix in less than an hour. He wasn't going home until tomorrow morning. He sat with me on one of those uncomfortable airport benches, just holding me, until my flight was announced.

"I'm not saying goodbye," I insisted. "I'm just saying that it will feel like my arms have been ripped off until I see you again," I said, teary eyed.

He rolled his eyes. "We'll have you on the soonest flight to New York, I promise," he said, kissing every inch of exposed skin on my face and neck. I threw my arms around him, holding him to my chest tightly until the agent announced the last call for boarding. Before I knew it, I was in the air again, feeling a gaping hole in my chest.

I slept for the short flight, not wanting to think too much, knowing I might cry if I did, knowing I'd be fretting about my reunion with Alice. When the plane landed, I made sure to be one of the last ones off. As I walked into the terminal, I spotted my favorite pixy. Even from a distance, I could tell she was bouncing with excitement.

"Bella!" she squealed, sprinting towards me. She literally jumped on me, wrapping her arms around my neck and holding herself off the ground.

"Hi Alice," I laughed, hugging her back.

"Oh, I missed you _so_ much," she said in my air. "But…I AM SO FRICKEN PISSED!" she said, now standing on the ground. "What the hell is wrong with you! How could you just throw that away? We had plans, Bella, PLANS!"

"Alice, would you please just listen to me," I finally said. She continued ranting.

"We were going to live in a penthouse together! We were going to be surrounded by fashion and live prissy bitch lives!"

"Alice! Shut up!" I shouted, taking her by the shoulders. "Really, you're jumping to conclusions here."

She snapped her mouth shut, pouting. "How about we go get some coffee?" I asked. "I've been on a plane all day." She obliged, pouting the entire way to Starbucks. After she took her first sip of coffee, she perked up again.

"Now. Explain." She said, the devilish look now returned to her eyes.

"So, yes, I was chosen as the winner," I started. "But I chose something else instead."

She coughed and glared at me. "Well, this better be good."

"I chose to be with Edward, instead."

Her face immediately transformed from angry Alice, to hopeless romantic Alice. "Ohhh, Bella," she sighed. "Why didn't you just tell me?"

"I tried."

"I guess I should have seen this one, I mean, he's _so_ into you. You should have seen him when you were in the hospital in Spain." Though she looked considerably happier, her shoulders still slumped. "Guess we aren't moving to L.A….or New York."

"Actually, there's more," I said, sipping my cappuccino. Her eyebrows rose.

"More? Please tell me you aren't pregnant."

"No…jeez Alice," I huffed. "Edward lives in New York." She squealed a little.

"Really!" Then she paused. "Are you…moving in…with him?" she asked slowly. "I mean, yeah, I'm engaged to Jasper, but I was just going to have him move in with us until we got married…"

"You really have to stop interrupting me," I said, eyeing her down. She chewed on her lip. "I'm not moving in with Edward. But he did offer us a place to live, if we want it."

She jumped up from the table, doing the signature 'Alice Happy Dance', chanting "New York! New York! New York!"

I ducked my head, pretending to suddenly be interested in a packet of sugar until she was done completely embarrassing the both of us.

"So…wait, he offered us a place to live? I mean, we're so going, but what exactly did he offer?" she asked.

"He, um, actually has an extra apartment that he used as a photo studio. He said it's big enough for me, you and Jasper. If he even wants to live there." She squealed some more and clapped her hands happily.

"We have to go home and pack…oh…I was supposed to bring you home quickly…Jasper missed you too, he wanted to take us out to dinner…"

I sighed and looked down at my phone. It was almost 8:00. "Well, we still have time. Go call him, I need to do something real quick," I said, getting up to find a quiet spot in the room. I dialed Edward's number.

He answered on the first ring.

"Bella?"

"Hi," I breathed. "I landed a little while ago. Sorry, I was attacked by Alice."

"That's fine," he said, sounding relieved. "I was going crazy over here. I didn't know if you were safely on the ground or not."

We talked for a few more minutes until I saw Alice waving at me impatiently. "I have to go," I said, sadly.

"I'll call you in the morning before I take off," he promised. "I love you."

"I love you, too," I said. Then I hurried over to Alice and we left to go meet Jasper.

He didn't really like the idea of packing everything to move, and we knew it was going to be expensive shipping everything across the country, but Alice was firm when she said they were coming with me. The only thing that could have made me happier was having Edward with me at the moment.

_-Three weeks later—_

"Bella!" Alice shouted from her bedroom. "Where did we put the boxes of my shoes?"

"I think they're in my room, go check," I shouted back. I was in the kitchen, unpacking the dishes and silverware. Jasper was outside with Edward, still dealing with the sloppy delivery men, trying to figure out how to load our major furniture pieces into the elevator.

When we arrived yesterday, none of us had any idea of what to expect. Edward met us at the airport, and I was running into the terminal faster than a bullet. I nearly knocked him over as I threw myself at him. Alice and Jasper weren't far from behind me.

Alice surprised me by hugging him. "I knew you'd be something special," she joked. Jasper stepped forward and shook his hand. Right off the bat, I could tell they were going to be friends. It was something in Edward's smile that gave it away.

"So, where do we live now?" Alice asked, excited.

"Sorry for my incredibly rude best friend," I said, nudging her. Edward grinned.

"You need to get your bags first, then I'll take you to your new home," he said. I loved the way that sounded coming out of his mouth.

Edward had conveniently left out the fact that he was giving us a _huge_ apartment. And, it was a penthouse. Alice practically died.

"You bought a penthouse apartment for a photo studio?" I asked, in shock.

"Good lighting," he shrugged. Alice was all over the place like a child hyped on sugar, dragging Jasper with her. Edward had spent the weeks before our move completely cleaning the place out. It was spotless and brand new looking.

"Bella! Come choose your room!" she shouted. Edward grabbed my hand and pulled me forward.

"Come on, I'll give you a tour," he said with that breathtaking, crooked grin. I gave Alice and Jasper the bigger room. I chose a bedroom that was too big, in my opinion, but it was as far away from their bedroom as possible. I didn't want to be anywhere near their…private quarters. While Edward was still showing me around my insanely large new home with a spectacular view when a sudden thought occurred to me.

"Edward, where do you live?" I asked.

"Oh," he said. "Actually," he walked over to one of my bedroom windows and pointed.

"See that building right there?"

"The one right across from us?"

"Mhmm," he said. "The very top," he pointed.

"So…you live across the street from me?" I asked, giddy.

"Is that bad?" he asked, looking worried.

"No! That's perfect," I said, wrapping my arms around his waist. He kissed my forehead.

"Crap…" I sighed.

"What?"

"Tyra's talk show," I sighed. "She's already leaving me messages about it."

Edward laughed and ruffled my hair.

"Well, you could always change your number."

**AN: So, how'd you like it? No, it still isn't the end, calm down. I'm actually going to let you guys determine how much longer the story's going to be. Do you want me to sum everything up in the next couple of chapters and only elaborate on the major things or do you want it drawn out a little more? I think I have a pretty good idea of what you guys would prefer, but you never know, someone could bring up a really good point in a review. **

**I have the rest of the story completely figured out, so you guys get to be the ones to determine how I reveal it. **

**The amount of reviews you guys have been giving me is amazing. I can't thank you enough (: They've really made me want to get the chapters out faster. We're almost there!  
**

**Let me know what you thought and please tell me which one you'd prefer. Thanks so much!**


	23. Chapter 23

Ahhh! Thank you guys so much! We've hit over 1,000 reviews…the lucky one going to **CrazyWriterr**. I'm so amazed at how much support you all have been giving me. I apologize for the late update—I needed some time to think up something good for this chapter (:

_Six Months Later_

BPOV

"Ladies and gentlemen, I would like to introduce you all to Edward Masen and Bella Swan!"

A makeup artist swatted at my face one last time before Edward laced his fingers through mine as we stepped onto the stage and walked over to Tyra. My stomach churned uneasily. Tyra eventually started making weekly calls, asking us to make an appearance. At first, she claimed she was just checking on Edward, wanting to make sure he was okay, but then she began outright demanding that we do an episode. We didn't really have much of a choice.

I settled on a small loveseat and Edward sat next to me, still holding my hand. We all knew I didn't want to be here. I was pretty sure Edward didn't want to either, but Tyra had a way with words, if that's what you could call it. The last cycle for America's Next Top Model had already been released and aired every week. We agreed to appear on her show the week after the finale was released, as Tyra planned to divulge the details of our "secret romance". In a way, it made me feel sick, like Tyra was trying to corner me and show the world that I did something so horribly wrong. Edward assured me that wasn't the case.

"No, Bella," he'd said after I yelled at him for agreeing to go on the show. "She's doing this because she's proud."

"Proud? You're joking, right?" I asked, almost cowering from embarrassment.

"No, I'm serious. She wants people to see that real love does exist." That softened me up a bit. And now, here we were.

"So, I'm sure most of you recognize this beautiful woman sitting next to me," Tyra announced theatrically. She'd done her hair differently since I'd last seen her. She now brandished long, straight, caramel toned hair that swept past her shoulders. She looked much younger than her actual age.

"And all of you ladies will probably recognize the extremely talented gentleman sitting next to her," she continued. "But what none of you know about is the scandalous relationship that formed between the two of them while we filmed this last cycle of America's Next Top Model." On cue, she motioned to a television next to her and scenes from the cycle flashed on the flat screen. After our momentary jog down memory lane, Tyra clasped her hands together, excitement completely illuminating her eyes.

"Well, what I've always wanted to know," she started, "Is how did your relationship even start? Did you two know each other before the show started?"

I looked over at Edward, waiting for him to answer. After all, he approached me first. Edward shifted forward, ready to tell everyone about how we really met.

"Actually, we didn't know each other. Of course, I'd seen and interacted with her during the judging panel, but I didn't know her at all. We got to know each other when you asked me to stop by the girls' house one night."

Tyra nodded her head. "That's right, I asked you to be my little spy," she laughed. "What happened after that?" Edward nudged me.

"After that," I said, clearing my throat, "he took me for a walk and we eventually got to know one another."

"What was it like for you, Bella? I mean, it must have been hard keeping it from everyone." Tyra brushed her hair out of her face and looked at me expectantly. I rearranged the microphone that was attached to my shirt.

"I…I was scared," I admitted.

"About people finding out?"

"No," I said, clarifying. "I mean, yes, I was afraid of that happening, but I more afraid of the idea of Edward." Edward turned to stare at me, his hand resting lightly atop mine.

"You were afraid of Edward? I thought you were in love with him," Tyra said, asking obvious questions for the sake of the audience.

"I am. And that was what scared me, the idea that I could destroy everything for him. I tried to end things with him, but it didn't really work," I admitted. Edward chuckled beside me.

"How'd you end things? Or, at least try to end them?" she asked.

"She tried to break up with me when she was in the hospital," he said, appearing happy, but I heard the sadness tinged in his voice.

"You dumped him while you were in the hospital?" Tyra asked, amazed.

"I guess so, yeah," I said with a small laugh. "But that lasted for about two days, and we realized breaking up wasn't a good idea for either of us."

"You two really do look amazing together,' Tyra commented. Then she turned to face the audience and the cameras. "Now, don't go anywhere, in a few minutes, we're going to discover more about these two lovebirds!" Makeup artists ran on stage to readjust Tyra's hair and everything else. I kissed Edward swiftly on the cheek, which he returned with his own kiss, planting it fully on my lips. Several members of the audience cheered, causing me to blush uncontrollably. When the show started again, Tyra gave everyone a recap of what we were talking about before turning to pile more questions on us.

"Well, where are you two now?"

"We both live here in New York," Edward said, wrapping his arm around my shoulders.

"Really?" she asked, excitedly. "Do you live together?"

"Yes, we do," Edward said, proudly. I only survived living with Alice and Jasper for a month before Edward picked up on my desperation to get out of there. It was suffocating—mostly because I locked myself in my room whenever they were acting totally engaged…which was all the time. Unfortunately, Edward had set up some firm guidelines, hindering the physical aspect of our relationship. It drove the both of us insane, and I was frustrated with it more than half the time. Edward thought we should wait—our first time wasn't something he just wanted to throw out the window. It made no sense to me, but I respected his wishes. I thought about the day he asked me to move in with him.

_Edward surprised me that morning with breakfast in the bed. He'd spent the night—only sleeping next to me, nothing more—and woke up early to fix us some pancakes. _

"_Good morning," he whispered as he set the tray next to me on the bed. I sat up and smiled at him. _

"_You made breakfast," I said happily. "Thank you." He climbed over the sheets to sit next to me, grabbing his own plate. I pulled my plate onto my lap, but my eyes lingered on something shining on the tray. _

"_Edward, what is that?" I asked, wearily. He swallowed his bite of food and turned to face me. _

"_That's a key to my apartment," he clarified. _

"_Why's it there? I have a spare key to your place already," I said slowly. _

"_I know. But that's not the spare key, that's your key." _

"…_my key?" I asked, confused. He took my hands in his and looked me fully in the eye. _

"_Isabelle Marie," he said, amused, yet serious at the same time. "Will you move in with me? I can't stand the feeling of you being so far away from me, even though you live across the street. My home is too empty, and I won't feel right until you're there with me." _

_I choked on my pancakes. He sat up in alarm, ready to give me the Heimlich, when I gulped down a sip of orange juice and somehow cleared my lungs. _

"_You're asking me to move in with you?" I squeaked. _

"_Yes," he said slowly, still checking to make sure I was okay. I had to strain myself to keep from jumping on him. _

"_Of course I will," I whispered in his ear, kissing his cheek. _

"Wow, so, Bella, what's like living with Edward?" she asked, laughing at the thought of it.

"It's perfect," I replied, trying to stay away from mushy emotions. The audience sighed and awed.

"No commitment issues?" she asked.

"None whatsoever," Edward said before I could answer. "She's my life now, and nothing else matters." Tyra's grin stretched ear to ear and she pulled us into a hug.

"You two are _so_ perfect for one another," she whispered in our ears. When she pulled back, she instantly started on a new tangent.

"So, any new modeling contracts?" she asked, devilishly. I swatted my hand at her, buying myself time before answering her.

"There've been a few offers," I replied, hesitantly. She waited for me to answer fully. I didn't want to tell her how many I'd turned down. Each contract had something to do with me working _all_ the time, or with my leaving home to travel everywhere. It wasn't that I didn't want to travel around the world, I just didn't want to leave Edward. "I've actually been working a lot with Wilhelmina Models as a modeling coach." After a few months of actually modeling for a living, I was miserable. That's when J. contacted me out of the blue, and before I knew it, I was coaching. Tyra's eyes lit up.

"Wilhelmina! A modeling coach? That's wonderful Bella!" I looked down, embarrassed. Edward cupped the back of my neck reassuringly. The show didn't go on much longer after that, and Edward and I were free to live without Tyra's incessant reminders and nagging.

When we got home, I slumped down on the couch, closing my eyes. I felt Edward sit down next to me. He toyed my hair, twisting strands of it around his fingers. It was when I felt his breath along my neck and collarbone that I popped open my eyes and turned to face him.

"What are you doing?" I asked, mesmerized by his smoldering eyes. I swallowed uneasily.

"Right now," he whispered, his breath blowing a stray bang out of my face, "I'm kissing you." Our lips molded together perfectly, moving in beautiful synchronization. My heart rammed against my throat. Knotting my fingers into his hair, I pulled him against me on the couch, deepening our embrace. His breath was just as ragged as mine was when he pulled back to breathe. I stared into his sparking, emerald eyes and felt shivers run down my spine. He leaned in to kiss me again, but as soon as we came into contact, my cell phone buzzed on the coffee table. I groaned and pulled away from him.

"Leave it," he mumbled, kissing my neck. Impulsively, I grabbed it and checked the caller ID.

"Wait," I gasped, trying to control myself. "It's Alice." Edward sighed and sat up. Alice's wedding was in a week. Every time she called, something was going wrong with the caterers or her dress wasn't quite right. I'd been forced into enough fittings at it was. At each and every single one, Alice spotted a mistake as soon as I'd slipped my bride's maid gown on.

"Hi Alice," I said into the receiver, still out of breath.

"Do you want to get coffee with me tomorrow morning?" she asked. I immediately picked up on the desperate tone in her voice.

"Oh no, Alice, is everything okay?" I asked, praying she wasn't getting cold feet.

"Yes, everything's fine," she said quickly. "I just wanted to talk, that's all."

"Well, sure, I'll meet you at Joe's at eight?" I asked, hoping she wouldn't demand that I be there at some other ridiculous hour.

"That's perfect. See you then, love you," she said, hanging up quickly. I stared at the device in my hand, confused.

"What was that about?" Edward asked, pulling the phone out of my hand and setting it down on the table.

"Alice is acting weird," I confessed. "I really hope she's not having second thoughts." Edward brushed the hair out of my face gently.

"I doubt that, Bella," he said flatly. "They already act like they're married. Maybe she just genuinely wanted to have coffee with you?"

"Yeah, maybe you're right," I sighed. "Anyway, what are we doing for dinner?" I asked, too tired from the day's events to actually cook a decent meal. "Would you be upset if I didn't cook us something?"

"Absolutely not," he said reassuringly, brushing his fingertips along my cheekbone. "I can call Gia's and see how long a wait there is," he suggested. Gia's had become one of our favorite Italian restaurants over the past several months. We'd gone there _a lot_.

"Okay," I agreed, happily. My stomach had been growling for the past hour, but I didn't have the energy to get up and feed myself. Edward pulled out his phone and dialed the number while I settled comfortably next to him on the couch, burrowing myself into his side.

"Hey Lucy," Edward said cheerfully. "It's Edward Masen." He paused while she greeted him, now recognizing his voice. "I just want to see how long the wait is, Bella and I are thinking about stopping by." He paused again. "That's perfect, would you put my name down?" he asked. When he hung up, he smiled at me.

"Half an hour wait, she penciled us in." I kissed his shoulder and forced myself to leave the comfort of his arms and the couch.

"I'll go fix myself up," I sighed. My hair probably looked like a haystack now.

"You look beautiful, love," he said, pulling on my wrist to stop me. "Just relax, it's been a long day."

I resisted the urge to pout. "Maybe I should just throw my hair up into a ponytail then," I thought out loud.

"Do whatever's going to make you comfortable," he said, pulling me back into his arms and snaking his hands through my hair. He planted a kiss on my forehead, his lips lingering there for a moment. "We should go," he said, releasing me from his arms. He walked over to the hall closet and muddled around inside it until he pulled out a tan leather jacket for himself and a black pea coat for me.

"Is this coat okay for you?" he asked. I nodded and thanked him for grabbing it for me. Edward swerved the car through traffic on the way to the restaurant, suddenly very quiet. He seemed to be brooding about something, thinking deeply. I didn't want to ask or disturb his thoughts, so I settled on people watching from inside the car. Even though it was dark outside, I could see well enough from the many city lights.

He parked along the street about a block away from the restaurant, knowing we wouldn't find a space further up. Edward was out of his seat in seconds and walking around to open my door for me.

"So chivalrous," I joked, pecking him on the cheek as he leaned down to help me onto the curb. He laced his fingers through mine as we walked to the restaurant. My breath hung in frigid air. For the beginning of October, it was unusually cold. Maybe I just wasn't used to New York weather yet. After all, I hadn't been there long enough to experience all of the seasons. Edward seemed perfectly accustomed to the weather. He still hadn't spoken a full sentence the entire walk. I made most of the conversation and he would agree or mutter short replies. By the time we got to the restaurant, I wanted to stamp my foot and ask him what his problem was. An hour ago, at home, he was perfectly fine. The gears in my head were now turning like mad. Had I said something that upset him at the show? He didn't seem bothered by anything at the time. Maybe he was having second thoughts about us being together? Then the hugest blow of them all ran through my mind: he was taking me here to break up with me. I shuddered and wrapped my arms around myself as we walked into the restaurant, greeted by a friendly waitress.

"Edward," Lucy greeted us. "You're table will be ready in five minutes," she said with a huge grin.

"Thank you," he said, politely. I said down on a bench to wait, my palms now sweaty from sheer nerves. I didn't know what I would do without him; I was _entirely_ dependent upon Edward now. I felt like I couldn't breathe whenever he wasn't around. On the rare occasion that he wasn't home by the time I was ready for bed, I would toss and turn all night until he swooped in to save me, as always. I clung to the pure and simple fact that Edward was my life, and without him, I was nothing. Boy, if my mother could hear me saying that.

I gnawed on my lip until a waitress called Edward's name and we were led to a private booth at the back of the restaurant. She handed us our menus with a fake smile.

"Hi, my name is Jessica and I'll be your server tonight," she started.

"Actually, Jess, let me get these guys," Lucy said, butting in. She had her blond hair tied in an elegant bun at the back of her head and was already waiting for us to order our usual meals.

"I'll have a coke," I ordered, my voice small.

"The same for me," Edward said smoothly.

"Okay, and do we already know what we want to eat?" she asked, placing her hand on her hip. Edward looked across the table at me and shrugged. I already knew what I wanted, but I didn't have much of an appetite.

"My usual," I stated, handing her the menu. She scribbled my order down while Edward ordered his usual as well. When Lucy left, I picked up a packet of sugar from the end of the table and poured its contents on the table, swirling designs in the white powder with my little finger.

"What are you doing?" Edward asked, sounding amused.

"Oh," I said, startled. "Just messing around," I sighed, scooping the sugar into my hand and dropping it into a napkin. Edward shrugged out of his jacket and set it beside him. I didn't want to take my coat off, I felt like its buttons were the only things keeping me together. By the time Lucy brought our food to the table, I felt like I was going to die. The idea that this could have been the last meal I ever ate with Edward was terrifying. I looked at my mushroom ravioli and speared one of the pieces, forcing myself to eat it. Edward ate his chicken parmesan quietly. I wanted to desperately to ask him what was wrong, to ask him what I had done, but he wouldn't even look at me. He just stared down at his plate, picking at his food the same way I was. After what seemed an eternity of silence, he finally looked up at me.

"Bella?" he asked, his voice hoarse.

"Yes?" I all but whispered.

"You do know I meant every word I said on the show today, right?" he asked. Huh?

"I don't…I don't understand," I said, meekly. "What are you talking about?"

"You are my life, the entire reason for my being. I don't know how I've made it this long without you, but I do know that I can't go on without you by my side." His voice was still incredibly hoarse, even shaking. He reached into his pocket.

"Edward?" I asked. He produced a black velvet box and opened it, holding it out in front of me. I gazed down at the beautiful, shining ring that lay nestled between the fabrics.

"I promise to love with the entirety of my soul, to give you everything I have to offer and spend the rest of my life with you, as long as you will allow me to. Isabella Marie Swan, will you marry me?"

I raised a shaking hand to my mouth, in complete shock. My eyes darted between Edward and the ring until I felt hot tears stream down my cheeks.

"Yes," I managed to choke out. "Oh, God, yes." Edward's face completely lit up, stretching into a breathtaking grin as he slid the ring onto my finger, cradling my hand in his. I was still crying, my chest shaking with broken sobs in a cathartic release.

"Why are you crying?" he asked, suddenly panicked. "Did I upset you?" He came around to my side of the table and sat down next to me, wrapping his arms around my body. I shook my head into his shoulder, trying to compose myself.

"No," I whispered. "I thought you were going to break up with me," I gasped.

"What?" he asked, sounding appalled. "You thought I was going to break up with you? That's absolutely absurd. I can't live without you, Bella."

"I can't either," I cried. "I don't know what to do when you aren't here. I just love you so much."

He kissed my temple gently, rocking me back and forth. "Oh, Bella. Now we'll have each other forever," he whispered in my ear. I looked down at the ring on my finger and smiled, feeling elated.

Lucy came by a few moments after that and gave us congratulations, then gave us the bill. I bounced in my seat excitedly on the way home with a dumb grin on my face the entire time. I skipped happily into Edward arms on the way to the elevator. Finding it empty, I leaned in to kiss him, surprised by how much passion he returned in the gesture. My breath hitched in my throat as I felt his tongue run along my bottom lip, begging me to grant him entrance. I accepted, groaning as he wrapped his arms around my waste and pulled me closer to him.

The elevator doors swung open when we got to our floor and I pulled away from him slightly. He scooped me into his arms, surprising me, and carried me into the apartment. His lips immediately crashed down onto mine as soon as the door was closed and locked behind us. Now on my feet, I tangled my fingers in his hair, pressing myself against him as hard as I could. Usually by now, he would have stopped us from going any further, but instead, he gradually led me into the bedroom.

"Edward…" I said, pulling back from him and out of breath. "Are we…?"

"Shhh," he coaxed, pulling me closer to him. My hand fumbled around behind me until I found the edge of bed, pulling us onto it. Before I had even realized it happened, my jacket was removed from my body and Edward was playing with the edge of my shirt, brushing his fingers along the exposed skin of my stomach. My heart was racing as he pulled his own shirt off, revealing his toned muscles and I pulled at the button on his jeans. My mind was screaming the entire time. This was really happening.

When our bodies connected, it was like the pieces of our souls completely molded together, become a single entity. I loved Edward more than I thought it was possible to love anything. The full force of it all hit me the next morning when I woke up. Staring at him while he slept, he looked so peaceful. So perfect. I knew he was the only person in this world that was meant for me.

I quietly got out of bed to get dressed for coffee. I had a little less than a half an hour to get ready and be there. Pulling on a clean pair of jeans and a long sleeved t-shirt, I kissed Edward's cheek lightly and went to write him a note. While I was scribbling my message down, I heard him call my name softly from the bedroom.

"Bella?"

I hurried into the room, nearly launching myself at him and raining kisses down his neck. "I love you," I sang in his ear.

"I love you, too," he whispered at me, kissing me deeply before I left. I met Alice at the coffee shop a few minutes before eight, right on time. I ordered a cup of coffee while she bought a water bottle. When we sat down at the table, her eyes locked on my hand.

"Bella," she started. "What is _that_?" I slowly held up my hand, letting her see the ring. "Oh my God…" she breathed.

"He asked me to marry him last night," I said with a huge grin on my face. She smiled back and reached across the table to pull me into her arms.

"That's wonderful, Bells," she said. "I'm so happy for you!"

"I know," I sighed. "It's perfect."

She sipped her water uncomfortably, still staring at my ring.

"Alice?" I asked, dragging her attention away from my finger. "Is everything okay?" She sighed and dropped her head into her hands.

"I'm such a terrible friend. I should be doing cartwheels around the room for you right now," she said. "I'm so sorry. I've just got a lot on my mind."

"That's okay, Ali," I said, reaching across the table to smooth down her hair. "What's wrong? You aren't having second thoughts, are you?"

Her head snapped up and she shook her head. "No, not at all."

"Then what is it? Did the caterer order Salmon instead of Halibut?"

"No," she sighed, her bottom lip trembling. I waited for her to respond, truly worried. "Bella," she stared, her voice shaking. "I'm pregnant."

The world seemed to stop for a moment. I felt a grin stretch across my face. I couldn't help it. "Really?" I gasped.

"Yeah," she said shortly. "Pregnant."

"That's amazing, Alice!" I exclaimed. She looked up at me slowly, her eyes full of confusion.

"You aren't mad?" she asked.

"Mad? Why would I be mad?" I asked, ecstatic at the thought of being an aunt.

"I just know how much you've wanted kids your entire life, and I didn't want you to hate me because I was having a kid when you weren't. And I'm so terrified that Jasper I won't be ready for it. A baby? How are we going to manage that?"

I sighed and set my coffee down. "First of all, Alice," I said, sternly. "I'm incredibly happy for you, and I'm not angry in the slightest. And second of all, you and Jasper will be wonderful parents. That child is going to be so lucky. And look at the bright side, you aren't going to look fat in your wedding dress because you're getting married so soon. "

She let out a small laugh and smiled at me. "Thanks for this, Bella," she sighed.

"Thanks for what? I'm your best friend. It's what I do." She suddenly perked up and pulled out her phone, dialing a number quickly.

"I have to call the wedding venue—three of Jasper's cousins called yesterday to say they're coming."

"I see," I stated. "Well, I've gotta go," I said, downing the last of my coffee.

"Where are you in such a hurry to get to?"

"I've got my own wedding start planning," I winked at her, really just running back home to jump back into Edward's waiting arms.

**AN: So, I know I threw a lot at you guys in this chapter. I'm trying to wrap things up here, but we've got a couple more chapters left. I know a bunch of you have been asking me to do a sequel, but I honestly don't think that's a very good idea. This story was only meant to be so long, and dragging it out like that would kill it. **

**Buuutttt, I do have something else I want to ask you guys. I know I've got other stories going right now, but I'm completely taken by this idea that popped into my head the other day. Of course, you may ask me what it's about, but I have a really good feeling about this one, and I want to get it started right away. I just want to know if you guys would even be willing to read it, what with my crappy updating and my overall…crappiness. But, please let me know what you think about it. **

**Also, I just wanted to thank you all so much for your support and everything you've done to help me. I really appreciate it, even those of you who send me mean, nasty reviews and PMs. I appreciate you all. **

**Anyway, let me know what you thought of the chapter, or if you have any questions whatsoever. I love you all! (:**


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